“Two sheep walk into a New York City pizzeria…” (joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A sheep version is: "Two sheep walk into a baaaaaa." "Two sheep walk into a…
“Two sheep walk into a pub…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A sheep version is: "Two sheep walk into a baaaaaa." "Two sheep walk into a…
“Two vampires walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A vampire version is: "Two vampires walk into a bar. 'I'll have a pint of…
“Two whales walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A whale version has been printed on many images: "Two whales walk into a bar. The…
“Two women walk into a bar and talk about the Bechdel test…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A joke about the Bechdel test is: "Two women walk into a bar, and talk about the…
“Un cuadrangular en sabor (A home run of flavor)” (El Nuevo Caridad restaurant)
El Nuevo Caridad restaurant, at 191st Street and St. Nicholas Avenue, is a place to watch Dominican baseball players. The restaurant's slogan is ""Un cuadrangular en sabor (A home…
“Upkeep of most Chinese restaurants is Lo Meintenance”
The Chinese dish of "lo mein" has spawned some "lo meintenance" (lo mein + low maintenance) puns. " Lo Meintenance" was posted on the newsgroup…
“Used Beer Department—Two Shake Maximum” (restroom sign, especially in a bar)
"Used Beer Department" is a jocular restroom sign that has been printed on many images. "Two Shake Maximum" is sometimes added. "Used beer department" was printed in…
“Veni, Vidi, Venti” (“I came, I saw, I ordered Starbucks coffee”)
"Veni, Vidi, Venti" ("I came, I saw, I ordered Starbucks coffee") is a joke on the Latin "Veni, vidi, vici" ("I came, I saw, I conquered"). "Venti"…
“Waffle House implies the existence of a Waffle Senate”
Waffle House is an American restaurant chain. There is no Waffle Senate, but there are jokes. "Can we have a Waffle Senate to compete with our Waffle House" was posted on Twitter by…
“Waiter, does the pianist play requests?” (joke)
Some diners enjoy live music, but many diners do not. A popular joke has been cited in print since at least 1922, with the following example (with a waiter) from 1964: Night club patron: "Does…
“Waiter, how come there are no chairs at our table?”/“I’m sorry, but you only booked one table.”
A booking of a restaurant "table" usually includes the chairs, but there are jokes. "A guest calls the waiter n complains, 'Hw come der r no chairs at our table?!'-The…
“Waiter, I can’t find any oysters in this oyster soup.”/“Would you expect angels in angel cake?”
A restaurant joke is: Diner: Waiter, I can’t seem to find any oysters in this oyster soup. Waiter: Would you expect to find angels in angel cake? The joke involved "chicken pie" instead…
“Waiter, I want a table for dinner!”/“Boiled or roasted, sir?”
Entry in progress -- B.P. Google BooksBlonde Walks into a Bar: The 4,000 Most Hilarious, Gut-Busting Gags, One-liners and JokesBy Jonathan SwanBerkeley, CA: Ulysses Press2008Pg. ?:Waiter, waiter,…
“Waiter, I’d like a bottle of wine.” / “What year, sir?” / “Right now.”
Restaurant waiters sometimes ask their customers what year they want their wines from, and there's a popular joke that has been featured in comic strips. The misunderstanding customers usually…
“Waiter, my soup is cold.”/ “It’s Gazpacho.”/ “Well, Gazpacho, my soup is cold.”
Gazpacho is a cold vegetable soup. It's not the name of a waiter, but there's a restaurant joke: Diner: Waiter, my soup is cold.Waiter: It's Gazpacho.Diner: Well, Gazpacho, my soup…
“Waiter, taste the soup!” (joke)
A classic New York old-Jew_at-a-restaurant joke was told in a Leonard Lyons (1906-1976) 'The Lyons Den" column in the New York (NY) Post in October 1956: "The story is being told of…
“Waiter, there is a bee in my alphabet soup!”/“I’m sure there is an A, C and all the other letters.”
Alphabet soup doesn't help with spelling bees, but there are jokes about pairing the two. There are "fly in my soup" and "bee/B in my soup" jokes about alphabet soup as…
“Waiter, there is a spider in my soup.”/“Yes sir, I put it there to catch the fly.”
A spider variation on the “Waiter! There’s a fly in my soup!” joke is: Diner: Waiter, there is a spider in my soup.Waiter: Yes sir, I put it there to catch the fly. Google Groups:…
“Waiter, there’s a bee in my soup.”/“Yes sir, it is the fly’s day off.”
A bee variation on the “Waiter! There’s a fly in my soup!” joke is: Diner: Waiter, there's a bee in my soup.Waiter: Yes sir, it is the fly's day off. Google Groups: rec.humorWAITER…