“I can’t believe it’s been a year since I didn’t become a better person”
"I can't believe it's been a year since I didn't become a better person" is a jocular New Year's one-line saying that has been printed on an ecard. Someecards posted…
“New Year’s is a holiday created by calendar companies who don’t want you reusing last year’s”
"New Year's is just a holiday created by calendar companies who don't want you reusing last year's calendar" is a jocular New Year's one-line saying that has been…
“My New Year’s resolution is 1080p”
"My New Year's resolution is 1080p is a jocuar New Year's one-line saying that has been printed on several images. 1080p is the resolution for high-definition television (HDTV).…
“New Year’s Eve is the only acceptable time to wear body glitter”
"New Year's Eve is the only acceptable time to wear body glitter without being mistaken for a stripper" is a jocular one-line saying that has been included in many New Year's…
“People treat New Year’s like some sort of life-changing event”
"People treat New Year's like some sort of life-changing event. If your life sucked last year, it's probably still going to suck tomorrow" is a jocular New Year's saying…
“Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right”
American media proprietor and talk show host Oprah Winfrey wrote in O, The Oprah Magazine for New Year's Day 2004: "Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right."…
“Today/Tomorrow is the first blank page of a 365 page book. Write a good one”
"Today/Tomorrow is the first blank page of a 365 page book. Write a good one" is a New Year's saying that has been printed on many images. American country music singer and…
“It’s not what you eat between Christmas and New Year’s that makes you fat…”
Many people are concerned about gaining "holiday pounds" over Christmas and New Year's. A saying has been cited in print since at least 1967: "It's not what you eat between…
“Many people look forward to the new year for a new start on old habits”
"Many people look forward to the new year for a new start on old habits" is a saying that has been printed on many images. No author is usually credited. "Many people look forward to…
“Drop the last year into the silent limbo of the past. Let it go, for it was imperfect”
Brooks Atkinson (1894-1984), the New York (NY) Times theatre critic from 1925 to 1960, wrote in the book Once Around the Sun (1951): "Drop the last year in the silent limbo of the past. Let it…
“New Year’s Eve forecast: Mostly drunk, with a slight chance of passing out”
A jocular drinking saying is: "New Year's Eve forecast: Mostly drunk, with a slight chance of passing out." "This weekends forecast, mostly drunk with a slight chance of passing…
“An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year”
American columnist Bill Vaughan (1915-1977), writing in the column "Senator Soaper Says," said this on December 31, 1963: "An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in;…
“May all your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions”
"May all your troubles last as long as your New Year's resolutions" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Syndicated newspaper entertainment columnist Earl Wilson…
“A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other”
"A New Year's resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other" is a saying that has been printed on many images.The one-line saying has never been attributed to any…
“Youth is when you’re allowed to stay up late on New Year’s Eve”
American columnist Bill Vaughan (1915-1977), writing in the column "Senator Soaper Says," said this on December 31, 1958: "Youth is when you are allowed to stay up late on New…
“Money’s short, times are hard. Here’s your fucking Christmas card”
"Money's scarce/short/tight, times are hard. Here's your fucking Christmas card" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many ecards. The card implies that no money will be…
“Why are there no Walmarts in Iraq?”/“Because they’re all Targets.”
Walmart and Target are competitor retail stores. A joke was told around the time of the Gulf War, such as this one posted to the newsgroup rec.humor.funny on March 14, 1991: Q: Why are there no…
“I didn’t sign up for the 401k at work, because there’s no way I can run that far”
A 301(k) retirement savings contribution plan shouldn't be confused with a 10K (kilometers) run, but there's a joke: "I didn't sign up for the 401k at work, because there's…
“New Yorkers are noted for their stupidity” (NYC’s population is very dense)
A popular joke has a teacher ask students what the people of London or New York are noted for. One student says that the people are noted for their stupidity because the textbook says that…
“Why was the cannibal expelled from school?”/“Because he was buttering up his teacher.”
A popular "cannibal in school" riddle is: Q: Why was the cannibal expelled frm school?A: Because he was buttering up his teacher. The cannibal jokehas been cited in print since at least…