“I put the thingamabob inside the whatchamacallit, turned the doohickey…”
Folksy "placeholder" words sound more ridiculous in the same sentence. "I've told them a hundred times 'Don't touch the whatchamacallit because it will make the…
Folksy "placeholder" words sound more ridiculous in the same sentence. "I've told them a hundred times 'Don't touch the whatchamacallit because it will make the…
"Soda pressing" is a pun for "so depressing." A rock song titled "Soda Pressing" by the punk group Boys was released in 1977. "He had a soft drink while catching…
A popular marriage joke was posted on the newsgroup alt.humor.jewish on November 4, 2000: "My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God, and I didn't."…
"I quit my job working at a helium factory. I refuse to be spoken to in that tone of voice" is a joke that has been printed on several images. The joke has been cited in print since at…
A joke on the term "stakeholder" is: "I recently bought 51% of a vampire hunting company. I'm now the main stake holder." The joke was posted on Sickipedia and Twitter on…
"'I talk too much,' Evan Davis admitted. 'I've joined a self-help group called On-and-On-Anon. Our meetings go forever'" was printed in the Lansing (MI) State…
"@AuburnJokes: An Auburn player recently passed a drug test. Which was strange because he didn't remember eating one" was posted on Twitter by Michael D'Elia on April 29, 2012.…
"I refuse to work with compost, it's degrading..." is a jocular line that was posted on Twitter by Martin ‘Vaccinated’ Williams on May 2, 2014. "I refuse to work with…
"I said to my boss the other day, 'I need to leave early today, I'm going to be a father!'" is the start of a joke that has been told on Reddit -- Jokes since November 27,…
"I skip Black Friday because my hatred of mankind outweighs my love for stuff" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. Many people try to avoid the Black Friday shopping…
To "show someone the ropes" is an expression that began on sailing ships. The literal ropes are usually a metaphor in this common work expression, but there are bell ringer jokes.…
An "entremanure" (entrepreneur + manure) is someone who makes money from manure -- usually from its use as fertilizer. "Entremanure" has been cited in print since at least 1985,…
Start-up businesses try to get "off the ground," but usually not literally. A joke was posted on AnimalJokes.co.uk in 2003: "Did you hear about the pig who tried to start a hot-air…
A joke about a man who steals a car to get to work is: JUDGE: Why did you steal the car? MAN: I had to get to work.JUDGE: Why didn't you take the bus? MAN: I don't have a driver's…
"I grew up living paycheck to paycheck, but through hard work and perseverance, I now live direct deposit to direct deposit" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…
"I'd like to thank the person who taught me the meaning of the word 'bargain', it means a great deal" was posted on Twitter by Spocksgoat on December 17, 2014. A form of…
A popular work one-liner is: "I tell new hires, 'Don’t think of me as your boss, think of me as a friend who can fire you.'" "Boss = a friend who can fire you" was…
Getting high on a test might be good, but getting high on a drug test might be bad. "I think I aced my drug test at work yesterday. Nobody got higher than me" was posted on Reddit --…
"I think I still have some unfinished procrastinating to do from yesterday" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I think I still have some unfinished…
"Tap to Pay" might be a simple system to some, but it confuses others. This was posted on X/Twitter by Mommy Needs A Life on March 5, 2024: "I think I’m pretty smart until I’m…