"If stress burned calories, I'd be a…

“If stress burned calories, I’d be a supermodel” is a jocular one-line saying about stress that has been printed on many images. “If stress burned calories, I’d be a size 5!!” was posted on the newsgroup rec.crafts.textiles.needlework on April 25, 1995.

“If stress burned calories, I’d be a supermodel” has been cited in print since at least 2008.

Google Groups: rec.crafts.textiles.needlework
Flower Fairies charte
LYNDA KING
4/25/95
(...)
If stress burned calories, I’d be a size 5!!

9 June 1997, Sarasota (FL) Herald Tribune, “Taste of Tanglewood ENefits July 4 Fund” by Mary Bradberry, pg. 4B
It wasn’t such a local event for Carla and Harold Sabin of Carla’s Crafts, who traveled up from Fort Myers to participate. Their booth featured fun items carved in wood by Harold and painted with wise and humorous messages by Carla. “If stress burned calories, I’d be a size five,” read one of their plaques.

Google Groups: alt.support.divorce
Question about Topics Posted
daisy
2/12/99
(...)
If stress burned calories, I’d weight 98 pounds!

2 August 2000, Washington (DC) Post, “Voila! The Funniest T-Shirts of 2000” by Bob Levey, pg. C11, col. 2:
If Stress Burned Calories, I’d Be a Size 5.—Janet Phillips, of Springfield.

Google Books
He Who Laughs Lasts
By Shawn Lovley
Lincoln, NE: iUniverse.com
2001
Pg. 123:
If Stress Burned Calories, I’d Be a Size 5

Army of Mom
12.03.2008
Cuz that’s how I roll
(...)
and my latest is a button from the BFF:
If stress burned calories, I’d be a supermodel.

Twitter
Mrs. Gay 💄‏
@hilaryrose
If stress burned calories I’d be a fucking supermodel.
6:35 PM - 26 Mar 2009

Twitter
Dusty Kraft‏
@Dusty_Stone
dealin with a flippin headache….
“If stress burned calories I’d be a supermodel” don’t know who ssaid that but it sure is funny!
5:51 PM - 20 Apr 2009

Twitter
TED‏
@Laughbook
If stress burned calories, I’d be a supermodel.
3:35 PM - 20 Dec 2013

Google Books
War and Peach
By Susan Furlong
New York, NY: Berkley Prime Crime
2017
Pg. 209:
If stress burned calories, I’d be a supermodel by now.

Sizzle
IF STRESS BURNED CALORIES I’D BE A SUPERMODEL #FUNNYJOKESQUOTESPICTURES ☺🙋 ***18+ #ENTERTAINMENT SITE*** MEME
DANK 🤖 SITES STRESS SITE ENTERTAINMENT SUPERMODEL BURNED ENTERTAINING CALORIES
FOUND @ 2 LIKES ON 2017-01-15 17:25:44 BY SIZZLE
SOURCE: FACEBOOK