“Two seasons—winter and August”
"This place has only two seasons -- winter and August" (or "winter and the Fourth of July") is said of any place that has a very long winter season. "We have but two…
“Two tips for Christmas: 1. Forget the past. You can’t change it. 2. Forget the present. I didn’t get you one”
"Two tips for Christmas: 1. Forget the past. You can't change it. 2. Forget the present. I didn't get you one" is a joke that has been printed on many images. There is a pun on…
“u believe in stars? fool. those are the holes poked in the container so we can breathe”
"What if they're not stars, but holes poked into the top of the container so we can breathe" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "u believe in stars? fool.…
“Ugh…January. The whole month is just a giant Monday”
"January (n.) A giant Monday" and "Ugh...January. The whole month is just a giant Monday" are sayings that have been printed on many images. "January's like a giant…
“Very excited for this hide my fat weather”
"Very excited for this hide my fat weather" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Cold weather means wearing more clothing to hide fat. "I'm ready for hoodie weather…
“Wait, there’s nothing in this Air and Space Museum!”
What's in an air and space museum? Just air and space? "I want my money back. I went to the air and space museum and there was nothing in it. http://bit.ly/NpDLu7 via @sickipedia"…
“Warning: Going to sleep on Sunday will cause Monday”
Some people dread Monday (the traditional start of the work week) so much that they're afraid to go to sleep on Sunday night. "Warning: Going to sleep on Sunday will cause Monday" is…
“Watch repairmen always get to work on time”
Who always gets to work on time? A pun was posted on Twitter on June 8, 2011: "Watch repairmen always get to work on time." TwitterIB @MagnumXIIRT @rodney_at_large: Watch repairmen…
“Water uses cloud storage”
Cloud storage doesn't involve actual clouds, but there are jokes. "@K_Afqua: Every water bottling company uses cloud storage" was posted on Twitter by Grand Master Force (ENTP) on…
“We accept weather predictions from a rodent, but deny climate change evidence by scientists”
A political Groundhog Day saying that has been printed on many images is: "Only in America do we accept weather predictions from a rodent, but deny climate change evidence by scientists. Happy…
“We call it fall because leaf fall down”
Is the season called "autumn" or "fall"? A jocular explanation was posted on Twitter -- it is now removed -- by Little Rocket Jim on November 19, 2013: "Little Rocket…
“We call it fall because leaves fall down”
Is the season called "autumn" or "fall"? A jocular explanation was posted on Twitter -- it is now removed -- by Little Rocket Jim on November 19, 2013: "Little Rocket…
“We interrupt your happiness to bring you Monday morning. Your regularly scheduled happiness will resume on Friday”
"We interrupt your happiness (and positivity) to bring you Monday (morning). Your regularly scheduled happiness (and positivity) will resume on Friday" is a saying that has been printed…
“We made it to Friday! Raise your cup to surviving another week of ‘What the hell now?’”
“We made it to Friday! Raise your cup to surviving another week of WTF-ery” and "We made it to Friday! Raise your cup to surviving another week of 'What the hell now?'" are…
“We made it to Friday! Raise your cup to surviving another week of WTF-ery”
“We made it to Friday! Raise your cup to surviving another week of WTF-ery” and "We made it to Friday! Raise your cup to surviving another week of 'What the hell now?'" are…
“We squint at the sun because it is bright. We squint at people because they are not”
"We squint at the sun because it's bright. We squint at people because they're not" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "We squint at the sun because…
“We squint at the sun because it’s bright. We squint at people because they aren’t”
"We squint at the sun because it's bright. We squint at people because they're not" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "We squint at the sun because…
“We squint at the sun because it’s bright. We squint at people because they’re not”
"We squint at the sun because it's bright. We squint at people because they're not" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "We squint at the sun because…
“Weather forecast for tonight: dark”
New York City-born comedian George Carlin (1937-2008) performed the bit "Al Sleet, the hippy-dippy weatherman," containing the memorable joke: "Tonight's forecast: dark.…
“Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers”
"Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers" is one-line saying that comes from aviation. The saying means that, like horoscopes, weather forecasts aren't very accurate.…