A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006. Now a Popeyes fast food restaurant on Google Maps.

Recent entries:
“Shitposting implies the existence of pissposting” (6/12)
“What do you call a wheel of cheese that you throw to someone else?”/“A fris-brie.” (6/12)
“Shitposting implies the existence of pissposting and shartposting” (6/12)
“Shitposting implies the existence of pissposting, sweatposting, spitposting, cumposting, etc.” (6/12)
“There was a fire drill at IKEA today. We all assembled in the car park” (6/12)
More new entries...

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OAMC (Once-A-Month Cooking)

OANonsense (One America News Network or OANN nickname)

"Oat milk is just oatmeal without the pulp"

"Oat milk is just pulp free oatmeal"

"Oatmeal is basically bread soup"

"Oatmeal is just breakfast rice"

"Oatmeal raisin cookies are just catfish chocolate chip cookies"

"Oatmeal raisin cookies are the catfish of cookies"

"Oatmeal raisin cookies are the original catfish"

"Oatmeal raisin cookies taste better the older you get"

"Oatmilk latte is just coffee-flavored pulp-free oatmeal in a sippy cup"

OBC (Original Broadway Cast)

OBCR (Original Broadway Cast Recording)

"Obedience is doing what you are told, regardless of what is right"

"Obedience is not patriotism"

"Obedience is what gives tyrants their power"

"Obesity is probably the only disease where a run for the cure will actually cure it"

"Obesity -- When you buy a hula-hoop and it fits you"

"Obey gravity. It's the law"

"Obey the sign or pay the fine"

Obie Award

"Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear" (safety warning)

Oblication (obligation + vacation)

Oblivobesity (obliviousness + obesity)

Obscene Profit Timeout (commercial)

Obsessive Coffee Disorder (OCD)

"Obstacles are things a person sees when he takes his eyes off his goal"

Occupier (Occupy Wall Street participant)

Occupocalypse (Occupy Wall Street + apocalypse)

Occutard (Occupy Wall Street + retard)

"OCD -- Obsessive Cycling Disorder"

Ocean Meat (seafood)

OCR (Original Cast Recording)

Octaper (October + taper)

Octemburary (fictional month)

Octo-Beer-Fest (Octoberfest + beer)

Octobeerfest (Octoberfest + beer)

"October is my favorite time of year to finally turn the central air off and turn the heat on..."

October Surprise

Odessa (summary)

Odessan (inhabitant of Odessa)

"Oedipus and Midas walk into a bar..." (bar joke)

"Oedipus, Aphrodite and Midas walk into a bar..." (bar joke)

"Of all my body parts, my eyes get the most exercise, I do at least a thousand eye rolls every day"

"Of all the martial arts, karaoke inflicts the most pain"

"Of all the things I learned in grade school, how to avoid cooties was the last I expected to use"

"Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my metabolism the most"

"Of all the things that 'taste like chicken', eggs are ironically not one of them"

"Of all the things that taste like chicken, it's weird that eggs are not one of them"

"Of all the utensils invented to eat rice with, how did two sticks win?"

"Of course all scientists agree, when you censor the ones who don't"

"Of course carrot cake is healthy, 60% of its name contains carrot"

"Of course I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice"

"Of course it's heavy, that's why they call it weight"

"Of course size matters. No one likes a small pizza"

"Of course women don't work as hard as men. They get it right the first time"

"Of course you can trust me. Not alone with cake, but otherwise"

Off Book

Off-Off Broadway

"Off the reservation"

"Off the table" (something non-negotiable)

Off Topic: Charles Gillett on Conventions

Off-Track Betting (OTB) & "Go, Baby, Go!"

"Offense sells tickets, but defense wins championships"

Office Cheapo (Office Depot nickname)

Office Despot (Office Depot nickname)

"Office sweet office"

"Officer, why are you crying while writing me a ticket?"/"It's a moving violation."

Official Bird of New York City (middle finger; pigeon)

Officialdom

"Often in error, but never in doubt" ("Often wrong, but never in doubt")

"Oh beautiful for spaceship skies" ("America the Beautiful" mondegreen)

"Oh Friday! Let me hug u!"

"Oh Friday, let me hug you"

"Oh good, an email from every single store or website I've ever bought something from"

"Oh, I'm glad I'm not a turkey"

"Oh kale no"

"Oh my God, a talking muffin!" (joke)

"Oh my God, a talking sausage!" (joke)

"Oh my God, how can you drink straight orange juice first thing in the morning?"

"Oh my gourd, I love fall"

Oh Shoot, Here Again (Occupational Safety & Health Administration or OSHA nickname)

"Oh sweet Jesus. Oh sour Jesus. Oh BBQ Jesus. Oh cool ranch Jesus. Oh Doritos locos tacos Jesus"

"Oh, the weather outside is frightful, but the wine is so delightful"

"Oh, we must be in Pasadena!"

"Oh you don't have a valentine on valentine's day? Some people don't even have a groundhog on groundhogs day"

"Oh, you got a sticker for voting? A banana gets a sticker for being a banana"

"Oh, you got a sticker for voting? That's cool. A banana gets a sticker for being a banana"

"Oh, you're an anarchist? Then solve every single problem in the world right now"

"Oh, you're straight? Well, so is spaghetti until it gets hot and wet"

Ohio: "Where’s Engagement, Ohio?"/"Somewhere between Dayton and Marion."

Oil Bowl (Maskat Oil Bowl at Wichita Falls)

Oilpocalypse (oil + apocalypse)

OJ (orange juice)

O.K. Bolt (tapioca pudding)

"'OK Boomer,' said the currant to the elderberry"

"OK, but first cocktails"

"OK, but first coffee"

"OK, but first iced coffee"

"OK" Sign (Ballantine Beer & Pizza Box Chef use)

"Ok, so if the Corona virus isn't about beer, why do I keep hearing about cases of it?"

OK-to-beer-fest (Oktoberfest)

"Okey-dokey, artichokey" ("Okie-dokie, artichokie")

"Okey dokey" ("Okie dokie"); "Okey doke"

Oklahoma: Diet Texas (nickname)

Oklahoma Guarantee

Oklahoma Oysters

Okonomiyaki (Japanese Pizza)

Okrahoma (Oklahoma nickname)

Okratini (Okra + Martini)

Okto-Beer-Fest (Oktoberfest + beer)

Oktobeerfest (Oktoberfest + beer)

OLC (Original London Cast)

OLCR (Original London Cast Recording)

"Old accountants never die -- they just lose their balance"

"Old bankers never die -- they just lose interest"

"Old bowlers never die — they just end up in the gutter"

"Old card players never die -- they just shuffle away"

Old College Try

"Old cooks never die, they just get deranged"

"Old deans never die—they just lose their faculties"

"Old doughnut makers never die, they just get tired of the whole business"

"Old fishermen never die -- they just lose their bobbers"

"Old fishermen never die -- they just smell that way"

"Old frisbee players never die -- they just end up on the roof"

Old Glory Corner (Fifth Avenue and 16th Street)

"Old golfers never die -- they just lose their balls"

"Old golfers never die -- they just lose their drive"

"'Old' is when your wife says, 'Let's go upstairs and make love'" (joke)

"Old Italian chefs never die -- they're just put out to pasta"

"Old journalists never die, they just get de-pressed"

Old Lady of 43rd Street (New York Times nickname)

"Old lawyers never die -- they just lose their appeal"

"Old MacDonald had a robot farm, AI AI O"

"Old MacDonald had a server farm, AI AI O"

"Old MacDonald had computers do everything for him, AI AI O"

Old Maid (unpopped corn kernel)

"Old math teachers never die -- they just become irrational"

"Old math teachers never die -- they just reduce to lowest terms"

"Old mathematicians never die -- they just lose some of their functions"

"Old money whispers, new money shouts"

"Old people shouldn't eat health foods; they need all the preservatives they can get"

"Old skiers never die -- they just go downhill"

"Old slaves were in chains. New slaves are in denial"

"Old software engineers never die -- they just reboot"

Old Sparky (electric chair)

Old Swampy (New Orleans nickname)

"Old teachers never die -- they just lose their class"

"Old ways won't open new doors"

Old World Order (old + New World Order): OWO

Old World Wine

Old York Times (New York Times nickname)

Oldest Profession (prostitution)

Oldest Town in Texas (Nacogdoches nickname)

"Oldie but goodie"

Oleander City (Galveston nickname)

Oligarch's Erection (432 Park Avenue)

"Olive Garden is the Italian version of Applebee’s"

"Olive Garden waitress asks me to "say when" and begins to grate parmesan on my salad..."

Olive Gardener (Olive Garden customer or employee)

"Olive oil is a fruit juice"

Olive Oil Sommelier (Oleologist)

"Olive, the other reindeer"

"Olive who?/"Olive you!" (knock-knock joke)

"Olives matter"

"Olympia, WA" (1995) ("52nd and Broadway" lyric)

Olympics (NYC 2012), the Big Apple, and the "Public Advocate" disgrace

OMAD (One Meal A Day)

"Omelets are just egg quesadillas"

"Omelettes are just egg quesadillas"

"Omicron must come from the Omicrônne region of France, otherwise it's just sparkling covid"

Omnomymous (nom nom + anonymous)

Omnomynous (nom nom + anonymous)

"On a New York City subway you get fined for spitting, but you can throw up for nothing"

"On a slow boat to China" (a long transport)

"On any given Sunday" ("On any given Saturday")

"On Broadway" (1963)

"On earth, as it is in Austin"

"On economics tests, the questions are the same every year -- only the answers change"

"On Fridays, I prefer my espresso in a martini"

"On Line" (not "in line")

"On March 14, 1883 Karl Marx made his most important contribution to mankind... He died"

"On Monday mornings I am dedicated to the proposition that all men are created jerks"

"On Mondays, I feel like I need coffee injected directly into my veins"

"On Mondays, I feel like I need coffee injected directly into my veins"

"On New Years Eve, an old Irish tradition is to open your door at midnight and let the old year out"

"On Saturday mornings, I like to wake up slow and sit on the couch having coffee for 37 hours"

"On Saturdays we wear pajamas"

"On Sunday mornings, I like to wake up slow and sit on the couch having coffee for 37 hours"

"On Sundays, my coffee is recreational. As opposed to weekdays, when it's medicinal"

"On Thanksgiving black ppl don't eat breakfast. We starve until da food ready"

"On Thanksgiving country folks don’t eat breakfast. We starve until the food is ready"

"On Thanksgiving Day all over America, families sit down to dinner at the same moment — halftime"

"On Thanksgiving Day all over America, families sit down to dinner at the same moment—halftime"

"On Thanksgiving Hispanics don't eat breakfast. We starve until da food ready"

"On Thanksgiving we don't eat breakfast. We starve until the food is ready"

"On Thanksgiving, what's always in the middle of the table?"/"The letter B."

"On the 6" (1999) & "Jenny from the Block" (2002)

"On the 8th day God created Texas"

On the Border by the Sea (Brownsville slogan)

"On the bright side, my coffee will never get cold in hell"

"On the eighth day God created coffee so that people like me could experience the other seven days"

"On the fence"

"On the first day of Covid my true love coughed on me"

"On the internet you can be whoever you want. It's strange that so many people choose to be stupid"

"On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key"

"On the money"

"On the one hand, fireworks are a lot of fun. On the other hand, I have only two fingers"

"On the other side of fear lies freedom"

On the Rocks (served over ice)

"On the same page" (teamwork saying)

"On the table" (something negotiable or for discussion)

"On the wagon" ("Off the wagon")

"On this site in 1897, nothing happened"

"On top of spaghetti all covered with cheese..."

"On top of the News, ahead of the Times" (New York Newsday slogan)

"On what charge was the guy arrested for rearranging his dinner table?"/"Dish-orderly conduct."

"On what kind of ships do students study?"/"Scholarships."

ONAN (One America News Network or OANN nickname)

"Once a billionaire, always a billionaire"

"Once a Dodger, Always a Dodger"

"Once a Marine, always a Marine"

"Once I got a job, I realized mom was right. We do have food at home"

"Once I got a job I realized my mom was right, we did have food at home"

"Once I started spending my own money, I realized mom was right. We do got food at home"

"Once I started spending my own money, I realized mom was right. We do have food at home"

"Once is happenstance; twice is coincidence; the third time it's enemy action"

"Once they see you doing better without them, that's when they want you back"

"Once upon a time, all food was organic"

"Once upon a time, there was an ox..." (oxtail joke)

"Once weapons were manufactured to fight war, but now war is manufactured to sell weapons"

"Once weapons were manufactured to fight wars. Now wars are manufactured to sell weapons"

"Once you accept the fact that queso and margaritas taste better than being skinny, the second half of your life begins"

"Once you are awake, it's hard to go back to sheep"

"Once you are in Texas it seems to take forever to get out, and some people never make it"

"Once you awake, it's hard to go back to sheep"

"Once you get Florida sand in your shoes, you never want to leave"

"Once you get rid of integrity, the rest is a piece of cake" (J.R. on Dallas tv series)

"Once you go craft, you never go back" (craft beer adage)

"Once you lick frosting off a cupcake, it becomes a muffin"

"Once you realize you don't need a special occasion to buy cake, a second part of your life begins"

"Once you realize there are no calories listed on a bottle of wine, life is a lot more tolerable"

"Once you realize there are no calories listed on a bottle of wine, the rest of your life begins"

"Once you start scooping salsa instead of just dipping salsa, you’re officially an adult"

"Once you understand that the 'solutions' aren't created to solve the 'problems'..."

"Once you wake up, it's hard to go back to sheep"

"Once your neighbor cuts their grass, you have 48 hours to respond"

"Once your neighbor cuts their grass, you have 72 hours to respond"

"Once you're over the hill, you begin to pick up speed"

"Once you've heard one bagpipe tune, you've heard them both"

"Once you've seen one rugby joke, you've seen a maul"

"'Onced' and 'twiced' are words"

One America Nonsense Network (One America News Network or OANN nickname)

One-Armed Economist (who doesn't say "on the other hand")

One Armed Scissor (vodka and Red Bull)

"One Asian, in the vestibule" (Pledge of Allegiance mondegreen)

"One 'aw, shit' wipes out a thousand 'attaboys'"

"One bite means a binge"

"One book that always has a sad ending is a check book"

One Chatham Square (beef stew)

One Chatham Square (beef stew)

"One client at a time" (Morgan Stanley)

"One day I wanna be 'Fridge in the garage' successful"

"One day I want to be 'Let’s Just Take My Helicopter' rich"

"One day I'll learn how to motivate myself. For now, there's coffee"

"One day, I'll solve my problems with maturity. Today. it's with alcohol"

"One day...I'm gonna make the onions cry"

"One day in 2033, we shall witness the rise of THE QUARANTEENS"

"One day many will hang their heads in shame when they realize the evil they defended..."

"One day of practice is like one day of clean living. It ain't gonna help"

"One day or day one. You decide"

"One day someone is gonna love me and I will stop sharing memes"

"One day someone will love me and I will stop sharing memes and you all will miss me"

"One day someone will love me and I will stop sharing memes. Y'all will miss me"

"One day someone will love you, and you will stop sharing memes"

"One day you will be dead and you won’t be able to play on your phone so..."

"One day YouTube, Facebook and Twitter will join together and be called YouTwitFace"

"One does not simply have 'one' pancake"

"One finds limits by pushing them"

One-Food Wonder

"One for the money, two for the show, three to make ready, and four to go"

"One from column A, one from column B" (Chinese menu ordering)

"One game doesn't define a season"

"One good thing about apples is that they don’t make you go through a lot of drama..."

"One great thing about Louisiana heat: You can guarantee no one is waiting in your back seat"

"One great thing about Texas heat: You can guarantee no one is waiting in your back seat"

One-Hour Fuel (dry weeds and grass)

"One."/"How many time travelers does it take to ruin a joke?"

"One impeachment is bad, but two impeachments -- that’s just unpresidented"

"One is scared and the other is glad of it"

"One knee equals two feet" (football saying)

"One large mocha Xanax vodka latte with whipped cream and Valium sprinkles please"

"One man's chicken shit is another man's chicken salad"

"One man's mob is another man's democracy"

"One man's pork is another man's bacon"

"One man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter"

"One minute you are young and fun and the next minute you're excited about a crockpot"

"One minute, you're young and fun. And the next, you're turning down the car stereo to see better"

"One minute you're young and fun and the next minute you're excited about a new vacuum"

"One minute you're young and fun and the next minute you're excited about an air fryer"

"One more drink and I'd have been under the host!"

"One more week until I let a professional football team determine my mood for the next four months"

"One naked individual" (Pledge of Allegiance mondegreen)

"One nation and a vegetable" (Pledge of Allegiance mondegreen)

"One nation gone under" (joke on "One nation under God")

"One nation in a dirigible" (Pledge of Allegiance mondegreen)

"One nation, invisible" (Pledge of Allegiance mondegreen)

"One nation, under a fraud, with tyranny and injustice for all"

"One Nation Under CCTV"

"One nation, under fraud"

"One nation, under fraud, completely visible, with spying on and lying to all"

"One nation, under fraud, with tyranny and injustice for all"

"One nation, under guard, invisible" (Pledge of Allegiance mondegreen)

"One nuclear bomb can ruin your whole day"

"One nuclear bomb can spoil your whole day"

"One of my biggest fears is that I'll marry into a family that does 5Ks on holidays"

"One of my chief regrets is that I couldn't sit in the audience and watch me act"

"One of my waffles is crazier than the other. It's my alter Eggo"

"One of my worst traits is my core belief that I deserve a little $6 coffee every time I run a mildly unpleasant errand"

"One of the advantages bowling has over golf is that you seldom lose a bowling ball"

"One of the best things about being a conspiracy theorist is that you don't end up with myocarditis"

"One of the great things about cooking your own food is the certainty that any hair in it is yours"

"One of the greatest mistakes in American history was allowing government to educate our children"

"One of the greatest prisons people live in is the fear of what other people think"

"One of the greatest sources of energy is pride in what we are doing"

"One of the innumerable noble things that bacon will do for humanity is cover up the taste of salad"

"One of the weirdest mainstream political beliefs is that secretive government agencies..."

"One of the worst jobs in the world is to be a fruit stand vendor in action movie"

"One of these days, is none of these days"

"One-One was a racehorse..." (tongue twister)

One PP or Puzzle Palace (One Police Plaza)

"One reason why I don't drink is because I wish to know when I am having a good time"

"One right and honest definition of business is mutual helpfulness"

"One Riot -- One Ranger" (Texas Rangers)

"One shot, meat in the pot" (hunting saying)

"One son went to sea and one became vice president; neither was ever heard of again"

"One tectonic plate bumped into another and said, 'Sorry, my fault'"

"One Tequila, Two Tequila, Three Tequila, Floor!"

"One test is worth a thousand expert opinions"

"One thing my dog and I have in common is that we never want me to go to work"

"One thing my dogs and I have in common is that we never want me to go to work"

"One thing that internet taught me is that stupidity is international"

"One thing that the internet has taught me is that stupidity is international"

"One thing the internet taught me is that stupidity is international"

"One thing you can give and still keep is your word"

"One time a windshield wiper will work properly is when it's holding a parking ticket"

"One time my kid’s elementary school went 6 days in a row without a fundraiser"

"One useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress"

"One week until I let a college football team determine my mood for the next 4 months"

One World Government (OWG)

Onek ("fork" with one prong/tine)

Oneonta: Cold Cheese Pizza (or "Oneonta slice")

Oneonta Slice (cold cheese pizza, invented in Oneonta, NY)

"One's gotta have good credit. That’s why it’s called a significant other (sign-if-I-can't)"

Onigiri (Japanese rice ball)

Onioissant (onigiri + croissant)

"Onion and garlic powder go on everything"

"Onion powder and garlic powder go on everything"

Onion Ring Tower (Towering Onion Rings)

"Onion rings and french fries are deep fried binary"

"Onion rings are a poor man's calamari"

"Onion rings are just ghetto calamari"

"Onion rings are just vegan calamari"

"Onion rings are just vegetarian calamari"

"Onion rings are vegetable donuts"

"Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time"

"Onions are the only vegetables that fight back"

"Onions force you to mourn their death"

"Online flirting is all fun and games until someone buys a plane ticket"

"Only a buzzard feeds on its friends"

"Only a fool argues with a skunk, a mule, or a cook"

"Only a fool can be happy to show off a pass for things he used to do without a pass"

"Only a fool would give up a weapon in order for the government to protect them..."

"Only a life lived in the service to others is worth living"

"Only a matter of time before my electric bill asks me to select a tip amount"

"Only a surfer knows the feeling"

"Only a weirdough doesn't like pizza"

"Only accountants can save the world -- through peace, goodwill and reconciliations"

"Only add soy sauce when the chef is standing upright. Never Kikkoman when he's down"

"Only an idiot disarms himself and expects criminals to do the same"

"Only an idiot disarms himself, and thinks criminals will do the same"

"Only an idiot disarms themselves, and thinks the criminal will do the same"

"Only angry people win football games"

"Only angry people win football games"

"Only as the power of persuasion replaces the persuasion of power can collective bargaining..."

Only Assholes News Network (One America News Network or OANN nickname)

Only city with a foreign policy (politicians visiting Israel and Puerto Rico)

"Only dead fish go with the flow"

"Only government can take perfectly good paper, cover it with perfectly good ink..."

"Only government is incompetent enough to be in the business of forcibly extracting money..."

"Only in America can you get arrested for feeding the homeless & be sentenced to community service"

Only in New York

"Only in New York" (2002)

"Only newcomers and fools predict the weather in Texas"

"Only one thing is worse than an almoster and that is a never tryer"

"Only one thing is worser than an almoster and that is a never tryer"

"Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone"

"Only Robinson Crusoe had all his work done by Friday"

"Only the empire should have guns"

"Only the feeblest of men take jobs in the government"

"Only the government is incompetent enough to be in the business of stealing money..."

Only the little people pay taxes (attributed to Leona Helmsley)

"Only the paranoid survive" (internet adage)

Only the Strong Survive (Bronx, Brooklyn, or NYC slogan)

"Only the weakest of males want to physically compete with women. Only the weakest of intellect celebrate them"

"Only thing left on my debit card is my name and expiration date"

"Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly"

"Only those who have something to hide will work relentlessly to censor those who speak the truth"

"Only two things that money can't buy -- that's true love and homegrown tomatoes"

"Only when you can see through the illusion, can you be part of the solution"

"OnlyCoffee instead of OnlyFans. Just me flicking beans all day"

"OnlyFans implies the existence of OnlyCritics"

"OnlyFans implies the existence of OnlyFoes"

"OnlyFans implies the existence of OnlyHaters"

"OnlyFans is the Etsy of porn"

"Onward Thru the Fog" or "Onward Through the Fog" (Oat Willie's of Austin)

OOBC (Original Off-Broadway Cast)

OOBCR (Original Off-Broadway Cast Recording)

OOPS (United Parcel Service or UPS nickname)

Op-Ed (opposite editorial)

"Open a can of worms" (idiom)

"Open box before eating pizza" (pizza box instructions)

"Open faced sandwiches are just fancy toast"

Open House New York

"Open Mike Night sounded fun, but then we got to the morgue"

"Open the garage, here comes the car!" (opening a child's mouth for food)

"Open the hangar, here comes the airplane!" (opening a child's mouth for food)

"Open the oven, take a look; first to complain is next week's cook"

"Open the tunnel, here comes the train!" (opening a child's mouth for food)

"Open your eyes. The media lies"

"Open your eyes to the media lies"

"Opening a new funeral parlor can be quite an undertaking"

"Opera is basically screaming in cursive"

"Opera is just screaming music in cursive"

"Opera is just yelling in cursive"

"Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings"

Operation American Spring (#AmericanSpring)

Operation Chaos

Operation Twist (Operation Nudge)

OpEx (Operational Expenditure)

"Opinions are like assholes -- everybody's got one"

"Opinions are like orgasms -- mine matters most, and I don't care if you have one"

Opiniotainment (opinion + entertainment)

Opinutainment (opinion + education + entertainment)

OPM (Other People's Money)

"Opportunities always look bigger going than coming"

"Trading opportunities are like buses; if you miss one, another will come along soon"

"Opportunities are like sunrises. If you wait too long, you miss them"

"Opportunities, like eggs, come one at a time"

"Opportunities, like eggs, must be hatched when they are fresh"

"Opportunity does not knock, it presents itself when you beat down the door"

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it's dressed in overalls and looks like work"

"Opportunity knocks only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell"

"Opportunity never knocks twice"

"Optimistic people want to hear the bad news first. Realists just start drinking"

"Optometrists live longer because they dilate"

Orange County (orange soda and vanilla ice cream)

"Orange Crush is a poor man's Sunkist"

Orange Heads or Orangeheads (UT Longhorns fans)

"Orange in the Apple" (Syracuse University Orange slogan in the Big Apple)

"Orange juice got the nickname 'OJ,' but apple juice didn't get the nickname 'AJ'"

Orange Julius & Orange Juice Gulch

"Orange you glad I didn't say banana?" (knock-knock joke)

"Oranges are pre-sliced by nature"

Orchid Show (New York Botanical Garden)

"Order synonym rolls. They have fewer calories than cinnamon rolls and taste the same"

Order Sniping (prank)

"Ordered some German food off the internet. The sauerkraut has arrived but the wurst is yet to come"

"Ordered stuff using my donor card instead of my debit card. Cost me an arm and a leg"

Oregon, Things Look Different Here (Oregon slogan)

Oregon, We Love Dreamers (Oregon slogan)

Oregon, You're More Than Welcome (Oregon slogan)

Oregonian (inhabitant of Oregon)

"Oregonians don't tan, they rust"

Oregroanian (The Oregonian newspaper nickname)

Orejas (Mexican pastry "ears")

Oreo

"Oreos are just American macarons"

"Oreos are just sugar burgers"

"Oreos are the peasant version of macarons"

"Oreos are the poor man's macarons"

"Pretty words are not always true, and true words are not always pretty"

"Organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble"

Organic Tanking

Organized Team Activity (OTA)

Orient Express or International Line (7 train)

"Origami Bank has folded. Sumo Bank has gone belly up. Bonsai Bank plans to cut back branches"

"Origami is the new woodworking"

Origin of "Badger" (Wisconsin nickname)

Origin of “Boomer”/"Sooner" (Oklahoma nickname) - summary

Origin of "Buckeye" (Ohio nickname)

Origin of "Canuck" ("Johnny Canuck") - summary

Origin of "Gopher" (Minnesota nickname)

Origin of "Hawkeye" (Iowa nickname)

Origin of "Hoosier" (Indiana nickname)

Origin of “Jayhawk” (Kansas nickname) - summary

Origin of "Sucker" (Illinois nickname)

Origin of “Tar Heel” (North Carolina nickname) - summary

Origin of "Wolverine" (Michigan nickname)

Original New York Seltzer (from California)

Original Six (six oldest NHL teams)

Orphan Train

Widows and Orphans (newspaper terminology)

"Orthodontists are going on strike. Brace yourself!"

"Orthodontists are going on strike. Brace yourselves!"

"Orwell called them thought police. Big Tech calls them fact checkers"

"Orzo is pasta masquerading as rice. Risotto is rice masquerading as pasta"

Oscar (Academy Award)

Oscars of Architecture (Architizer's A+ Awards)

Oscars of Street Food (Vendy Awards nickname)

Oscars of the East Coast (Met Gala nickname)

Oscars of the Plus Industry (Full Figured Fashion Week nickname)

Osgood Pie (Oh-So-Good Pie; Allgood Pie)

"Ossifer, I'm sotally tober!" (joke on "Officer, I'm totally sober!")

OST (Original Sound Track)

Ostionera (Ostioneria)

Ostrich Economics

Oswego: Starch City (nickname)

Othello (chocolate-covered sponge cake)

"Other states were carved or born, Texas grew from hide and horn" (Berta Hart Nance)

"Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you like the play?"

OTM (Other Than Mexican)

"Otter Pops are just boneless popsicles"

Otto (football linebacker position)

"Our 3-year-old said she wanted a spirit guest. 3 exorcisms later, we realized she wanted asparagus"

"Our aim is to keep this restroom clean. Your aim will help" (men's restroom sign)

"Our cleaning lady just called and told us she will be working from home"

"Our coffee is an experience that chalk is unable to convey" (chalkboard sign)

"Our comedies are not to be laughed at"

"Our Constitution protects aliens, drunks and United States senators"

"Our credit manager is Helen Waite. If you want credit, go to Helen Waite."

"Our days are happier when we give people a bit of our heart rather than a piece of our mind"

"Our dreams cannot fit in their ballot boxes"

"Our dreams don't fit in ballot boxes"

"Our dreams don't fit in their ballot boxes"

"Our dreams don't fit in your ballot boxes"

"Our dreams will never fit in their ballot boxes"

"Our dreams will never fit into their ballot boxes"

"Our dreams won't fit in ballot boxes"

"Our earth is not overpopulated, our government is"

"Our earth is not overpopulated, the government is"

"Our Father, who art in heaven, Harold be thy name..." (Lord's Prayer mondegreen)

"Our Father, who art in heaven, Howard be thy name..." (Lord's Prayer mondegreen)

"Our fear is their power"

"Our five senses are incomplete without the sixth -- a sense of humor"

"Our flag does not fly because the wind moves it. It flies with the last breath of each soldier..."

"Our food is fresh. Our customers are spoiled." (FreshDirect)

"Our Founding Fathers weren't concerned with specific types of firearms..."

"Our freedom doesn't end where your fear begins"

"Our friendship is like a cup of tea...a special blend of you and me"

"Our house is lived in, it's not for show. If you don't like the mess, you know where to go"

Our Lady of New York

"Our Lager, which art in barrels, hallowed be thy drink..."

"Our leaders are not incompetent. They’re not stupid either. They’re communists. You know that, right?"

"Our leaders aren't stupid. They're not incompetent either. They're traitors. You know that, right?"

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter"

"Our maintenance guy lost his legs on the job. Now he’s just a handyman"

"Our most important assets go home every night" (employee-intensive business slogan)

"Our office just got a new conference table -- it sleeps 16"

"Our phones fall, we panic. Our friends fall, we laugh"

"Our printing press is the internet. Our coffee houses are social networks"

"Our restaurant’s snails are world-famous."/"I know, one of them’s just been serving me."

"Our rights don't end where your fear begins"

"Our rights don't end where your fears begin"

Our Savior Has Arrived (Occupational Safety & Health Administration or OSHA nickname)

"Our tongue sandwiches speak for themselves" (deli/restaurant sign)

"Our town is so small we don't have a town drunk, so we all take turns"

"Our trip to the Big Apple" (The Fairly Oddparents episode, 2011)

"Out in left field" ("Out of left field")

"Out like a fat kid in dodgeball"

"Out of all the martial arts, karaoke inflicts the most pain"

"Out of my mind -- back in five minutes" (office door sign)

Out-of-Pocket Expenses

"Out of the 26 letters, only E got presents for Christmas. The other letters were not-E"

"Out of the mouths of babes does often come cereal"

"Out to lunch"

"Out where the buses don't run"

"Out with the old, in with the new. Cheers to the future and all that we do"

"Outback Steakhouse is a poor man's LongHorn Steakhouse"

"Outback Steakhouse is poor man's Texas Roadhouse"

Outdoor Capital of Texas (Buda nickname)

Outer Boroughs

OuterB or Outerb (Outer Borough)

Outhouse Steakback (Outback Steakhouse nickname)

"Outside is expensive. Lock us back up!" (after quarantine)

"Oven preheat minutes are longer than microwave minutes"

"Over 18 Miles of Books" (Strand Book Store)

"Over 40—we did all our stupid stuff before the invention of the internet, so there’s no proof"

"Over 50 -- we did all our stupid stuff before the invention of the internet, so there's no proof"

"Over 60—we did all our stupid stuff before the invention of the internet, so there’s no proof"

Over For America (Organizing For America or OFA nickname)

"Over-medicated and under-educated is exactly how they want us"

"Over Night Or Over Time" (Alex Hotel)

"Overbought can become more overbought" (Wall Street adage)

Overdoughse (overdose + dough)

"Overeaters Anonymous hotline. Call 888-888-8888"

Overkrauted (too much sauerkraut)

Overland Trout (bacon)

"Overnight is a long time in politics; a week is forever"

"Overslept this morning, was late getting to the living room"

"Oversold can become more oversold" (Wall Street adage)

"Overweight is something that sort of snacks up on you"

"Own your age in bonds"

Owners' Box or Owner's Box (Texas House gallery where lobbyists sit)

"Owning a funeral home means you go back to work after you die"

"Owning a gun isn't small dick energy. SDE is relying on the government to keep you safe"

"Owning dogs is perfect for people who never want to eat a whole sandwich by themselves again"

"Owning the Yankees is like owning the Mona Lisa" (George Steinbrenner)

Ox Eyes (Ojos de Buey) or Eggs in Hell (Eggs in Purgatory)

Oxford English Dictionary "Big Apple" definition (September 2008)

"Oxygen and Magnesium walk into a bar..." (bar joke)

"Oxygen, Hydrogen, Sulfur, Sodium, and Phosphorus walk into a bar..." (bar joke)

Oxygin (oxygen + gin)

Oysgezoomt

Oyster and Artichoke Soup (Artichoke and Oyster Soup)

Oyster Bar

"Oyster crackers are like animal crackers of the sea"

"Oyster crackers are technically animal crackers"

"Oyster crackers are the worst of all the animal crackers"

"Oyster, n. A person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms"

Oyster Nachos

Oyster Pan Roast

Oyster Stew (Christmas Eve Oyster Stew)

Oysters Bienville

Oysters Bienville

"Oysters have always been on my shuck-it list"

Oysters Rockefeller

Oysters Rockefeller

Oysters Suzette

Oysters Suzette

Oysters Texasfeller

Oz Prize or Ozzie (Asia Society journalism award)

Ozone Parker (inhabitant of Ozone Park, Queens)