“The best throw of the dice is to throw them away” (gambling adage)
"The best throw of the dice is to throw them away" is a very old gambling adage that is still popularly cited. "The best throw upon the dice is to throw them away" was credited…
“Two choices: take it or leave it” (food menu joke)
"Today's Menu: Take it or Leave it" is a humorous saying that has been printed on many gift items, such as wall plaques and posters. The joke dates to at least 1944, when "take…
“The man who dies rich dies disgraced”
Andrew Carnegie (1835-1919) was a Scottish-American industrialist who was also one of the biggest philanthropists of the late 19th century. On a visit to Scotland in July 1887, Carnegie said…
Great Default
"Great Default" is a term coined and popularized by the economist Gary North, borrowing "great" from names such as the "Great Depression" and the "Great…
“Consumers are statistics; customers are people”
Stanley Marcus (1905-2002) was an executive of the Dallas (TX) luxury retail store Neiman Marcus from 1950 to 1976. Marcus's book, Quest for the Best (1979), contained "Marcus's…
“Don’t drink to drown your sorrows—sorrows know how to swim”
"Don't drink to drown your sorrows -- sorrows know how to swim" is a humorous saying that has been printed on many gift items, such as posters and bumper stickers. The "Ask Ann…
“You boys line up, alphabetically according to your height” (sports manager jocular speech)
"You boys line up, alphabetically according to your height" is nonsensical sports coach-speak -- a player line rarely can be both alphabetical and also by height. Ed Diddle (1895-1970), a…
“A house is made of walls and beams; a home is built with love and dreams”
William Arthur Ward (1921-1994) was a writer of much-quoted inspirational maxims. In the book, Thoughts of a Christian Optimist; The words of William Arthur Ward (1968), Ward wrote: "A house…
“A harp is a piano after taxes”
"A harp is a (grand) piano after taxes" is a jocular statement that has been included in many collections of one-line sayings about taxes. The saying has also been printed on T-shirts.…
“Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings”
Duffy's Tavern was a radio show from 1941 to 1951. Ed Gardner (1901-1963, and born in Astoria, NY) created the comedy series and spoke many of its most memorable lines. A newspaper review of…
“He who hesitates is not only lost, but several miles from the next exit”
"He who hesitates is lost" is a proverb that dates back to at least the 18th and 19th centuries. The proverb has had several jocular anti-proverb endings. "When driving, is it…
“One time a windshield wiper will work properly is when it’s holding a parking ticket”
Parking tickets are usually placed under a windshield wiper. "We're going to have to get rid of that windshield wiper on the car. I found another parking ticket in it today" was a…
“School is a building that has four walls—with tomorrow inside”
"School is a building that has four walls -- with tomorrow inside" is a frequently cited one-line saying about school. "What is a School?" is a eulogy that was written by Dan…
“You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard”
"You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard" is a jocular saying that has been included in "Murphy's Laws" collections and a frequently…
“You can’t get to the top by sitting on your bottom”
"You can't get to the top by sitting on your bottom" is a jocular saying that has been cited in print since at least 1954. The authorship of the saying is unknown. Google…
“If you can’t dance, don’t blame the dance floor”
"A bad workman blames his tools" is an old proverb that has many variations. "If you can't dance, don't blame (it on) the (dance) floor" is a modern version of the…
“Winning isn’t everything, but losing isn’t anything”
"Winning isn't everything, it's the only thing" is a popular American sports proverb, cited in print since at least 1948. "Winning isn't everything, but losing…
“If you can’t say something nice, become a reporter”
"If you can't say something nice, don't say nothing at all" is advice given to the character Thumper in the Disney animated movie Bambi (1942). The proverbial saying is older…
“A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works”
"A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works" was written by Bill Vaughan (1915-1977), a columnist who specialized in aphorisms, in September…
“Whoever said, ‘It’s not whether you win or lose that counts,’ probably lost”
Grantland Rice (1880-1954) wrote, "For when the One Great Scorer comes to write against your name; He marks -- not that you won or lost -- but how you played the Game." Many sports…