“I moved into a bungalow. I wanted a house, but that’s another story”
A "story" ("storey" in the United Kingdom) is another floor of a building. One joke is: "I moved into a bungalow recently. Was going to move into a house, but that's…
A "story" ("storey" in the United Kingdom) is another floor of a building. One joke is: "I moved into a bungalow recently. Was going to move into a house, but that's…
A money joke was told by The Unknown Comic (Murray Langston) on television's The Gong Show (1976-1980): "I got an apartment over a bank. Now my assets over 10 million dollars." The…
Feng shui is a Chinese philosophical system of harmony that is reflected is many building designs. A "turn the tables" pun is often made. "People used to believe in Feng Shui. But…
"I paid my rent so don't ask me to come out. I'm at home getting my money's worth" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. So much money has been paid for…
"I paid the rent... Now I've got a place to starve to death" (or "Paid my rent, now I have a place to starve") is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images.…
"I saw a guy at the beach yelling, 'Help! Shark! Help!' I just laughed. I knew the shark wasn't going to help him" is a joke that as been printed on many images. The person…
"I saw a sign that made me piss myself. It said, 'Toilets closed'" is a joke that has been printed on several images. "I saw a sign today that made me piss myself…
"I saw a sign that made me shit myself. It said, 'Bathroom closed'" is a joke that has been printed on several images. "I saw a sign today that made me piss myself…
A trombone riddle was posted on Twitter on April 7, 2012: Q: Why is it no fun to go the park with a trombone player? A: They can’t swing and complain about the slide. Forms of the…
Many homes have garden gnomes. Homes that do not have them are "gnomeless." "It you lose a garden gnome are you gnomeless? #themoreyouknow" was posted on Twitter by The Knower…
A fortnight joke was posted on X/Twitter by FizzySnood on August 23, 2015: " I sleep in a castle once every two weeks. It's my fort night." Wikipedia: Fortnight A fortnight is a unit…
"I stood waving to my neighbour for 10 minutes this morning before realising she was just cleaning her windows" is a joke that was posted on Facebook by Paulo Raulino on May 18, 2020. The…
"I read old books because I would rather learn from those who built civilization than those who tore it down" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "A lot of talk about…
"Stair" shouldn't be confused with "stare," but there are jokes. "And the time I confused a builder by wanting an unpainted set of steps. He just gave me a blank…
"Stair" shouldn't be confused with "stare," but there are jokes. "And the time I confused a builder by wanting an unpainted set of steps. He just gave me a blank…
"Stair" shouldn't be confused with "stare," but there are jokes. "And the time I confused a builder by wanting an unpainted set of steps. He just gave me a blank…
A typical "mother-in-law joke" involves her coming to the son-in-law's house. "Pat told his mother-in-law to make herself at home. She did. She sold it" was printed in the…
A winter joke was posted on the website Pun of the Day on April 25, 2017: "I told my wife that it was her turn to shovel and salt the front steps. All I got was icy stares." "Icy…
Many people take the batteries out of a carbon monoxide detector because of constant false beeping, but often the beeping isn't false. "I took the batteries out of my carbon monoxide…
"I used to have a rock garden -- they all died" is a classic joke. Rocks don't die like plants do, of course. The joke is that the speaker is a very poor gardener. "I once had a…