“An acre of performance is worth a whole world of promise”
"An acre of performance is worth a whole world of promise" is an old English proverb. English Elizabethan pamphleteer Thomas Nashe (1567-1601) wrote in 1596: "One acre of…
Archive for 10/2016
“Why did the moron jump from the building?”/“He wanted to make a hit on Broadway.”
"Broadway" often means "show business" rather than just the street itself, but there's an old "Little Moron" riddle from August 1942 that involves both meanings:…
“Why did the moron jump from the building?”/“He wanted to make a hit on Broadway.”
"Broadway" often means "show business" rather than just the street itself, but there's an old "Little Moron" riddle from August 1942 that involves both meanings:…
“Why did the moron jump from the building?”/“He wanted to make a hit on Broadway.”
"Broadway" often means "show business" rather than just the street itself, but there's an old "Little Moron" riddle from August 1942 that involves both meanings:…
“What kind of coffee does a vampire drink?”/“De-coffinated.”
A popular vampire riddle is: Q: What kind of coffee does a vampire drink?A: Decoffinated. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1995. 4 June 1995, The Sun-Herald (Sydney, Australia), pg.…
“What do ghosts drink?”/“Ghoul-Aid.”
A popular Halloween pun on Kool-Aid is: Q: What do thirsty ghosts drink?A: Ghoul-Aid. "Ghoul-Aid" was a Halloween menu item cited in 1966 newspapers. "Q. What is a werewolf's…
“What do you call an empty hot dog?/“A halloweenie.”
A Halloween hot dog riddle is: Q: What do you call an empty hot dog?A: A hollow weenie. "WHY IS TODAY LIKE AN EMPTY HOT DOG? (...) BECAUSE IT'S HALLOWEENIE!" was printed in "The…
“What is a pumpkin’s favorite sport?”/“Squash.”
A pumpkin riddle is: Q: What is a pumpkin's favorite sport?A: Squash. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2001. Wikipedia: Squash (sport)Squash is a racket sport played by two…
“How do zombies do well in school?”/“They eat lots of brain food.”
A riddle about zombies is: Q: How do zombies do well in school?A: They eat lots of brain food. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2012. TwitterDavid Murray@SasquatchDaveWhy do…
“I ordered a Manhattan and that Indian bartender charged me $24!”
Peter Minuit purchased the island of Manhattan from the Lenape Indians for $24 worth of trinkets in 1626, according a popular New York City legend. A joke was published in the Los Angeles (CA)…
“How do zombies do well in school?”/“They eat lots of brain food.”
A riddle about zombies is: Q: How do zombies do well in school?A: They eat lots of brain food. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2012. TwitterDavid Murray@SasquatchDaveWhy do…
“Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?”/“No, they eat fingers separately.”
A popular Halloween riddle about how zombies (or monsters) eat is: Q: Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?A: No, they eat the fingers separately. The joke has been cited in print since at…
“What is a pumpkin’s favorite sport?”/“Squash.”
A pumpkin riddle is: Q: What is a pumpkin's favorite sport?A: Squash. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2001. Wikipedia: Squash (sport)Squash is a racket sport played by two…
“What do witches ask for at a hotel?”/“Broom service.”
A popular Halloween riddle about witches is: Q: What do witches ask for at a hotel?A: Broom service. The joke was printed in Boys' Life magazine in 1985. Google BooksMay 1985, Boys' Life,…
“What do you call a haunted chicken?”/“A poultry-geist.”
A Halloween riddle about poltergeists is: Q: What do you call a haunted chicken?A: A poultry-geist. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1996. Wikipedia: PoltergeistIn folklore and…
“What instrument does a skeleton play?”/“A trombone.”
A popular Halloween riddle about skeletons is: Q: What instrument does a skeleton play?A: A trombone. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1976. Google BooksBiggest Riddle Book in the…
“Farted on my wallet and now I have gas money”
"Gas money" means "money to buy gas (for the car)," but there's a joke: "Farted on my wallet and now I have gas money." "I farted in the room and charged…
“Farted on my wallet and now I have gas money”
"Gas money" means "money to buy gas (for the car)," but there's a joke: "Farted on my wallet and now I have gas money." "I farted in the room and charged…
Corporate Comedian
A "corporate comedian" is -- according to the original definition -- a professional comedian who performs at business functions. The comedian can make fun of the business and the industry…
“What’s the difference between new age and pagan?” (joke)
A joke about new age and pagan (music and other things) is: Q: What's the difference between new age and pagan?A: About $500 a weekend. That is, it's essentially the same stuff, but…