“‘Santa isn’t real’ ok, I literally saw him at the mall”
Many shopping malls have Santa Claus displays for Christmas. Do mall Santas mean that Santa is real? "first christmas as an adult and my dad just told me that santa isn’t real but i…
“1st rule of family gatherings, always bring your own vehicle so you can leave when you want”
"1st rule of family gatherings always bring your own vehicle so you can leave when you want" was posted on Twitter by CARI on January 12, 2019. The tweet received over 110,000 likes, and…
“A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween”
"A grandmother pretends she doesn't know who you are on Halloween" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "A grandparent pretends he doesn't know who you are on…
“A haunted house but instead of scary monsters it’s 15 ppl asking u what u are doing with ur life & who u r marrying oh wait that’s thanksgiving”
A jocular Halloween haunted house suggestion was posted on X/Twitter -- the tweet is no longer available -- by Lindsay Fuce @lindsay_fuce on November 2, 2017: "A haunted house but instead of…
“A man’s life: He believes in Santa Claus, he doesn’t believe in Santa Claus, he is Santa Claus”
New York-based syndicated entertainment columnist Earl Wilson (1907-1987) wrote in November 1964: "WISH I'D SAID THAT: A man goes through three Santa Claus stages. First he believes in…
“A mother holds her children’s hands for a while, but their hearts forever”
"A mother holds her children's hands for a while, but their hearts forever" (or "Mothers hold their children's hands for a while, but their hearts forever") is a…
“About all you can do is dream of a white Christmas; it leaves most of us in the red”
"I'm dreaming of a white Christmas" is a famous line in Irving Berlin's classic Christmas song, "White Christmas" (1942). A "white Christmas" joke was cited…
“About to put on a suit and tie for the party. Yes, I’m dressing up for Halloween”
"Dress up" often involves a suit and tie, but for Halloween? "They told me to dress up for the halloween party, so i wore a suit and tie" was posted on Twitter by Augie on…
“Am I going to put the Christmas tree up myself? No, I’m going to put it up in the living room!”
A somewhat NSFW Christmas tree joke was posted on Twitter by Andy L Smith on December 18, 2009: "I bought a Christmas tree today The girl in the shop asked if I was going to put it up myself I…
“Are you putting the Christmas tree up yourself?”/“No, I’m going to put it up in the living room!”
A somewhat NSFW Christmas tree joke was posted on Twitter by Andy L Smith on December 18, 2009: "I bought a Christmas tree today The girl in the shop asked if I was going to put it up myself I…
“Bad puns on St. Patrick’s Day don’t just shame you. They Seamus all”
"Remember, (Irish) puns on St. Patrick's Day don't just shame you. They Seamus all" (also "Bad puns on St. Patrick’s Day don't just shame you. They Seamus all"…
“Bank account looking like everybody getting a text message for Christmas”
"Bank account looking like everybody getting a text message for Christmas" (or "Just checked my bank account and it looks like everyone getting text messages for Christmas") is…
“Bats are just Halloween butterflies”
"Bats are just Halloween butterflies" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "The painted bat is like a halloween butterfly" was posted on Reddit -- Woahdude on…
“Big Apple” float (NY Daily News in Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade)
the Daily News (New York, NY) newspaper had a "Big Apple" float in the annual Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade from 1977 until 2017 (except for the years 1990, 2000 and 2004). Three…
“Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother”
"Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother" is a popular Mother's Day saying that has been printed on many images. American talk show host, producer and philanthropist…
“Bunny kisses and Easter wishes”
"Bunny kisses and Easter wishes" is a seasonal saying that has been printed on many images. "Happy Easter Wishes, and Sweet Bunny Kisses!" was posted on Twitter by v.fo on April…
“Candied yams are the fruitcake of Thanksgiving”
Various foods have been called “the fruitcake of Thanksgiving.” That is to say, like fruitcake, it’s a food mainly eaten on the holiday (as with fruitcake and Christmas) and at no other time,…
“Candy canes are the candy corn of Christmas”
Various foods have been called "the candy corn of Christmas." That is to say, like candy corn, it's a food mainly eaten on the holiday (as with candy corn and Halloween) and at no…
“Cherry cordials are the candy corn of Christmas”
Various foods have been called "the candy corn of Christmas." That is to say, like candy corn, it's a food mainly eaten on the holiday (as with candy corn and Halloween) and at no…
“Chex mix is the candy corn of Christmas”
Various foods have been called "the candy corn of Christmas." That is to say, like candy corn, it's a food mainly eaten on the holiday (as with candy corn and Halloween) and at no…