Cuckservative (cuckolded + conservative)
The term "cuckservative" (cuckolded + conservative) went viral in July 2015. The term describes a conservative who, for example, tolerates illegal immigration and open borders -- things…
Archive for 07/2015
“Where can you learn how to make ice cream?” (joke)
"Sundae"/"Sunday" is included in a popular pun: Q: Where can you learn how to make ice cream?A: Sundae school. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2001-02. Google…
“What language does a billboard speak?”/“Sign language.”
A popular children's joke about a billboard is: Q: What language does a billboard speak? A: Sign language. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2003. Google Groups:…
“Busier than a one-legged man in an ass kicking contest”
"Busier than a one-legged man in an ass kicking contest" is one way to say that someone is very busy. "Busier than a one-legged man at a kicking contest" was cited in print in…
“Busier than a one-armed paper hanger”
"Busier than a one-armed paper hanger" is one way to say that someone is very busy. "Our chef is kept as busy as a one-armed man engaged in the exercise of bean-bag" was printed…
Smoasting (social media boasting); Smoaster (social media boaster)
"Smoasting" (social media boasting) was coined by T-Mobile in June 2012. People travel, then take photos and boast about it. "Smoaster" was cited in a Daily Mail (UK) article on…
“Why did God create armadillos?” (joke)
One popular armadillo joke is: Q: Why did God create armadillos?A: So Texans would have something to eat on the half shell. "Barbecued armadillo on the half shell" was a joke cited in an…
Radish Communist (red on the outside, white on the inside)
Russian politician Leon Trotsky (1879-1940) was heckled by workmen in Kiev in 1919, He said the town was like a radish -- red (communist) outside, but white inside. "Radish" was cited in…
“The pay stinks, but the benefits are out of this world” (religious work joke)
A popular joke is said about religious work (particularly in Christianity): "The pay stinks, but the benefits are out of this world." The joke has been cited in print since at least 1968…
“He who speaks first loses” (negotiating adage)
"He/She who speaks first loses" is an axiom of business negotiation. Don't be the first one at the bargaining table to mention price because, this theory goes, the person who speaks…
“Expectations are premeditated resentments”
"Expectations are premeditated resentments" is a saying of unknown authorship. "If the old saying that 'expectations are premeditated resentments' is true, then our…
“The room was so small, I had to go out in the hall to change my mind”
New York City apartments and hotel rooms are usually very small. "The room was so small," an old joke goes, "I had to go out in the hall to change my mind." The joke appeared in…
“Wake up and smell the tyranny”
"Wake up and smell the coffee" is a saying that has been cited in print since at least 1943. "Wake up and smell the tyranny" (urging people to be politically awake) is a saying…
“An armed man is a citizen. An unarmed man is a subject”
"An armed man is a citizen. An unarmed man is a subject" is a pro-gun slogan of unknown authorship. "An Armed Man is a Citizen, an Unarmed Man is a Subject" was a signature line…
“You’re like school in July—no class”
School is usually out in July and August, although there sometimes is summer school. "My English teacher is like school in the summertime ... no class" was cited in a 1985 book.…
“If you bought it, a truck brought it”
"If you bought it, a truck(er) brought it" is a popular bumper sticker slogan -- especially on trucks, of course. "You name it -- if you bought it, a truck brought it!" was…
“Guns don’t kill people. Abortions kill people”
"Guns don't kill people -- people kill people" has been a popular pro-gun slogan since 1959. "Guns don't kill people. Abortions kill people" is a related bumper…
“A New Yorker learns to drive by yelling ‘taxi’”
Many New Yorkers do not own cars, but prefer to take a taxi or the subway, or to just walk. A joke is that a New Yorker learns how to drive by raising an arm and hailing a taxi. The joke…
Lience (lie + science); Lientist (lie+ scientist)
Fake or bad science (or pseudo-science) has infrequently been called "lience" (lie + science), which is practiced by a "lientist" (lie +scientist). "As far as global…
“Were you married by a Justice of the Peace or the Secretary of War?” (joke)
An old joke is about a bickering couple who were married by a Justice of the Peace, but should have been married by the Secretary of War. The position of "Justice of the Peace" is not the…