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January 14, 2026
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Do restaurants still make people wash the dishes if they can’t pay? I was thinking of treating myself tomorrow”

"LOL do restaurants still make you wash dishes if you dont have the money to pay?!" was posted on X/Twitter by Agape Love ❤️‍🔥 on January 16, 2010. It's entirely fictional…

December 3, 2022
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Do they have restaurants in Japan where American people cook in front of you with lawn chairs?”

"Do they have restaurants in Japan where American people cook in front of you with lawn chairs and a grill?" is a saying that has been printed on several images. That is, the speaker…

January 14, 2026
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Do they still make people wash dishes at restaurants when they fail to pay? I wanna spoil myself”

"LOL do restaurants still make you wash dishes if you dont have the money to pay?!" was posted on X/Twitter by Agape Love ❤️‍🔥 on January 16, 2010. It's entirely fictional…

April 30, 2018
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Do you deliver?”/“No, but we do chicken, lamb and fish.”

A restaurant joke -- usually an Indian restaurant -- about takeout/takeaway is: PERSON ON PHONE TO RESTAURANT: Do you deliver?RESTAURANT EMPLOYEE: No, but we do chicken, lamb and fish.…

December 3, 2017
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Do you have reservations?”/“Yes, but I’ll eat here anyway.”

Some people have reservations for a restaurant, while others have reservations about a restaurant. A popular joke has been cited in print since at least 1975: RESTAURANT HOST OR HOSTESS: Do you…

July 18, 2018
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Do you know what’s on the menu? Me-n-u”

"Do you know what's on the menu? Me-n-u" -- that is, "me and you" -- is a pickup line that has been printed on many images. "'WHAT does menu mean?' said a…

March 19, 2009
Food/DrinkRestaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Do you serve crabs here?” (joke)

An old joke is the one about the diner who went into a restaurant and asked: "Do you serve crabs here?" The quick-witted waiter replied: "We serve anyone. Sit down." The joke…

May 2, 2024
Food/DrinkRestaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Do you serve crackers?”/“We serve everybody.”

The word "cracker" has several meanings. "Do you serve crackers?"/"We serve everybody" is a popular joke. In the American sketch comedy television series In Living…

July 11, 2018
Food/DrinkRestaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Do you serve fishcakes?” (restaurant joke)

A "fishcake" is a cake made out of fish, but a joke has it that a "fish cake" is a cake made for a fish. The fishcake joke was posted on the newsgroup cableinet.chatter on June…

March 11, 2016
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Do you serve women at this bar?”/“No, you have to supply your own.”

An old bar/restaurant joke is: Customer: “Do you serve women at this bar?” Bartender: “No, sir, you have to bring your own.” The joke possibly dates to 1936 (the Google Books date might be…

January 15, 2019
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Does McDonald’s Sell Cheese Burgers?” (math mnemonic)

"Does McDonald's Sell/Serve Cheese Burgers" is a math mnemonic used by many elementary school teachers. The letters "DMSCB" stand for "Divide Multiply Subtract Check…

April 22, 2025
Food/DrinkRestaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Does produce get those stickers because they were so well behaved or voted?”

Price look-up code stickers are placed on produce. They are not the same stickers that children get for good behavior, but there are jokes. "Bananas Get Their Stickers From Being Well…

January 7, 2025
Food/DrinkPets (Dogs, Cats, Horses)Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Dogs aren’t allowed in bars because they can’t control their licker”

"Liquor" shouldn't be confused with "licker," but there are jokes. "Q. Why don't they allow dogs in bars? A. Because most of them can't hold their licker!…

January 25, 2025
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Don’t ask your girl where she wants to eat. Instead, tell her to guess where you’re taking her to eat”

Men often ask women out to dinner, but the women often refuse all suggestions of where to eat. There is a trick some men use to avoid this problem. "ULPT: Don't ask your girl where she…

September 14, 2024
Food/DrinkRestaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Don’t trust anyone that orders a medium pizza”

Many people cannot understand how anyone orders a medium pizza. One should always order a large pizza, even if there is leftover pizza. "@FabMissK: 'Pl[a]ybook is like a medium pizza. Who…

December 25, 2025
Food/DrinkRestaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Don’t hand me a basket of bread and then immediately be like ‘don’t fill up on bread,’ that’s super confusing…”

A family often goes to a restaurant such as Texas Roadhouse, and a basket of bread is placed on the table. One parent usually warns the children, "Don't fill up on bread!" However,…

August 3, 2023
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Don’t judge a book by its cover, but always judge a Tex-Mex restaurant by their chips and salsa”

Many Texans love the free chips and salsa served at Tex-Mex restaurants. But is this a basis to choose a restaurant? "Don't judge a book by its cover, but always judge a TexMex restaurant…

April 28, 2020
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Don’t know how I feel about bars opening back up. Drinks gonna be weak compared to mine”

The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in many bars being closed. Liquor stores were left open, and many people made drinks at home. "Yesterday a worker at Walmart was talking to someone…

June 5, 2020
Restaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food Stores

“Donald Trump walks into a bar…” (bar joke)

"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." "[X] walks into a bar...and lowers it" is a popular form of the joke, where…

August 5, 2024
Food/DrinkRestaurants/Bars/Coffeehouses/Food StoresTransportationWork/Businesses

“Done with dating sites. I’m now focusing on pizza delivery guys because at least I know they have a job, a car, and pizza”

A joke about dating was posted on X/Twitter by 〰 Just Linda 〰 on April 9, 2017, and this received over 2,000 likes: "Done with dating sites. I'm now focusing on pizza delivery guys…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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