“I ate a kid’s meal at McDonald’s for lunch. His mom was furious”
"I ate a kid's meal at Macdonalds earlier today. His mum was furious" was posted on Facebook by Rob Savant on November 9, 2020. "I ate a kid's meal at McDonalds this…
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“Accidentally drank invisible ink… I’m now in hospital, waiting to be seen”
People who go to a hospital often wait to be seen, but what if being seen was the problem? "I accidentally drank a bottle of invisible ink last night. I'm now in hospital, waiting to be…
“You cannot use all-purpose flour for all purposes”
"All-purpose flour" (also called "AP flour") can be used for baking many things, although professional bakers usually use other flours. All-purpose flour is not good for…
“All-purpose flour has a limited number of uses”
"All-purpose flour" (also called "AP flour") can be used for baking many things, although professional bakers usually use other flours. All-purpose flour is not good for…
“I went to the worst escape room ever. It’s called IKEA”
The IKEA furniture store can be confusing to many people, who have compared it to leaving an escape room. "Me all the time: this IKEA is the worst escape room ever." was posted on Twitter…
“If you say AT&T backwards you sound like a Canadian bomb technician” (joke)
AT&T Inc. is the world's largest telecommunications company and also the world's largest media and entertainment company. An AT&T joke was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on November…
“What do you call a domestic animal you keep in your vehicle?”/“Carpet.”
A "carpet" should not be confused with a "car pet," but there are jokes. "Tumbled: 'If you were to keep an animal in your vehicle, is it a carpet?'" was…
“My intellectual property is in foreclosure”
"My intellectual property is in foreclosure" is a jocular way of saying that one is not thinking straight. "My intellectual property is in foreclosure./@avi1111" was posted on…
“Sugar is just gay salt”
Sugar has often been compared to salt. Both are white, but sugar is “sweeter,” while salt is “salty.” "Sugar is just gay salt" is a saying that has been printed on many images.…
“The word ‘cheese’ is cancelled. Everyone must now call it a loaf of milk”
Cheese (except for vegan cheese) is usually derived from milk. "THE WORD 'CHEESE' IS CANCELLED everyone must now call it a loaf of milk" Was posted on Facebook by Callum…
“Cheese is just a loaf of milk”
Cheese (except for vegan cheese) is usually derived from milk. "THE WORD 'CHEESE' IS CANCELLED everyone must now call it a loaf of milk" Was posted on Facebook by Callum…
“What do you call a silent kebab?”/“A shh-kebab.”
A shish kebab riddle is: Q: What do you call a silent kebab?A: A shh-kebab. The riddle was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on October 26, 2011. Wikipedia: Shish kebabShish kebab is a popular meal of…
“Chiron was a half human/half horse doctor, which made him the Centaur for Disease Control”
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) is a national public health institute. The Greek mythological figure of Chiron as the "Centaur of Disease Control" is a joke on the…
“I’m working on a fitness routine for insects. It’s OK, but I’m still trying to work out the bugs”
The expression "work out the bugs" means to remove defects, but a joke takes the words literally. "I'm working on a fitness routine for insects. It's going well, but…
“Waffles are just pancakes with bones”
"Waffles are Pancakes with bones" was posted on Twitter by Kenny Garcia on July 25, 2017. The saying doesn't make literal sense because neither pancakes nor waffles have any bones.…
“I definitely learned my lesson about speeding today. I just showed up to work 20 minutes early”
One disadvantage of speeding -- besides potentially getting a speeding ticket -- is that the driver might arrive at a destination too early. "I definitely learned my lesson about speeding…
“Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy”
"Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Ambition a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be…
“Ambition is for people who don’t have enough sense to be lazy”
"Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Ambition a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be…
“Rapunzel was quarantined and met her future husband so let’s think positively here”
The 2020 COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic resulted in some quarantines. A joke was posted on Twitter by sam fischer on March 15, 2020: "Let’s not forget that rapunzel was quarantined and met…
“The whole country would be tested by midnight if Chick-fil-A was running the drive-thru”
"The whole country would be tested by midnight if Chick-fil-A was running the drive-thru testing centers" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The say was popular in…