“Whoever snuck the ‘s’ in ‘fast food’ was a clever little bastard”
"Fast food" is only one letter away from being "fat food." "Whoever snuck the 's' in 'fast food' was a clever little bastard" is a jocular line…
Alphebetical for "w"
“Whoever thinks money doesn’t bring happiness, transfer it to my account”
"Money can't buy happiness" is a proverb that has been cited in English since at least 1821. There have been many jocular additions to the proverb. "Whoever thinks money…
“Whoever wins the turnover battle usually wins the game” (football adage)
"Whoever wins the turnover battle usually wins the game" is a generally accepted football adage. The term "turnover battle" (a "battle" with the "war" being…
“Whole Foods, Whole People, Whole Planet” (Whole Foods slogan)
"Whole Foods, Whole People, Whole Planet" is the the slogan of Whole Foods Market, an Austin-based natural and organic foods supermarket that began in 1980. It's a whole lotta…
“Whole kit and caboodle”
"The whole kit and caboodle" is an older expression for what we might nowadays say is "the whole nine yards" -- that is, "everything." In the 1800s, the phrase was…
“Whomever stole my highlighter, I’ll find you. Mark my words”
"Mark my words" is an expression meaning that one should remember what the speak is saying. "Mark my words" usually does not involve literally marking words, but there are…
“Whoppers are a poor man’s Maltesers”
The candies Milk Duds (introduced in 1928), Maltesers (introduced in the United Kingdom in 1937), Whoppers (introduced in the United States in 1949), Revels (introduced in the United Kingdom in…
“Why allow yourself to be full of hate, when you can be full of coffee instead?”
"Why allow yourself to be full of hate, when you can be full of coffee instead?" is a coffee saying that has been printed on several images. "Be full of coffee, not hate" has…
“Why am I the only naked person at this gender reveal party?”
At a "gender reveal party," the sex of a baby is revealed. The sex of someone attending the party isn't revealed, but there are jokes. "Why am I the only naked person at this…
“Why am I the only person naked at this gender reveal party?”
At a "gender reveal party," the sex of a baby is revealed. The sex of someone attending the party isn't revealed, but there are jokes. "Why am I the only naked person at this…
“Why are a Texas tornado and a Tennessee divorce the same? (joke)
A popular redneck joke is: Q: Why are a Texas tornado and a Tennessee divorce the same?A: Somebody's gonna lose a trailer. The joke was cited in a "That's Jake" comic strip by…
“Why are airplanes so hard to see?”/“Because they’re in disguise.”
"Disguise" can sound like "de skies" (the skies). A pun is: Q: Why are airplanes so hard to see?A: Because they're in disguise. The joke was posted on Twitter by…
“Why are Americans so bad at League of Legends?”/“Because they can’t defend their towers.”
A riddle about the multiplayer online battle arena video game League of Legends hints at the September 11, 2001 attacks on New York City's World Trade Center: Q: Why are Americans so bad at…
“Why are Americans so dumb?”/“Because they shoot the ones who go to school.”
A possibly politically incorrect joke on the subject of school shootings was posted on Reddit -- MeanJokes on July 6, 2018: Q: Why are Americans so dumb?A: Because they shoot the ones who go to…
“Why are artichokes so beloved?”/“They’re known for their hearts.”
A popular Valentine’s Day riddle is: Q: Why are artichokes so beloved?A: They’re known for their hearts. "Why are artichokes so beloved? They’re known for their hearts" was posted…
“Why are bass guitarists always safe?”/“Because they stay out of treble.”
"Good bass players stay out of treble" -- "treble" is a joke on the word "trouble" -- is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Bass players try to stay…
“Why are buffalo wings so small when buffalo are so big?”
"Buffalo wings" are chicken wings that were first popularized in Buffalo, New York. The wings are not from a buffalo animal, but there are jokes. "Why are buffalo wings so small?…
“Why are Chinese restaurant owners the best renters?”/“Because they’re lo mein tenants.”
"Low maintenance" can sound like "lo mein tenants," and of course, there are Chinese restaurant jokes. "why are Chinese restaurant owners the best renters?: Because…
“Why are Christmas trees so bad at sewing?”/“They always drop their needles.”
A Christmas tree riddle is: Q: Why are Christmas trees like bad knitters? A: They both drop their needles. The Christmas joke has been cited in print since at least 1994. Google BooksThe Father…
“Why are clouds like jockeys?”/“When they hold the rains.”
A "rains/reins" pun from 1878 is: "When are the clouds like jockeys? When they hold the rains." The joke was repopularized (or reinvented) in the 2000s. "Why are clouds…