“Dancers count 5-6-7-8 because musicians took 1-2-3-4”
"Dancers count 5-6-7-8 because musicians took 1-2-3-4" is a saying that has been printed on an image. There are several technical answers. "Wondering why drummers usually start songs…
Archive for /P24360
“Chinese food is one of the few things I have or consume that isn’t really made in China”
Many things in America are made in China, but what about Chinese food? "Chinese food... the only American product not Made in China?" was posted on Twitter on April 10, 2009.…
“A selfie with a celebrity is the new form of an autograph”
People used to ask celebrities for autographs, but now, they ask celebrities to be in their selfies. "The new form of asking for an autograph is 'can i get a selfie?'" was…
“I sometimes wonder if Uncle Ben and Aunt Jemima are married to each other”
Uncle Ben's is a brand name for rice products. Aunt Jemima is a brand name for pancake mixes and syrups. People sometimes joke that Uncle Ben and Aunt Jemima are married, and this has been…
“Why are fishmongers never generous?”/“Because their business makes them sell-fish.”
A fishmonger riddle is: Q: Why is a fishmonger never generous?A: Because his business is sell-fish. The "sell-fish"/"selfish" pun has been cited in print since at least 1879.…
“I have a step ladder. I never knew my real ladder”
Are step-ladders like step-fathers? "I have a step ladder. I never knew my real ladder" is a popular joke of uncertain origin. "It's not my REAL ladder. It's my…
“Never drink with a man who has no hands because he can’t hold his liquor”
The term "to hold one's liquor" doesn't refer to physical holding in one's hands, but there are jokes. "Just read about a guy who lost his hands in a terrible accident…
“It’s strange that there is a setting on your toaster to completely burn the bread”
Many people burn toast on a low setting, and then wonder why there are higher settings. "Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human…
“I sold fake eclipse glasses. but those suckers will never see me again”
There was a solar eclipse on August 21, 2017. A joke was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on August 24, 2017: "This past week I made a couple bucks selling fake eclipse glasses. I'm not to…
“I hate chewing gum underneath school tables. I wish I was comfortable enough to do it in public”
Many people put gum underneath school tables -- to the disgust of others who find it. A joke was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on August 25, 2017: "I hate chewing gum underneath school tables. I…
“I hate chewing gum underneath school tables. I wish I was comfortable enough to do it in public”
Many people put gum underneath school tables -- to the disgust of others who find it. A joke was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on August 25, 2017: "I hate chewing gum underneath school tables. I…
“I haven’t seen faith move mountains, but I have seen what faith can do to buildings”
Jokes about the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks on New York City's World Trade Center are numerous, although not always politically correct. One joke/saying is: "I haven't seen…
“Coffee is really just hot bean water”
"Coffee is bean water" is an observation that was posted on Twitter on October 27, 2009. "Coffee is just bean water" was posted on Twitter on July 13, 2010. "When you think…
“Vegans think people who sell meat are disgusting, but people who sell fruit and veg are grocer”
Stand-up comedian Adele Cliff told this joke at the 2017 Edinburgh Festival Fringe: “As a vegan, I think people who sell meat are disgusting, but apparently people who sell fruit and veg are…
“Paper money is cold hard cash. A credit/debit card is hold card cash”
Paper money is "cold hard cash." A credit/debit card is "hold card cash." The line was posted on Reddit -- Shower Thoughts on AUgust 23, 2017: "paper money: **cold hard…
“If self driving cars become a huge industry, ice cream trucks will be mobile vending machines”
Are food trucks really mobile vending machines? "And instead of food trucks, we refer to them as mobile vending machines?" was posted on Twitter on December 20, 2016. "If self…
“What did the Jedi order at the Italian restaurant?”/“Only one cannoli.”
Obi-Wan "Ben" Kenobi is a fictional character in the Star Wars movie franchise. "Only one cannoli" is a food take-off on the name that has been cited in print since at least…
“Technically, every beverage is just flavored water”
"Well then in essence, every beverage is something-flavored water" is a saying that was posted on Twitter on January 27, 2012. "Every beverage is just flavored water" was posted…
“Carrot juice is technically orange juice”
People have noticed that orange juice is yellow and carrot juice is orange. "Carrot juice is juice, and it is orange, but it is not orange juice" was posted on Twitter on May 28, 2009.…
“Caffeine is the new black”
"Caffeine is the new black" is a saying that has been printed on many images -- especially coffee mugs. Black coffee contains caffeine. "HEY YOU!! sleep is over-rated!! Caffeine is…