“Who needs therapy when you can shitpost on X/Twitter?”
Who needs expensive therapy when you can shitpost on social media for free? "who needs therapy when you can shitpost ab being depressed on tumblr" was posted on X/Twitter by woefully…
Alphebetical for "w"
“Who ordered the clean glass?” (Myron Cohen joke about Stage Deli)
"Who ordered the clean glass?" is a classic restaurant joke of the late Bronx-born comedian Myron Cohen. It's said to have started at the Stage Deli (Seventh Avenue in the West 50s).…
“Who painted Whistler’s mother?” (riddle/joke)
Arrangement in Grey and Black No.1, or Whistler's Mother is a famous 1871 painting by James Abbott McNeill Whistler (1834-1903). "Whistler's mother was painted by what famous…
“Who says a good newspaper has to be dull?” (NY Herald Tribune slogan)
"Who says a good newspaper has to be dull?" was the famous 1960s ad campaign for the New York (NY) Herald Tribune that attempted to take readership from the rival New York (NY) Times.…
“Who says I can’t cook? You obviously haven’t tasted my cereal”
"Who says I can't cook? You obviously haven't tasted my cereal" is a jocular line that has been printed on many images. Adding milk to cereal is not cooking, of course. "I…
“Who says, ‘Oh, Oh, Oh’?”/“Santa walking backwards.”
A Christmas riddle is: Q: Who says "Oh, oh, oh"?A: Santa walking backwards. Santa Claus usually says, "Ho, ho, ho." "Q. Who says Oh, Oh, Oh. A. Santa walking…
“Who steals noodles from the rich and gives them to the poor?”/“Ramen Hood.”
Ramen Hood (ramen + Robin Hood) has been the name of food establishments in New York City, Scottsdale (AZ) and Los Angeles (CA). A joke is that Ramen Hood steals noodles/soup from the rich to give…
“Who steals soup from the rich and gives it to the poor?”/“Ramen Hood.”
Ramen Hood (ramen + Robin Hood) has been the name of food establishments in New York City, Scottsdale (AZ) and Los Angeles (CA). A joke is that Ramen Hood steals noodles/soup from the rich to give…
“Who stopped payment on my reality check?”
"Who stopped payment on my reality check?"is a jocular line that has been printed on T-shirts, posters and an ecard. "OK, who stopped payment on my reality check?" has been…
“Who the government?”
NBC's Saturday Night Live did a sketch about the U.S. healthcare program ("Obamacare") featuring someone impersonating Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius. Speaking…
“Who turns the lights off at Halloween?”/“The light’s witch.”
A Halloween riddle is: Q: Who turns the lights off at Halloween?A: The light's witch. The "light's switch"/"light switch" joke has been cited in print since at least…
“Who Wants Jack Daniel’s?” or “We Want Jack Daniel’s” (WWJD)
"What Would Jesus Do?" (WWJD) is a saying from the 19th century. A drink variant of "WWJD" -- "Who Wants Jack Daniel's?" ("We Want Jack Daniel's")…
“Who Wants Jelly Donuts?” or “We Want Jelly Donuts” (WWJD)
"What Would Jesus Do?" (WWJD) is a saying from the 19th century. A food variant of "WWJD" -- "We Want Jelly Donuts" or "Who Wants Jelly Donuts?" -- has been…
“Who was the greatest actor in the Bible?”/“Samson. He brought the house down.”
A Bible riddle is: Q: Who was the greatest actor in the Bible?A: Samson. He brought the house down. To "bring the house down" is to achieve approval from the audience (the theatrical…
“Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?” (joke)
A popular Bible joke is: Q: Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?A: Pharaoh's daughter. She went down the the bank of the Nile and drew out a little prophet (profit). The joke…
“Who was the sweetest knight at the round table?”/“Sir Up.”
"Syrup" can sound like "Sir Up." "And Sir Up. he's sweet" was posted on the newsgroup alt.humor.puns on September 25, 1996. "Sir Up of Pancakes" was…
“Who was the wisest financial investor in the Bible?” (joke)
"Who was the wisest financial investor in the Bible?" begins an old joke. The answer is Noah because he was able to float a company while the rest of the world was in liquidation. The…
“Who were the first people to make pastries?”/“The pie-oneers.”
"Pie-oneer" (pie + pioneer) is a jocular portmanteau word, usually used to describe a "first" involving a pie. "The old time pastry cooks have organized a pie-oneer…
“Who will join old Ben Milam in storming the Alamo?”
"Who will join old Ben Milam in storming the Alamo?" (usually quoted as "Who will go with old Ben Milam into San Antonio?") was the appeal of Texas soldier Benjamin Rush Milam…
“Who would name their company FedEx? That’s two things that I never want showing up at my door”
"FedEx" originally stood for "Federal Express," but a joke has it stand for something else. "Why the name @FedEx? That's two things I would not want showing up at my…