Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006. Now a Popeyes fast food restaurant on Google Maps.
Recent entries:
•“Since we can’t use those beer rings anymore, I’ve been choking turtles with my bare hands” (5/18)
•“So you’re telling me a crab ran this goon?” (5/18)
•“The best way to honor our fallen soldiers is to stop creating so many of them” (5/18)
•“The best way to honor our fallen soldiers is to stop letting politicians create so many of them” (5/18)
•Entry in progress—BP24 (5/18)
More new entries...
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Above, Big Apple Corner at 54th Street and Broadway in Manhattan. Google Maps. Stolen and missing, 2021-2024.
Above, John J. Fitz Gerald, from the Aug. 15, 1931, Binghamton (NY) Press, pg. 14.
Listen to Robert Emmerich introduce "The Big Apple," a hit song from 1937. Music written by Bob and performed by Tommy Dorsey's Clambake Seven with Bob on piano. Lyrics written by Buddy Bernier and sung by Edythe Wright. Audio provided by Dorothy Emmerich.
Also listen to a 1937 "The Big Apple" song by Ozzie Nelson and his Orchestra. See a 1929 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald and a 1931 photo of John J. Fitz Gerald.
This site is edited by Barry Popik. These are the Cookies and Privacy Policies.
“Friends don’t let friends play in the snow alone”
“Snow hair, don’t care”
“Snowy hair, don’t care”
“Ski hair, don’t care”
“Jet ski hair, don’t care”
“Hockey hair, don’t care”
“Biker hair, don’t care”
“Bike hair, don’t care”
Rabbi Hole (rabbi + rabbit hole)
“Winter: My new excuse for drinking more coffee”
“You have to pay taxes so they protect you from what they’ll do to you if you don’t pay taxes”
“Snow is not a word, but an acronym for S-hit, N-o, O-ne, W-ants”
“Snow: Shit No One Wants”
“What do you call a gay French bread?” (NSFW riddle)
“You can accidentally make a human life, but not a pizza”
“You can accidentally make a baby, but you can’t accidentally make fries”
“You can accidentally make a person, but you can’t accidentally make a pizza”
“You can accidentally make a baby, but you can’t accidentally make a pizza”
“You can accidentally make a baby, but you can’t accidentally make food”
“You can accidentally make a baby, but you can’t accidentally make a crème brûlée”
“You can accidentally make a baby, but you can’t accidentally make a soufflé”
“You can accidentally make a baby, but you can’t accidentally make a sandwich”
“You can accidentally make a baby, but you can’t accidentally make a cake”
“You can accidentally make a baby, but you can’t accidentally bake a cake”
“My alone time with coffee is for your safety”
“My alone time with coffee is for everyone’s safety”
“My alone time is for your safety”
“My alone time is for everyone’s safety”
“My alone time is sometimes for your safety”
“The biggest lie ever told is any voicemail greeting that says ‘sorry I missed your call’”
“Mimosas are dangerous as f*ck. One minute you’re eating breakfast…”
“Mimosas are dangerous because they taste like juice and then you’re blacked out”
“Mimosas are scary because they taste like juice and then you can’t walk”
“If you’re looking for a husband, Tinder is the place to be! All kinds of husbands are on there…”
“Never trust someone who pours milk in their bowl before the cereal”
“Never trust a person who pours the milk before pouring the cereal”
“Is it called Dollar General because things are generally a dollar, but not always?”
“I do whatever I can to fight poverty. Only the other day I punched a tramp”
“King Arthur measures the size of his omelettes using his eggs caliper”
“‘Did you eat?’ has to be one of the most romantic questions ever”
“‘Did u eat?’ has to be one of the most romantic questions ever”
Conservatoid (conservative + -oid)
“Our trip to the Big Apple” (The Fairly Oddparents episode, 2011)
Big Apple Ranch (country-western dance lesson and party, 1997-present)
“Liberty Guns Beer Tits” (LGBT)
“Liberty Guns Beer Titties” (LGBT)
“Liquor Guns Bacon Tits” (LGBT)
“Big Apple” in the media
Big Apple logo for New York Cares (1987-present)
Big Apple logo for Javits Center (1985-present)
Big Apple (pachinko parlors in Japan, 2000?-present)
“The Winter Olympics: Letting white people win at sports no one else can afford to learn”
“Sex is my cardio. Which probably explains why I’m fat”
“Sex counts as cardio”
“Teacher: There are two words I don’t allow in my class. One is gross and the other is cool” (joke)
World Epstein Forum (World Economic Forum or WEF nickname)
“Buying groceries without food stamps should boost your credit score”
“Buying groceries with NO foodstamps should help boost ya credit score”
“Cranberry juice tastes like it doesn’t want to be wet”
“Cranberry juice tastes like it wants to be alcohol but it’s too shy”
“Cranberry juice tastes like it doesn’t wanna be wet”
“Big Apple” on websites
The Big Apple (bar in Ballyforan, Ireland, 2003?-present)
“Pastrami implies the existence of presentrami and futurerami”
“Pastrami implies the existence of presentrami and futurami”
“Pastrami is known as presentrami when it’s made and futurerami when they plan on making it”
“I wouldn’t say I’m a coffee addict. I prefer the term ‘exceptionally caffeine absorbent’”
“‘Addict’ makes it sound so negative. Let’s just say I have a high coffee absorbency rate”
“‘Your bill is ready to view’ well I’m not ready to view it”
“I hate it when I eat the last bite but didn’t notice it was the last bite…”
Fedtifa (federal government + Antifa)
Fed Bois or Fedbois (federal government + boys)
“Nice try, fed”
“Nice try, fed boi” (“Nice try, fedboi”)
“Nice try, fed boy” (“Nice try, fedboy”)
“What’s yellow and white and throws itself off the edge of the dining table?”/“A lemming meringue.”
“When life gives you lemmings, make lemming meringue pie”
“My dessert just threw itself off the table. It was a lemming meringue pie”
“It’s called a meme. It’s like a little digital seed of truth…”
“It’s called a meme. It’s like an inside joke, but for people that ain’t got no friends”
Big Apple Innovation Awards (LISC NY, 2003-present)
“I am officially ‘they don’t make music like this no more’ years old”
Big Apple Music Awards (2007-2022)
“Is the left called the left because they are never right?”
“The left is called the ‘left’ because they’re NEVER RIGHT!!”
“They’re called the left because they’re never right”
“My local bakery accused me of stealing all their yeast. They can’t prove anything”
“I stole yeast from the local bakery. They can’t prove a thing”
“Snow happens, hot chocolate helps”
“Coffee tastes better when you’re wearing a cardigan”
“Coffee tastes better when you’re wearing a sweater”
“At this point, I only trust people who have been canceled, banned, deleted or have been in fb jail”
“Laughing at memes you’ve seen before for friends is faking orgasms of the digital era”
“My hobbies include eating and thinking about the next time I will be eating”
“My hobbies include eating and also thinking about the next time I will be eating”
“Libertarians are like Greek gods. They fight with each other all the time and nobody believes in them”
“Sometimes I read a text and think, what a psycho. Then I press send”
“Calories in one pistachio: 4. Calories burned opening one pistachio: 3,146. Take that, kale”
“Instead of sending poor countries money, shouldn’t we be telling them to raise their minimum wage?”
“Winter means double the coffee”