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April 20, 2017
Education/Schools

“Homework: Because 7 hours of school wasn’t enough”

"Homework: Because 7 hours of school wasn't enough" is a jocular one-line school saying that has been printed on many images. "Homework: because 5 hours of school a day…

July 16, 2017
Education/Schools

“Homework: If it goes too easy, you’re doing it wrong”

"Homework: If it goes too easy, you're doing it wrong" is a one-line homework saying that has been printed on several images. "Quick tip: if you think your calc homework is too…

July 27, 2009
Food/Drink

“Hominy, sir?”/“Oh, about four or five.” (Northerner ordering grits)

A Northerner tells a waitress that he wants to order grits. "Hominy, sir?" the waitress asks. "Oh, about four or five," replies the confused customer. "Hominy" sounds…

December 8, 2019
Exercise/Running/Health Clubs

“Honestly, I don’t mind leg day at the gym. It’s just the two days after that I can’t stand”

"I can't stand" (meaning a dislike of something) usually is not taken literally, but there are jokes. This gym joke was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on August 3, 2019: "Honestly, I…

June 18, 2017
Food/Drink

“Honestly, I’ve never seen anyone fall because of a banana peel”

The banana peel gag -- a person slipping on a banana peel -- has been a popular type of humor since the 19th century. "Honestly, I've never seen anyone fall because of a banana peel"…

March 15, 2024
Media/Newspapers/Magazines/Internet

“Honestly, it’s not the way I look that reveals my age, it’s my use of complete sentences when I text”

"Honestly, it's not the way I look that reveals my age, it's my use of complete sentences when I text" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was…

January 19, 2020
Exercise/Running/Health Clubs

“Honestly, my biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking”

"Honestly, my biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The saying is a reference to zombie stories such as the…

September 16, 2026
Pets (Dogs, Cats, Horses)

“Honestly, nobody wants a better phone. Everyone just wants their dog to live to be 60. Get your priorities straight, science”

"Honestly, nobody wants a better phone/smartphone. Everyone just wants their dog to live to be 60. Get your priorities straight, science" is a saying that has been printed on many images.…

September 16, 2026
Pets (Dogs, Cats, Horses)

“Honestly, nobody wants a better smartphone. Everyone just wants their dog to live to be like 60. Get your priorities straight, science”

"Honestly, nobody wants a better phone/smartphone. Everyone just wants their dog to live to be 60. Get your priorities straight, science" is a saying that has been printed on many images.…

November 29, 2010
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“Honesty in politics is like oxygen—the higher up you go, the scarcer it becomes”

"Honesty in politics is much like oxygen -- the higher up you go, the scarcer it becomes" is a humorous saying about politics that's cited frequently on the internet. George D.…

December 28, 2015
Work/Businesses

“Honesty is a very expensive gift. Don’t expect it from cheap people”

"Honesty is a very expensive gift. Don't expect it from cheap people" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Honesty is a expensive gift. Don’t expect that gift…

August 7, 2012
Work/Businesses

“Honesty is not only morally right, it’s also highly efficient”

"Honesty is not only morally right, it's also highly efficient" is a popular saying that has been printed on a sign. Randy Pausch (1960-2008), a professor at Carnegie Mellon…

June 24, 2016
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is the best defense”

'Honesty is the best policy" is an old proverb. "Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is the best defense" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…

May 21, 2023
Food/Drink

“Honey is the tastiest of all the insect vomits we have tried so far”

Honey has been called "bee vomit." However, honey is technically not bee vomit. The honey that is made has not been digested and has never reached a bee’s intestines. "Honey is the…

April 1, 2019
Transportation

“Honk if a kid falls out” (bumper sticker)

"Honk if a kid falls out" (or "Honk if the kids fall out" or "Honk if one of my kids flies out" or "Honk if a kid fell out") is a jocular saying that has…

July 5, 2010
Government/Law/Military/Religion /Health

“Honk if I’m paying your mortgage” (bumper sticker)

The tea party movement of 2009 protested against reckless government spending. The Tennessee Republican Party issued a bumper sticker in February 2009: "Honk if you're paying my…

April 1, 2019
Transportation

“Honk if one of my kids flies out” (bumper sticker)

"Honk if a kid falls out" (or "Honk if the kids fall out" or "Honk if one of my kids flies out" or "Honk if a kid fell out") is a jocular saying that has…

April 1, 2019
Transportation

“Honk if parts fall off” (bumper sticker)

"Honk if (you see) parts fall off" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many bumper stickers. "I saw a funny bumpersticker on an old pickup truck yesterday: Honk If You See…

September 23, 2025
Transportation

“Honk if you hate everything” (bumper sticker)

"Honk if you hate everything" is a bumper sticker saying that has been printed on several images. The bumper sticker has been cited since at least 2022. NYY Fans Forum Favorite bumper…

August 25, 2016
Transportation

“Honk if you love Jesus. Text if you want to meet him” (bumper sticker)

"Honk if you love Jesus. Text while driving if you want to meet him" is a popular bumper sticker to discourage texting while driving. "Honk if you love Jesus" has been on bumper…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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