“Why don’t escalators and stairs have music like elevators?”
There is "elevator music," but usually no music for escalators or stairs. "Why dont escalators and stairs have music like elevators" was posted on Twitter by Sean on January 18,…
“Why don’t football players wear glasses?”/“Because it’s a contact sport.”
A joke about "contact" sports is: Q: Why don't football players wear glasses?A: Because it's a contact sport. "It seems wrong to wear glasses in a contact sport" was…
“Why don’t ghosts like rain?”/“It dampens their spirits.”
A popular Halloween riddle about ghosts is: Q: Why don't ghosts like rain?A: It dampens their spirits. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1987. “Why do ghosts like to ride in…
“Why don’t government workers stare out the window in the morning?”
There's an old joke about government workers (civil servants): Q: Why don't civil servants look out the window in the morning? A: Because they'd have nothing to do in the afternoon.…
“Why don’t helicopters fly in the morning?”/“Twirly.”
A helicopter riddle is: Q: Why don't helicopters fly in the morning?A: Twirly "Twirly" sounds like "too early." The joke is from Reddit-Jokes by MoeBacon4246 on June 3,…
“Why don’t I eat beans? Because it gives migas”
"Migas" (a Tex-Mex dish) might sound like "me gas." A joke has been cited in print since at least 2015: Q: Why don’t I eat beans?A: Cuz it gives migas. Wikipedia: MigasMexican…
“Why don’t Jews drink? It interferes with their suffering”
The Jewish people must love suffering, it's often said, because they have so much of it. A popular joke is: Q: Why don't Jews drink? A: It interferes with their suffering. The joke was…
“Why don’t keyboards sleep?”/“Because they have two shifts.”
A riddle about the computer keyboard is: Q: Why don't keyboards sleep?A: Because they have two shifts. "Do u know why keyboards never get tired ???. . .because they have two shifts .…
“Why don’t lawyers play hide-and-seek?”/“Nobody will look for them.”
A lawyer riddle is: Q: Why don't lawyers play hide-and-seek?A: Nobody will look for them. The lawyer joke has been cited in print since at least 1987. 10 September 1987, Seattle (WA) Times…
“Why don’t lions like fast food?” (joke)
"Fast food" means food that is prepared quickly -- not animals that are fast or slow. "Why doesn't a lion like fast food?" is a joke that was on Twitter on August 15, 2012.…
“Why don’t melons run away to get married?”/“Because they cantaloupe.”
"Cantaloupe" sounds like "can't elope." The pun has been cited in print since at least 1886. 9 September 1886, Wall Street Daily News (New York, NY), pg. 1, col. 2:FRED…
“Why don’t Mexicans have barbecues?”/“Because the beans fall through the grill.”
A barbecue joke is: Q: Why don't Mexicans have barbecues?A: Because the beans fall through the grill. The joke -- sometimes regarded as offensive -- has been cited in print since at least…
“Why don’t monsters eat ghosts?”/“Because they taste like sheet.”
"Sheet" sounds like "shit." "do you know what ghosts taste like? Sheet!" was posted on Twitter by Brian Korte on February 1, 2017. "Why don’t zombies eat ghost?…
“Why don’t orphans play baseball?”/“They don’t know where home is.”
A baseball riddle (a "home" plate pun) is: Q: Why don't orphans play baseball?A: They don't know where home is. "Stupid question: Why don't orphans play…
“Why don’t pâtissiers buy cigarettes?”/“Because they profiterole their own.”
"Profiterole" (a cream puff) sounds a little like "prefer to roll." "Why don't English deserts buy cigarettes? Because they profiterole their own" was posted on…
“Why don’t people eat bear meat?”/“It’s too gristly.”
"Grizzly" sounds a little like "gristly." A pun about bear meat is: Q: Why don't people eat bear meat?A: It's too gristly. "“Well, I don't like bear meat…
“Why don’t pirates need lawyers?”/“They prefer to settle through ARRrrrbitration.”
A pirate riddle is: Q: Why don't pirates need lawyers?A: They prefer to settle through ARRrrrbitration! The joke was posted on PirateJokes.net on September 18, 2010, and has been printed on an…
“Why don’t restaurants serve noodles after 10:00 PM?”/“It’s pasta bedtime.”
Pasta has been used in "pasta bedtime" ("past bedtime") jokes. "What did the spaghetti say to the cheese at midnite???? ITS PASTA MY BEDTIME!!!!!" was posted on…
“Why don’t the Chinese gamble?”/“Because they don’t like Tibet.”
"Tibet" sounds like "to bet," and there are jokes. "ARE YOU AGAINST ALL FORMS OF GAMBLING OR DO YOU LIKE TIBET?" was posted on the newsgroup talk.politics.tibet on…
“Why don’t they allow donkeys in school?”/“Because no one likes a smart ass.”
A school riddle is: Q: Why don't they allow donkeys in school?A: Because no one likes a smart ass. "I know a donkey with an I.Q. of 138! Hasn't got a friend in the world. 'Cause…