"I’m not afraid to die...I’m afraid to live on my knees in a world run by lesser men who control the destiny of my children" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The…
A lawyer joke was posted on Twitter by Marf on December 23, 2016: [Interview room]Me: I'm not saying a word without my lawyer presentCop: You ARE the lawyerMe: So where's my present?!…
"I'm not saying I don't like you, I'm just saying I would unplug your life support to make a pot of coffee" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…
"I’m not saying I drink too much caffeine, but I do believe my body will keep moving 48 hours after my death" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I’m not…
The COVID-19 vaccines were developed within a year, and many people believed that there were microchips in the vaccines. Microsoft Corporation founder Bill Gates helped to develop and distribute…
"I’m not saying we should skip work today and drink margaritas and eat chips and salsa all day, but I’m not, not saying that either" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many…
A joke about work was posted on X/Twitter by @dad_hard on February 15, 2023: "I’m not super useful until I’ve had coffee, then I get jittery followed by a caffeine crash. At 11 I’m too…
"I'm not sure if I'm hungry, but I'm gonna eat anyway, just in case" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many images. "Can't decide if i'm…
Many people love garlic bread, and they believe that it can fix any meal. "Garlic bread fixes everything" was posted on X/Twitter by Nichole on May 1, 2010. " I'm pretty sure…
"I'm not good at push ups, pull ups, or sit ups. I'm pretty good at fuck ups though" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Im ok when it comes to sit…
"I'm now accepting invitations to get drunk on your patio. Book me early" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. There are several variations of the saying.…
A jocular statement on cancel culture was posted on Facebook by Chewy Smalls on March 2, 2021: "I’m offended by bills, can we cancel them!?Isn’t that how it works now?" Wikipedia:…
Many people who live on a quiet residential street don't like it when someone parks in front of their house (and who isn't coming to their house). The homeowner regards the space as…
Some diets have "cheat days" (such as a Friday or a birthday) where the dieter is allowed to go off the diet for that day. A joke is that some "dieters" take cheat years.…
How about protesting protests? "I’m organizing a protest to protest all the protests. Who’s ready for a good protest!" was posted on X/Twitter by The Lonesome Kicker on August 16,…
"Give me a ring" usually means a telephone ring and not a diamond ring, but there are jokes. "Planning to start a jewellery business. If you want to help, give me a ring" was…
Entry in progress -- B.P. TwitterBill Murray @BiIIMurrayI’m pretty sure that it’s easier to leave most street gangs than it is to cancel a membership to a gym.12:30 PM - 21 Dec 2017
Several jokes state that a podium is a product that a salesman can stand behind. However, you stand on a podium, and you stand behind a lectern. "It must really suck to be a podium salesman.…
"I'm ready for the rest of this week! I have my umbrella, my flip flops, my mittens, my suntan lotion, my winter coat, my sunglasses, my thermals, my iced tea and my hot chocolate!"…
Many people wish that money would fall from the sky and into their pockets. "i’m really hoping money falls from the sky this week or else i’m fucked 😂🤣" was posted on X/Twitter…