“I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded”
"I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded" is a pun that was posted on the newsgroup alt.tasteless.jokes on February 23, 2001. Blankets are folded frequently. “I used to run…
“I used to work in a diving school, but the company went under”
A company that's bankrupt and closes is said to have "gone under" (as if buried). There are several diving company/school jokes. "Friend's had to cancel his deep sea diving…
“I used to work in a shoe-recycling shop. It was sole-destroying”
Is working in a shoe shop "sole-destroying"? "I think I'll leave the shoe shop soon and find a better paying job"/"One that's not so sole-destroying?" was…
“I used to work in a tiddlywinks factory, but it was counter productive”
Some jobs are "counter productive, but what if it's a job making counters? "My dad used to work in a tiddlywink factory. But he didn’t like it. He said it was counter…
“I used to work in a watch factory. I sat around making faces all day”
A watch has a face, and there is a very old joke about that. "I have two jobs open. I've got a chance to go making faces in a watch factory or drawing mugs in a beer hall" was…
“I used up all my sick days, so I called in dead” (workplace saying)
"I used up all my sick days, so I called in dead" (or "I ran out of sick days, so I called in dead") is an office saying that has been printed on many gift items, such as…
“I wake up with a good attitude every day. Then idiots happen”
"I wake up with a good attitude every day. Then idiots happen" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I wake up with a good attitude everyday, but then idiots…
“I wake up with a good attitude every morning. Then idiots happen”
"I wake up with a good attitude every day. Then idiots happen" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I wake up with a good attitude everyday, but then idiots…
“I wanna be nice, but then people happen”
"I wanna be nice, but then people happen" is a saying that has been printed on many images. FacebookMore Crazy StuffMarch 30, 2023 at 5:58 PM · (The following text is shown on an image.…
“I want to be a nice person, but everyone is just so stupid”
"I want to be a nice person, but everyone is just so stupid" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I want to be a nice person, but people are just so fucking…
“I want to be a nice person, but everyone is so stupid”
"I want to be a nice person, but everyone is just so stupid" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I want to be a nice person, but people are just so fucking…
“I want to be a nice person, but people are so stupid”
"I want to be a nice person, but everyone is just so stupid" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I want to be a nice person, but people are just so fucking…
“I want to open a two dollar store for people that enjoy the finer things”
What's classier than a dollar store? "I want to open a two dollar store for people that enjoy the finer things" is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images.…
“I wanted to be a stenographer, but they told me they are not short-handed at the moment”
A stenography pun is: "I wanted to be a stenographer, but they told me they are not short-handed at the moment." The "short-handed" joke has been cited in print since at least…
“I wanted to do panic buying, I checked my account… I can only panic”
The 2019–20 coronavirus outbreak caused panic buying in many stores. "U can only panic buy if ur loaded. I won't be panic buying" was posted on Twitter by jacqueline shirley on…
“I wanted to do some panic buying today, but after checking my bank account all I can do is panic”
The 2019–20 coronavirus outbreak caused panic buying in many stores. "U can only panic buy if ur loaded. I won't be panic buying" was posted on Twitter by jacqueline shirley on…
“I wanted to give a fuck today, but it clashes with my outfit”
"I wanted to give a fuck today, but it clashes with my outfit" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I wanted to give a fuck today but it clashes with my…
“I wanted to place a bid at the silent auction, but it was not aloud”
A joke about a silent auction was posted on the website Pun of the Day on May 20, 2018: "I wanted to bid at the silent auction, but it was not aloud." The bid was not "aloud" (a…
“I was a rubbish church window cleaner. I got rid of all the stains”
Many churches have stained windows. "I was a rubbish church window cleaner. I got rid of all the stains" was printed in The Biggest Ever Tim Vine Joke Book (2010) by English writer,…
“I was dismissed from my job as an apprentice executioner because I just couldn’t get the hang of it”
Some people who work or who go to school can't "get the hang of it" (understand it). This expression usually has nothing to do with hanging, but there are jokes. "Why was the…