“The halfway point of a marathon is 20 miles” (running adage)
A marathon is 26.2 miles; a half-marathon is 13.1 miles. However, marathoners often experience "the wall" of endurance at the 20-mile mark. "There is a saying among marathoners:…
Alphebetical for "t"
“The Happiness I Never Knew” (“think” backronym)
"The Happiness I Never Knew" is a backronym (back acronym) of the word "think." This was given under "Alconym" (Alcoholics Anonymous + acronym) on the newsgroup…
“The harder you work for something, the greater you’ll feel when you achieve it”
"The harder you work for something, the greater you'll feel when you achieve it" is an inspirational saying that has been printed on many images. "The harder you work for…
“The hardest animal to kill is a school mascot”
"The hardest/toughest animal to kill is a school mascot" is a popular saying with school administrators, especially when there is talk about closing a school. "The hardest animal to…
“The hardest lift of all is lifting your butt off the couch”
"The hardest lift of all is lifting your butt off the couch" is an exercise saying that has been printed on many images. "Sometimes the hardest part of working out is getting your…
“The hardest part about being vegan is waking up at 5 a.m. to milk the almonds”
"The hardest part about being vegan is having to wake up at 5am to milk all the almonds" is a jocular line about almond milk that was posted on Twitter on May 24, 2013. "The hardest…
“The hardest part of bringing your lunch to work is resisting the temptation to eat it”
Bringing lunch to work causes temptations. "The hardest part of bringing your lunch to work is resisting the temptation to eat it in the first half hour" is a saying that was posted on…
“The hardest part of making skimmed milk is throwing the cows across the lake”
"Skimmed milk" has nothing to do with "stone skimming," but there are jokes. "The hardest part of making skimmed milk is throwing the cows across the lake" was posted…
“The hardest part of my job is being nice to stupid people”
"The hardest part of my job is being nice to stupid people" and "I'm not qualified to be nice to stupid people" are jocular work sayings that have been printed on many…
“The hardest part of saving the second half of the sandwich is knowing it’s just right over there”
A sandwich is often cut in half, and people have several feelings about the second half of the sandwich. "The Second half of a sandwich is always the best piece" was posted on X/Twitter…
“The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn”
"The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn" is a popular saying that has been printed on posters and ecards. "One of the many difficult decisions…
“The hardest thing to raise in my garden is my knees”
"The hardest things for me to raise in my garden are my knees" is a joke about old age and gardening. "The hardest thing to raise in my garden is my knees" was cited in print in…
“The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread”
"The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread/roll" is a jocular saying that appears on many collections of one-liners. The Washingtonian of 1982 (the Google…
“The Hawk” or “Hawkins” (strong cold winter wind)
Chicago's wind is called "Hawkins," or "The Hawk." The origin of the name is a mystery, but one thing is certain: it didn't originate in Chicago. Random House…
“The hay is in the barn” (football and running expression)
"The hay is in the barn" is a sports expression that means that preparations are over and the athlete (or team) is ready for the event. The expression first became popular among college…
“The heat index is somewhere between OMG and WTF”
"The heat index is somewhere between OMG (Oh My God! -- ed.) and WTF (What The Fuck? -- ed.)" -- that is to say, it's very hot -- is a saying that has been printed on many images.…
“The heels of the bread are to be eaten last. You eat them as punishment for not buying more bread”
Some people like the end of a loaf of bread (called the "heel"), but many people do not. This was posted on X/Twitter by Mike Primavera on March 2, 2023: "The heels of the bread are…
“The high for today was 54. The low was eating an entire batch of cookies”
A food joke starts with the weather -- "The high for today was..." The next line refers to unhealthy eating: "The low was..." The many forms of the saying have been printed on…
“The high for today was 75. The low was when I ate a whole sleeve of Thin Mints”
A food joke starts with the weather -- "The high for today was..." The next line refers to unhealthy eating: "The low was..." The many forms of the saying have been printed on…
“The high school music teacher told his students to read band books”
"Banned books" is sometimes punned as "band books." "Did John Philip Sousa read band books? #bannedbooks" was posted on Twitter on September 24, 2012. "The high…