“Yesterday, a clown held a door open for me. I thought it was a nice jester”
"Gesture" sounds a bit like "jester," and there's a pun that has been printed on GIFs: "Yesterday, a clown held a door open for me. I thought it was a nice…
“Yo mama is so ugly, she went into a haunted house and came out with a paycheck”
A popular "yo mama" insult "so ugly" joke is popular at Halloween: "Yo mama is so ugly, she went into a haunted house and came out with a job application." Later…
“Yo momma so fat, when there’s a full moon she turns into a warehouse”
A warehouse has nothing to do with a werewolf, but there are jokes. "When the full moon comes out does a werewolf's house turn into a warehouse?" was posted on Facebook by Joey…
“You can always tell a dogwood by its bark”
Dogs bark. Trees have bark. An old joke is told about the flowering dogwood tree. "Dog-wood, says the New York Star, may readily be distinguished by its peculiar bark" was printed in the…
“You can trust your dog to guard your house, but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich”
Trust has its limits. "You can trust your dog to guard your house but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich" was posted on Twitter on November 20, 2012. "You can trust a dog to…
“You can turn your ordinary sofa into a sofa bed simply by forgetting your wife’s birthday”
"Turn a regular sofa into a sofa bed by simply forgetting your wife’s birthday" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "TURN a regular sofa into a sofa bed by…
“You can’t go wrong with bricks and mortar”
"You can't go wrong with bricks and mortar," someone from the real estate industry might say. That is, you can't go wrong buying property. The proverb is not always true, of…
“You can’t plant flowers if you haven’t botany”
Entry in progress -- B.P. TwitterJim Chaparas JimGCknows that it is difficult to study Plants if you haven't BOTANY ....10:34 AM - 10 Sep 2010 TwitterⒶpril Fe☭es🚩 @leducvioletI…
“You can’t spell ‘house’ without hoes”
Several jokes involve the spelling of "house." "'You can't spell 'house' without hoes' - @srikvlteswaran" was posted on X/Twitter by Disobedient Avocado…
“You come from dust, you return to dust. That’s why I don’t dust. It could be someone I know”
"You come from dust, and you will return to dust. That's why I don't dust. It could be someone I know!" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The original…
“You don’t build a church for Easter Sunday”
"You don't build a church for Easter Sunday" is an idiom that often does not involve architecture. Easter Sunday is when a church usually has the most people; on any other Sunday,…
“You don’t have to give your bathroom a beach theme, there is no one enforcing this”
It's very common for a bathroom to be decorated with a beach theme, but that is not required by law. "What is it with white people & beach themed bathrooms?" was posted on…
“You don’t have to give your bathroom a beach theme. There’s no law”
It's very common for a bathroom to be decorated with a beach theme, but that is not required by law. "What is it with white people & beach themed bathrooms?" was posted on…
“You know you’re getting old when you clean your house to the music you used to get drunk to”
"You know you're over 30 when you now clean your house to the music you used to get drunk to" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying has several small…
“You know you’re getting old when you hear your favorite song in an elevator”
New Yorkers spend a lot of time in elevators. A list of "Top 25 signs that you've already grown up" was distributed on the Internet in 1999, and one sign is: 5. You hear your…
“You know you’re over 30 when you now clean your house to the music you used to get drunk to”
"You know you're over 30 when you now clean your house to the music you used to get drunk to" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying has several small…
“You know you’re over 40 when you now clean your house to the music you used to get drunk to”
"You know you're over 30 when you now clean your house to the music you used to get drunk to" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying has several small…
“You turn 25 and you start experimenting with different settings on your washing machine and it’s really exciting”
Are you an adult when you start to explore different settings on household appliances? This joke was poste on X/Twitter by harky on October 4, 2025, and it received over 14,000 likes: "You…
“You usually don’t know how poorly you swept until you start mopping”
People sweep the floor, then mop -- and find that they didn't sweep well enough. "Just when you think you've swept up all the dog hair, then you start to mop..." was posted on…
“You will be told this summer to lower your AC usage to stop overwhelming the electric grid…”
"You will be told this summer to lower your AC usage to stop overwhelming the electric grid while being told to drive electric cars" is a saying about government illogic and nonsense that…