“West Texas Girls…don’t wear lip gloss during a dust storm”
"West Texas Girls...don't wear lip gloss during a dust storm" is a T-shirt saying. Glenn Dromgoogle's book 100 Great Things About Texas (2005) lists this as Great Thing #34:…
Alphebetical for "w"
“Wet as an otter’s pocket” (very wet)
"Wets as an otter's pocket" (or "Wetter than an otter's pocket") is a saying that has been printed on many images. "You're as wet as an otter" was…
“Wetter than an otter’s pocket” (very wet)
"Wets as an otter's pocket" (or "Wetter than an otter's pocket") is a saying that has been printed on many images. "You're as wet as an otter" was…
“Whack ‘em and stack ‘em” (hunting saying)
"Whack 'em and stack 'em" is a hunting term that was coined by American rock musician Ted Nugent; the term has been cited in print since at least November 1989. Animals are…
“Whale oil beef hooked” (How to speak Irish in one easy lesson)
"Whale oil beef hooked" are words that have been printed on many images. Supposedly, it's a joke of how an Irish persons says, "Well, I'll be fucked." The words have…
“What a house! Nothing but rooms!”
Yankee catcher Yogi Berra (1925-2015) moved into a large house in New Jersey in 1961, and he was asked to describe the place. Berra said: "What a place it is. Nothing but rooms." The…
“What a teacher writes on the blackboard of life can never be erased”
"What a teacher writes on the blackboard of life can never be erased" is a saying that has been printed on many images, usually showing the saying in chalk on a blackboard. The saying has…
“What a year this week has been”
"What a year this week has been" has been printed on many images. "Well what a fucking year this week has been" has also been printed on many images. The saying is popular on…
“What always comes at the end of Thanksgiving?”/“The letter G.”
A popular Thanksgiving riddle is: Q: What always comes at the end of Thanksgiving?A: The letter "g." The riddle has been cited in print since at least 2006, when it was included on a web…
“What animal can be found in the unemployment line?”/“The poorqueuepine.”
A "porcupine" (a mammal) has nothing to do with a "poor queue," but there have been puns. "A prickly tree standing in line with other trees waiting for a handout during the…
“What are ‘derves’? I heard the whores love ‘em”
"Hors d'oeuvres" is difficult for many Americans to spell. The term has nothing to do with whores, but there are jokes. "First the simple whore derves" was printed in The…
“What are apricots?”/“Where monkeys sleep.”
Apricots aren't made from apes or cots, but there's a riddle: Q: What are apricots?A: Where monkeys sleep. The joke was posted on Twitter on September 15, 2009.…
“What are lawyers good for?” (lawyer joke)
One popular lawyer joke is: Q. What are lawyers good for? A. They make used car salesmen look good. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1992. Google Groups: rec.humorLawyer JokesSlime…
“What are murder hornets and how much toilet paper do we need to buy?”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in panic buying -- and shortages -- of toilet paper. In 2020, the United States also experienced from Asia an invasion of "murder hornets."…
“What are people who back into parking spots trying to prove?”
People who back into parking spots are a peeve for many other people. "I can't help but think people who back into parking spots are just showing off" was posted on Twitter by…
“What are Santa’s favorite potato chips?”/“Crisp Pringles.”
"Kris Kringle" can sound like "crisp Pringles" (Pringles is an American brand of stackable potato-based crisps), and of course, there are jokes. "Last night I was visited…
“What are the strongest days of the week?”/“Saturday and Sunday. The rest are weekdays.”
A riddle about the days of the week has been cited in print since at least 1855: Q: What is the strongest day of the week?A: Sunday. All of the rest are "weak" days. Saturday later joined…
“What are the two things you can’t eat for breakfast?” (riddle)
"What are the two things you can't eat for breakfast?" is a classic food riddle. "Lunch and dinner" is the answer. "You know, there are two things that I can't…
“What are those things you blow to make a wish?”/“Sugar daddies.”
"My friend: 'What do you call those things you blow and make a wish?' Me: 'Breathalyzer?'" is a joke that has been printed on many images. A birthday cake has candles,…
“What are unhappy cranberries called?”/“Blueberries.”
"What are unhappy cranberries called? Blueberries." The cranberries joke -- included in many Thanksgiving joke collections -- has been cited in print since at least 1986. Google BooksThe…