“What kind of pepper can talk?”/“Hablanero.”
"Habanero" is a hot variety of chili pepper. "Hablanero" -- "habla" is Spanish for "speak" -- is a joke. "El hablanero pimiento, the speaking…
“What kind of person doesn’t like pizza? A weirdough”
"Weirdo" is sometimes jocularly written as "weirdough" (weird/weirdo + dough). "Crêpe" can sound like "creep," and "donut" like "do…
“What kind of person eats aluminum?”/“A can-nibble.”
"Cannibal" can sound like "can nibble" -- meaning someone "able to nibble" or someone who "nibbles cans" (or nibbles from cans). "What kind of person…
“What kind of pizza do pilots like?”/“Plain.”
Plain pizza has its own classic joke: "What kind of pizza do pilots like?""Plain." The joke has been cited in print since at least 2008. napoleonherselfdarnn on January 13th,…
“What kind of rolling papers do you need to smoke brisket?”
"Do you smoke?" is a common question a doctor asks a patient. "Yes, mostly brisket, some ribs" is a jocular answer. "'Do you smoke?' Yeah. Brisket, turkey,…
“What kind of salad do termites eat?”/“House salad.”
A “house salad” is the regular salad of an American restaurant. It’s not made of a house or served to a house, but there are jokes. "What kind of salad do termites eat? House salad"…
“What kind of shoes do bakers wear?”/“Loafers.”
A baker riddle is: Q: What kind of shoes do bakers wear?A: Loafers. The "loafers" joke has been cited in print since at least 1984. “What kind of shoes does bread…
“What kind of shoes does bread wear?”/“Loafers.”
A bread riddle is: Q: What kind of shoes does bread wear?A: Loafers. The "loafers" joke has been cited in print since at least 1996. “What kind of shoes do bakers…
“What kind of sugar does Darth Vader prefer in his coffee?”/“Imperial Sugar.”
Several Star Wars jokes involve Darth Vader and coffee. "Q:What kind of sugar does Darth Vader prefer in his coffee? A: Imperial Sugar" was posted on Twitter by nathan_clark on April 8,…
“What kind of tea do you drink with the queen?”/“Royal-tea.”
"Royalty" sounds like "royal tea." A pun was posted on the website Pun of the Day and then on the newsgroup Google Groups: alt.humor.puns on September 19, 1999: "The people…
“What kind of tea is hard to swallow?”/“Reality.”
A popular pun about tea is: Q: What kind of tea is sometimes hard to swallow?A: Reality. The joke was from 9-year-old Benje Morris of Charlotte, North Carolina, who won a 1994 Laffy Taffy…
“What kind of vegetable has the worst manners?”/“A rudeabaga.”
"If you were a vegetable, you'd be a rudeabaga" (rude + rutabaga) is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images. "If you were a plant you'd be a…
“What kind of vegetable is jealous?”/“A green bean.”
People get "green" with envy, and there's a vegetable riddle: Q: What kind of vegetable is jealous?A: A green bean. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2006. Sumo…
“What kind of vegetable might you find in your basement?”/“Cellary.”
Entry in progress -- BP Twitterpresident jojo@NonePizza@WilliamShatner what kind of vegetable might you find in your basement?? CELLARY11:07 PM · Jun 9, 2013·Twitter Web Client TwitterDavid R.…
“What kind of vegetable never bowls a strike?”/“Asparagus.”
There is no "spare" in asparagus, but there's a riddle: Q: What kind of vegetable never bowls a strike?A: Asparagus. The joke was posted on Twitter by Steve Marowski on January 19,…
“What kind of vegetables did they eat in the 18th century?”/“Baroque-oli.”
"Broccoli" is sometimes punned on many images as "baroque-oli." "What was Bach's favourite vegetable? Baroque-oli #unfunnyjokes" was posted on Twitter on July 26,…
“What kind of vitamin do you get from Canadian maple syrup?”/“Vitamin Eh?”
A joke on Canadian speech is that Canadians are rich in "Vitamin Eh?" (a pun on "Vitamin A"). "Vitamin Eh" was printed in the The Globe and Mail (Toronto, ON) on July…
“What kind of water do cats like to drink?”/“Purr-ified water.”
A cat riddle is: Q: What kind of water do cats like to drink?A: Purr-ified water. "What's a cat's favorite water? Pur-ified" was posted on Twitter on June 6, 2013. "What…
“What kind of water do you put into a waterbed?”/“Spring water.”
A riddle about spring water is: Q: What kind of water do you put into a waterbed?A: Spring water. "So, spring water at the grocery store. That's for your water bed right?" was posted…
“What kind of wine do horses drink?”/“Caberneigh.”
A wine riddle was posted on Twitter on October 18, 2011: Q: What's a horse's favorite wine?A: Caber-neigh! "Caberneigh" (Cabernet + neigh) is usually used in the joke, but…