“Nobody goes there anymore. It’s too crowded” (restaurant joke)
"Nobody goes there anymore -- it's too crowded" is supposedly New York Yankee baseball great Yogi Berra's statement about a popular restaurant. Yogi might have said it, but he…
“Nobody wants to even LOOK at the dessert menu anymore and that’s the problem with society”
Many people go to restaurants and don't even look at the dessert menu. This was posted on X/Twitter by reversecowgirl69 on Mavch 16, 2025, and received over 222,000 likes: "nobody wants…
“Not all relationships will lead to marriage. Some will help you discover new restaurants”
"Not all relationships will lead to marriage. Some will help you discover new restaurants" (or "Most relationships won't lead to marriage, but at least they help you find new…
“Not to brag, but I’ve satisfied every waitress that’s ever served me. With just the tip”
A sex/restaurant joke was posted on Twitter by Ducks_The_Delirious on January 11, 2015: "Not to brag, but I’ve satisfied every waitress that's ever served me. With just the tip."…
“Nothing is more humbling than when you see your face in the self checkout camera”
No one seems to look good in a store's self checkout camera. This has the reputation for making people look even worse than passport photos or driver's license photos. "I never look…
“Nothing refreshes my memory of what I need at the grocery store like…”
"Nothing refreshes my memory of what I need at the grocery store like coming home from the grocery store" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. People remember what…
“Nothing says ‘I mean business’ like using a shopping cart at the liquor store”
"Nothing says 'I mean business' like using a shopping cart at the liquor store" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the person is buying more than just a…
“Nothing should go on top of a burger bun. It’s dry on purpose so you can hold it. Stop it, trendy restaurants”
Some restaurants pour cheese sauce or steak sauce on top of a burger bun. "NOTHING SHOULD BE ON TOP OF A BURGER BUN. ITS DRY ON PURPOSE SO YOU CAN HOLD IT. STOP IT TRENDY RESTAURANTS" was…
“Notice: No service will be provided at this bar to anyone on a horse” (bar sign)
"Notice: No service will be provided at this bar to anyone on a horse" is a bar sign that supposedly was displayed in saloons of old. However, ""No service will be provided at…
“Nowadays, an after-dinner mint is what you need to pay the restaurant check”
Many fine dining restaurants offer after-dinner mints, suggesting a pun on the word "mint": "Nowadays, an after-dinner mint is what you need to pay the restaurant check"…
“Oedipus and Midas walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A Greek mythology version was posted on both Reddit -- Dadjokes and Reddit -- Jokes on…
“Oedipus, Aphrodite and Midas walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A Greek mythology version was posted on both Reddit -- Dadjokes and Reddit -- Jokes on…
“Oh my god, I haven’t seen or thought about you in 20 years. Let’s hang out in the middle of the grocery aisle and catch up!”
Many people meet long-lost acquaintances at a supermarket. They then chat and clog the aisle. "When u bump into some1 uknow in a supermarket, make sure to catch up in the middle of the fukin…
“Olive Garden is the Italian version of Applebee’s”
Olive Garden is an American casual dining restaurant chain, serving Americanized versions of Italian food. It has been compared to Applebee's, a chain restaurant serving American food.…
“Olive Garden waitress asks me to “say when” and begins to grate parmesan on my salad…”
"Waitress says 'Say when' when grating my cheese. I never say when. The room fills with parmesan. There are no survivors" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many…
“Once I got a job I realized my mom was right, we did have food at home”
"Once I started spending my own money, I realized mom was right. We do have food at home" (eating at home -- and saving money -- rather than eating at a restaurant) is a jocular line that…
“Once I got a job, I realized mom was right. We do have food at home”
"Once I started spending my own money, I realized mom was right. We do have food at home" (eating at home -- and saving money -- rather than eating at a restaurant) is a jocular line that…
“Once I started spending my own money, I realized mom was right. We do got food at home”
"Once I started spending my own money, I realized mom was right. We do have food at home" (eating at home -- and saving money -- rather than eating at a restaurant) is a jocular line that…
“Once I started spending my own money, I realized mom was right. We do have food at home”
"Once I started spending my own money, I realized mom was right. We do have food at home" (eating at home -- and saving money -- rather than eating at a restaurant) is a jocular line that…
“One of the worst jobs in the world is to be a fruit stand vendor in action movie”
An action movie cliché is the car chase, and a car always seems to drive into a fruit stand on the sidewalk. "Apart from the above, my major gripe is with the pointless car chase, in which…