Volmageddon (volatility + Armageddon)
"Volmageddon" (volatility + Armageddon) is a portmanteau financial term that was popularized in February 2018. "First Volmageddon Casualties Emerge: One Hedge Fund Down As Much As…
Center for Disease Creation (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention or CDC nickname)
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) is, according to Wikipedia, the leading national public health institute of the United States. Some critics believe that the CDC works too…
“I would like monkey bars a lot more if they were more like places where monkeys got really drunk”
"Monkey bars" -- a piece of playground equipment also called a "jungle gym" -- do not serve alcohol. A jocular one-line saying was posted on Twitter on June 12, 2011: "I…
“You know it’s tax season when you see a dancing Statue of Liberty on the street corner”
Liberty Tax Service began in 1998; in 2004, it employed people dressed as the Statue of Liberty to stand on sidewalks and bring in customers. For many people, it's a sign that it's tax…
World Homicide Organization (World Health Organization or WHO nickname)
The World Health Organization (WHO) is a specialized agency of the United Nations concerned with public health. Some critics have claimed that WHO carries out a depopulation agenda of the United…
“I would like monkey bars a lot more if they were more like places where monkeys got really drunk”
"Monkey bars" -- a piece of playground equipment also called a "jungle gym" -- do not serve alcohol. A jocular one-line saying was posted on Twitter on June 12, 2011: "I…
“What’s the best day to eat bacon?”/“Fry-day.”
A bacon riddle is: Q: What's the best day to eat bacon (and eggs)?A: Fry-day. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2003. “What day does an Easter egg hate the…
Environmental Poisoning Agency (Environmental Protection Agency or EPA nickname)
The United States Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) was created to protect human health and the environment, but some critics believe that the agency doesn't fulfill that purpose. The EPA…
“You know it’s tax season when you see a dancing Statue of Liberty on the street corner”
Liberty Tax Service began in 1998; in 2004, it employed people dressed as the Statue of Liberty to stand on sidewalks and bring in customers. For many people, it's a sign that it's tax…
“What do you call a girl who works in a sunbed shop?”/“Tanya.”
The name "Tanya" sounds like "tan ya/you." A riddle has been cited in print since at least 2002: Q: What do you call the woman who operates your sun-bed?A: Tanya. "What do…
“Why do kittens make good announcers?”/“Because they have wee paws for station identification.”
"We pause for station identification" has been said by radio announcers for many years. A riddle has been cited in print since at least 1940: Q: Why does a radio announcer have small…
“Celery farmers play the stalk market”
The stock market is sometimes punned as the "stalk" market. The "stalk market" puns have included bean, celery and corn jokes. "Q: How did the corn plant lose all her…
“We’ll, we’ll, we’ll, if it isn’t autocorrect”
"Well, well, well" is a common interjection. "We'll, we'll, we'll, if it isn;t autocorrect" is a joke that has been printed on many images. The joke was posted on…
“A peanut sat on a railroad track. His heart was all a-flutter…”
A popular quatrain about a peanut being squashed into peanut butter has been cited in print since at least January 1922: "A peanut sat on a railroad trackHis heart was all a-flutter,Along came…
“Peeling a fruit is like unwrapping a gift from the earth”
A fruit's peel is like gift wrapping. "Peeling fruit is like opening a gift from the Earth" was posted on Reddit -- Highdeas on August 29, 2017. "Peeling a fruit is like…
“When one door closes, sometimes you want to get a hammer and nails to make sure that stays shut”
"When one door closes, another opens" is an old saying about an opportunity lost and one gained. A joke about ending a bad experience was posted on Twitter by CherrySlushie on December…
“What surfs the internet and goes, ‘Choo, Choo’?”/“Thomas the Search Engine.”
An internet riddle is: Q: What surfs the internet and goes, "Choo, Choo"?A: Thomas the Search Engine. The pun is on the fictional steam locomotive Thomas the Tank Engine. "Thomas the…
“When I was at school, people used to throw gold bars at me. I was the victim of bullion”
Some people at school are victims of bullying. English comedian Tim Vine has used this joke in his act since at least 2008: "When I was at school, people used to throw gold bars at me. I was…
“Where do beans invest their money?”/“The stalk market.”
The stock market is sometimes punned as the "stalk" market. The "stalk market" puns have included bean, celery and corn jokes. "Q: How did the corn plant lose all her…
“Studying is my drug. But thank God I say no to drugs”
"Studying is my drug. But thank God I say no to drugs" is a jocular anti-studying saying that has been printed on several images. "Studying is my drug" was posted on Twitter on…