“If stress burned calories, I’d be a supermodel”
"If stress burned calories, I'd be a supermodel" is a jocular one-line saying about stress that has been printed on many images. "If stress burned calories, I’d be a size…
Alphebetical for "i"
“If studying history always makes you feel proud and happy, you probably aren’t studying history”
A saying about studying history was posted on Twitter by Librarianshipwreck on September 17, 2020: "Studying history will sometimes make you uncomfortable.Studying history will sometimes make…
“If stupidity got us into this mess, why can’t it get us out?”
"If stupidity got us into this mess, why can't it get us out?" is a silly saying that doesn't fully make sense -- getting out of a mess is different than getting into one. The…
“If swimming is such good exercise, explain whales”
"If swimming is such good exercise, explain whales (to me)" is a joke on many websites that has been printed on many gift items, such as T-shirts and posters. "If swimming is so good…
“If Target had a bar, I’d probably never leave”
"If Target had a bar, my life would be perfect" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. Target is a retail chain store. "If Target had a bar, it would be the…
“If Target had a bar, my life would be perfect”
"If Target had a bar, my life would be perfect" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. Target is a retail chain store. "If Target had a bar, it would be the…
“If taxation wasn’t theft, IRS agents wouldn’t need guns”
The Internal Revenue Service (IRS) has some of its agents carry guns to enforce its actions collecting revenue. "If taxation wasn’t theft, IRS agents wouldn’t need guns" was posted on…
“If taxes weren’t theft, the IRS wouldn’t need guns”
The Internal Revenue Service (IRS) has some of its agents carry guns to enforce its actions collecting revenue. "If taxation wasn’t theft, IRS agents wouldn’t need guns" was posted on…
“If tea leaves, does coffee have grounds for divorce?”
A joke has tea and coffee married: "If the tea leaves, does it give the coffee grounds for divorce?" The tea and coffee puns were cited in several newspapers in 1911. 26 May 1911, New…
“If Tetris has taught me anything, it’s that errors pile up and accomplishments disappear”
"If Tetris has taught me anything, it’s that errors pile up and accomplishments disappear" is a saying about the tile-matching puzzle video game that has been printed on several images.…
“If Texas saw many, many more tornadoes, it would be called “Vortexas’”
"VorTexas" (vortex + Texas) is a portmanteau word that is sometimes used. "#vorTexas" was posted on Twitter by Tammi Jonas on July 16, 2011. "If Texas saw many, many more…
“If that were true it would be on the news”
"If that was/were true it would be on the news" is a saying that occurs to some people when told of some event (child trafficking, food and vaccine safety, political corruption and more).…
“If the ‘germ theory of disease’ were correct, there would be nobody alive to believe it”
"If the 'germ theory of disease' were correct, there'd be no one living to believe it" or "If the 'germ theory of disease' were correct, there would be…
“If the ‘germ theory of disease’ were correct, there’d be no one living to believe it”
"If the 'germ theory of disease' were correct, there'd be no one living to believe it" or "If the 'germ theory of disease' were correct, there would be…
“If the American people ever allow private banks to control the issue of their currency…”
Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826) is sometimes quoted for having said: "If the American people ever allow private banks to control the issue of their currency, first by inflation, then by…
“If the bar ain’t bending, you’re just pretending”
"If the bar ain't bending, you're just pretending" is a weightlifting saying that has been printed on T-shirts and posters. "If the bar ain't bending, you're just…
“If the broom fits, fly it”
"If the broom fits, fly it" -- a Halloween saying referring to witches flying brooms -- has been printed on many images. It's a variation on the saying, "if the shoe fits, wear…
“If the climate were a bank, it would have been saved by now”
"If the climate were a bank, it would have been saved" is a climate change slogan that has been printed on many images. U.S. banks were bailed out in the Emergency Economic Stabilization…
“If the cops have no duty to protect you, then the only point of their existence is…”
The police have no duty to protect you, the U.S. Supreme Court has ruled. "If the cops have no duty to protect you, then the only point of their existence is to be used against you"…
“If the coronavirus doesn’t take you out, can I?”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic led to some jocular pickup lines. This was posted on Twitter by yikes on March 9, 2020: "If the coronavirus doesn’t take you out, can I?" "If…