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July 16, 2017
Education/Schools

“Homework: If it goes too easy, you’re doing it wrong”

"Homework: If it goes too easy, you're doing it wrong" is a one-line homework saying that has been printed on several images. "Quick tip: if you think your calc homework is too…

November 16, 2017
Education/Schools

“How did the math teacher kill himself?”/“He used a hypotenuse.”

There isn't a "noose" in "hypotenuse," but this math riddle was posted on Twitter on May 13, 2013: Q: How did the math professor kill himself?A: He used a hypotenuse. A…

March 17, 2016
Education/Schools

“How do bees get to school?”/“On the school buzz.”

A popular children's pun about school is: Q: How do bees get to school? A: By school buzz! The children's joke has been cited in print since at least 1992. 15 June 1992, Indiana (PA)…

June 21, 2016
Education/Schools

“How do you catch a school of fish?”/“With a bookworm.”

A popular riddle about a "school of fish" is: Q: How do you catch a school of fish?A: With a bookworm. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1990. 17 July 1990, State Times…

October 23, 2017
Education/Schools

“How do you get a parrot to talk properly?”/“Send him to polytechnic.”

A "polytechnic" is not full of parrots (Pollys, as in "Polly want a cracker?"), but there's a riddle: Q: How do you get a parrot to talk properly?A: Send him to…

February 19, 2021
Education/Schools

“How do you get into college?”/“Through the door.”

"How do you get into college?" usually refers to being accepted at a college, but there are jokes. "'My son got into DeVry' 'what'd he have to do? Open the…

January 15, 2025
Education/SchoolsMusic/Dance/Theatre/Film/Circus

“How do you get into the School of Rock?”/“You rock enroll.”

School of Rock is a 2003 comedy film directed by Richard Linklater. A "rock and roll" pun was posted on X/Twitter by LaughBreak || Dad Jokes ‘N More on August 29, 2023, and again on…

May 17, 2024
Banking/Finance/InsuranceEducation/Schools

“How do you know somebody is broke?”/“They have a college degree.”

Many people with college degrees can’t afford to repay their student loans. "How do you know someone is broke? They have a college degree" was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on May 9,…

May 17, 2024
Banking/Finance/InsuranceEducation/Schools

“How do you know someone is broke?”/“They have a college degree.”

Many people with college degrees can’t afford to repay their student loans. "How do you know someone is broke? They have a college degree" was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on May 9,…

March 4, 2015
Education/Schools

“How do you like school, Billy?”/“Closed.”

A joke was printed in the New York City humor magazine Judge in 1922: Kind Old Gentleman -- How do you like school, my little man?Little Man -- I like it closed, sir. The joke is still told today,…

October 25, 2016
Education/Schools

“How do zombies do well in school?”/“They eat lots of brain food.”

A riddle about zombies is: Q: How do zombies do well in school?A: They eat lots of brain food. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2012. TwitterDavid Murray‏@SasquatchDaveWhy do…

November 13, 2025
Education/Schools

“How easy is it to count in binary? It’s as easy as 01 10 11”

"Binary: It's as easy as 01, 10, 11" (or "How easy is it to count in binary? It's as easy as 01 10 11") is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The…

November 4, 2020
Education/Schools

“How many bones are in a human body?”/“Usually, all of them.”

A quiz question in anatomy class might be how many bones there are in the human body. A human body has 206 bones, but there are joke answers to this question. "How many bones are in the human…

November 4, 2020
Education/Schools

“How many bones are in the human foot?”/“All of them.”

A quiz question in anatomy class might be how many bones there are in the human body. A human body has 206 bones, but there are joke answers to this question. "How many bones are in the human…

November 4, 2020
Education/Schools

“How many bones are in your hand?”/“A handful.”

A quiz question in anatomy class might be how many bones there are in the human body. A human body has 206 bones, but there are joke answers to this question. "How many bones are in the human…

November 4, 2020
Education/Schools

“How many bones are in your head?”/“All of them.”

A quiz question in anatomy class might be how many bones there are in the human body. A human body has 206 bones, but there are joke answers to this question. "How many bones are in the human…

October 11, 2014
Education/Schools

“How many college freshmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?” (joke)

Students at one college or university often tell a joke about a rival school: Q: How many (insert college name) freshmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?A: None. That's a sophomore-level…

December 12, 2017
Education/Schools

“How many frat boys does it take to change a light bulb?”/“None, they prefer natural light.”

There have been several versions of fraternities and beer in the traditional lightbulb joke. This is from 1984: Q: How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: Three: One to screw it…

December 3, 2017
Education/Schools

“How many NCAA players does it take to change a lightbulb?” (joke)

A joke about college athletes is: Q: How many NCAA basketball players does it take to change a light bulb?A: One. But he gets nine credits, $3,000, and a new car for it. The joke was posted on the…

March 23, 2022
Education/Schools

“How many pedants does it take to change a lightbulb?” (riddle)

A lightbulb joke was posted on rec.humor on September 9, 1992: Q: How many pedants does it take to change a lightbulb?A: Pedants don't c-h-a-n-g-e lightbulbs, they r-e-p-l-a-c-e them. Another…

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BARRY POPIK is a contributor to the Oxford English Dictionary, Dictionary of American Regional English, Historical Dictionary of American Slang, Yale Book of Quotations and Dictionary of Modern Proverbs. Since 1990 he has also been a regular contributor to Gerald Cohen's Comments on Etymology.

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