"There’s no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap" is a pizza saying that has been printed on many images. The line was said by the character Doug Heffernan…
New York Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter played from 1995 until 2014. His uniform number (#2) was retired in May 2017. Jeter told Yankees Magazine in May 1996: "My folks taught me at a very…
"There's no excuse for my behavior, so I'm drinking until I have one" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on several ecards. "Clearly, there's no excuse…
A hot dog at Costco (a warehouse club retail store chain) is famous for staying at a low price (usually $1.50). It is comfort food to many people. "nothing a costco hot dog can’t fix"…
"There’s nothing a cup of coffee can’t fix. If not, make it two" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images “There’s nothing a cup of coffee can’t fix. If not, make…
A Bloody Mary joke was posted on Facebook by Pagan Humor on April 4, 2020: "There's nothing like a little tomato soup to soothe the soul. Even if it's cold. Over ice. With a celery…
"The average ghost is mean spirited" was posted on the website PunoftheDay.com on October 29, 2010. "There’s nothing more mean spirited than the average ghost" was posted on…
"When in doubt, add/drink more wine" is a wine saying that has been printed on many images. "When in doubt, add more wine" was posted on Twitter by h2orocks4001 on February 28,…
The word "brother" doesn't have anything to do with a person who makes "broth," but there are jokes. "If you look at the word 'brother' just a few times it…
"Thermopylae had her messenger of defeat, but the Alamo had none." The comparison of the events of the Alamo (1836) to the Battle of Thermopylae (480 B.C.) occurred as early as 1836. This…
"Thermostrocka Mortimer" (or "Thermostrocker Mortimer") is the broadcasting signoff of longtime Austinite Richard "Cactus" Pryor. Pryor's words are believed to be…
"These weekends are starting to feel like a 30 minute lunch break" is a saying that has been printed on many images. For many people who work weekdays, the weekend seems to go by too…
"These Black Friday sales need to get a lil blacker for me" is a saying that has been printed on many images. By "blacker," the speaker means that the sales need to be better,…
"These days govt. is a four-letter word" means that "govt." (government) can be obscene. "These govt. is a four letter word" (the word "days" appears to be…
A political correctness joke (probably NSFW) states that you cannot say "black paint." That is usually an adjective and a noun, but the joke has it as a noun and a verb. "Apparently…
"These days you gotta have a job for the bills and another job for yourself" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the economy is so bad, people need two jobs just to…
"These days you gotta have a job for the bills and another job for yourself" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the economy is so bad, people need two jobs just to…
The bird flu caused eggs to become expensive. Cadbury Creme Eggs are different than regular eggs, but there are jokes. "These egg prices better not affect the Cadbury ones" was posted on…
"Driving me bananas" usually means "driving me crazy," but some jokes involve literal driving of bananas. "First day running my family fruit and veg delivery service and my…
"Korean meatballs -- they really are the dogs bollocks" is a jocular one-liner that has been printed on many images. English comedian Hugh Dennis said on the British topical, satirical…