"You cannot invade the mainland United States. There would be a rifle behind each/every blade of grass" is a saying that has been printed on many images. It is credited to Japanese…
"I would never hurt/kill an animal. I'm more of a people person" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying could be a vegan or cannibal joke about eating animals…
Some people brings snacks to work, but eat them all right away. This was posted on Twitter by Ron Iver on June 21, 2022 and received over 17,400 likes: "I would never survive camping.…
"I would never try to poison you, Now eat your Pb and Jelly Sandwich" is a science joke that has been printed on many images. "Pb" stands for both "peanut butter" and…
"I would rather be covered in sweat at the gym than in clothes at the beach" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many posters. The saying was cited on Twitter on April 9,…
American conservative author and journalist William F. Buckley, Jr. (1925-2008) -- who went to Yale University -- didn't think that academics necessarily made great legislators. The New York…
"Someone once told me not to bite off more than I could chew. I said I would rather choke on greatness than nibble on mediocrity" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many…
There are many "Keep off the Grass" signs. A joke was posted on the website Tearable Puns on September 19, 2014: "I would've kept off the grass, but I don't understand sign…
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many people to use alcohol-based sanitizers on their hands. "I never thought in my entire life that my hands would consume more alcohol than my…
When a customer reaches a store's checkout, the customer is often asked if they found everything they were looking for. If a customer didn't find something, the store usually provides…
"Coffee doesn't solve all my problems, but I'm fairly confident it stops me from creating some new ones" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. The saying has…
"I wouldn't say I'm a coffee addict. I prefer the term 'exceptionally caffeine absorbent'" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The saying (shown…
An old joke is told about a big city motorist who is lost in the countryside. He asks a local how to get to a big city. (Various cities have been named in the joke.) The local tries to give him…
An old political joke (cited in print from at least 1940), has a political heckler saying, "I wouldn't vote for you if you were St. Peter himself." The politician swiftly answers…
For some people, a "to-do list" is a short list of things that they wish to do, but will not. "I’m really into writing short fiction, mainly to-do lists" was posted on…
The Singer Corporation makes sewing machines. Of course, there are jokes about musical singers. "#wokeupthismorning to compose another ditty about an old-fashioned sewing machine. That's…
An Irish poem (popular on St. Patrick's Day) is: "I-rish you a very nice place to live,I-rish God's greatest gifts he'll give.I-rish you health, and wealth, and more--I-rish…
"I, for one, like Roman numerals" -- "I'" is the Roman numeral for "one" -- is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was…
"I'd be a bum on the street with a tin cup if the markets were always efficient" was said by billionaire investor Warren Buffett and published in the April 3, 1995 issue of Fortune…
Honey bear shaped squeezable containers for honey are very popular. The first bottles were created in 1957 by Ralph and Luella Gamber, founders of Dutch Gold Honey (from Pennsylvania). Bears…