“Glass buildings are just really elaborate sand castles”
Some people compare glass buildings with sand castles -- building materials that are seemingly fragile. "GLASS BUILDINGS ARE GIANT SAND CASTLES!" was posted on Twitter on September 3,…
“What do you call a teller on a tightrope?”/“Online banking.”
A banking riddle was posted on Reddit -- 3amjokes on September 15, 2017: Q: What do you call a teller on a tightrope?A: Online banking. “Can you buy clothes pegs online?” and “Can you tell me…
“What’s red and green and wears boxing gloves?”/“A fruit punch.”
A fruit punch riddle is: Q: What's red and green and wears boxing gloves?A: A fruit punch. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2000. Google BooksSuper-Duper Good Clean Jokes for…
“The faster you climb an escalator, the more steps it takes to reach the top”
An escalator is a moving stairway, and this has led to a popular observation. "On an escalator, the faster you climb the steps the more of them you use. #escalatorwisdom" was posted on…
“Eating a cheeseburger is basically eating the cow, the cow’s milk, and the cow’s food”
A cheeseburger has meat, cheese and often lettuce. It is not kosher because of the milk and meat combination. A saying was posted on Reddit -- Shower Thoughts on September 15, 2017: "Eating a…
“Why do worms taste like chewing gum?”/“Because they’re wrigleys.”
A chewing gum riddle is: Q: Why do worms taste like chewing gum?A: Because they're wrigleys. The pun is on the word "wriggle" and "Wrigley" (a brand of chewing gum). The…
#Fedgibberish (Federal Reserve + gibberish)
"Odd She was confident a week ago. #fedgibberish" was posted on Twitter by Michael Lebowitz on July 13, 2017. "#FedGibberish!" (Federal Reserve + gibberish) by…
“How many tenors does it take to screw in a light bulb?”/“None. They can’t reach that high.”
An tenor version of the "lightbulb joke" is: Q: How many tenors does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: None. They can't reach that high. "How many tenors does it take to screw…
“You cannot pretend to play the air guitar”
"Air guitar" is pretending to play the guitar by fingering the air. "How do you pretend to play the air guitar???" was posted on Twitter on December 8, 2011. One can't…
“What is the most pirated Apple product?”/“iPatch.”
A joke about Apple Inc. is: Q: What is the most pirated Apple product?A: iPatch (eyepatch). The joke was posted on Reddit -- 3amjokes on September 13, 2017. Forms of the "iPatch" joke had…
“How can you tell when a tenor is really stupid?”/“When the other tenors notice.”
A tenor riddle is: Q: How can you tell when a tenor is really stupid?A: When the other tenors notice. The tenor joke was posted on the newsgroup rec.music.classical on May 5, 1993. Wikipedia:…
“Unlocking your phone with facial recognition must suck if you’re a twin”
Many computer systems have facial recognition software, but does the system work for identical twins? Some facial recognition systems claim that twins can be recognized. The issue was discussed…
“What’s the difference between an ass-kisser and a brown noser?”/“Depth perception.”
A joke about bootlickers or sycophants has been printed on several images: Q: What's the difference between an ass-kisser and a brown noser?A: Depth perception. The joke has been cited in…
“What do you call a high-priced barber shop?”/“A clip joint.”
A barbershop riddle is: Q: What do you call a high-priced barber shop?A: A clip joint. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1976. Many barber shops have used the "Clip Joint"…
“I tried to change my password to ‘beefstew,’ but it wasn’t stroganoff”
"Stroganoff" sounds like "strong enough," and a pun is: "I tried to change my password to 'beefstew,' but it wasn't stroganoff." The joke was posted on…
“I tried to change my password to ‘beefstew,’ but it wasn’t stroganoff”
"Stroganoff" sounds like "strong enough," and a pun is: "I tried to change my password to 'beefstew,' but it wasn't stroganoff." The joke was posted on…
“Oysters have always been on my shuck-it list”
Some people have a "bucket list," but what about a "shuck-it list"? "The Hot Oyster added to the 'Shuck-it List' today is the Wallace Bay" was posted on…
“When it comes to sneaking chocolate into the movies, I have a couple Twix up my sleeve”
The Twix chocolate bar has had a few puns, such as a magician having Twix (tricks) up his sleeve. "One laugh on all of NBC's Thursday night shows: Twix up my sleeve. Ruined by being in…
“When you’re out of shape, all training is weight training”
"When you're out of shape, all training is weight training" is a saying that was posted on Reddit -- Shower Thoughts on September 12, 2017. The saying became popular on Twitter.…
“Hamburger patties are really just meatloaf cookies”
"Hamburger patties are really just meatloaf cookies" was posted on Reddit -- Shower Thoughts on September 13, 2017. The saying quickly became popular on Twitter. Reddit -- Shower…