“What did the full glass say to the empty glass?”/“You look drunk!”
Is an empty glass drunk? "What did the full glass say to the empty glass? 'You look drunk'"" was posted on Twitter by 𝑀𝒾𝒸𝓀 on June 18, 2019. "What did the…
“What did the garlic dip say to the French fries?”/“Aioli have eyes for you.”
"Aioli have eyes for you #kitchensongs" was posted on Twitter by Sue on May 24, 2010. The joke is a pun on the famous song "I Only Have Eyes for You" (1934), by composer Harry…
“What did the gingerbread man put on his bed?”/“A cookie sheet.”
A popular winter joke for children is: Q: What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?A: A cookie sheet. The joke has been cited in print since at least 1998. Google BooksBest Riddle Book EverBy…
“What did the grape say to the peanut butter?”/“‘Tis the season to be jelly.”
The Christmas carol "Deck the Halls: has the lyric, "'Tis the season to be jolly." A riddle was cited in print in 1978: Q: What did one grape say to the other grape?A: 'Tis…
“What did the grape say when it was crushed?” (joke)
"What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?" begins a joke that has been cited in print since at least 1964. "Nothing. It just gave a little wine." The joke has…
“What did the green grape say to the purple grape?”/“Breathe!”
A popular children's joke about grapes is: Q: What did the green grape say to the purple grape?A: Breathe! The joke has been cited in print since at least 2007. 28 November 2007, Wisconsin…
“What did the hamburger say when it pleaded ‘not guilty’?”/“I’ve been flamed!”
A hamburger riddle is: Q: What did the hamburger say when it pleaded "not guilty"?A: "I've been flamed!" The hamburger joke has been cited in print since at least 1978.…
“What did the hot dog say when he crossed the finish line?”/“I’m the wiener!”
A hot dog "wiener" pun is: Q: What did the hot dog say when he crossed the finish line?A: "I'm the wiener!" The joke has been cited in print since at least 1992. 8 March…
“What did the husband do after forgetting his wife’s birthday?”/“Cauliflower shop!”
"Cauliflower" sounds like "call a flower." A riddle is: Q: What did the husband do after forgetting his wife's birthday?A: Cauliflower shop! A "cauliflower shop"…
“What did the intergalactic cookie say to the other intergalactic cookie?”/“Beam me up biscotti.”
The Star Trek television series and movies include an engineer character named Scott (Scotty), to whom the other characters often request to "beam" them up (transport them). "Beam me…
“What did the Italian say after he ate an eel pizza?”/“That’s a moray.”
The 1953 song "That's Amore" has the famous line, "When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie that's amore!" The Italian word "amore" means…
“What did the Jedi order at the Italian restaurant?”/“Only one cannoli.”
Obi-Wan "Ben" Kenobi is a fictional character in the Star Wars movie franchise. "Only one cannoli" is a food take-off on the name that has been cited in print since at least…
“What did the lettuce say to the celery?”/“Quit stalking me!”
A popular pun about the celery stalk is: Q: What did the lettuce say to the celery?A: Quite stalking me! A form of the joke was printed in Boys' Life magazine in May 1985. Google BooksMay…
“What did the man ask the Jamaican chef?”/“What Jamaican?”
A joke about Jamaican cooking is: Q: What did the man ask the Jamaican chef?A: What Jamaican (what are you making)? "JAMAICAN: My son came up to me when I was cooking and asked, 'Hey,…
“What did the mom coffee bean say to the kid coffee bean?”/“You’re grounded.”
Entry in progress -- B.P. TwitterCoffee Folk@coffeefoIkWhat did the mom coffee bean say to the kid coffee bean? You're grounded.5:57 PM - 5 May 2018
“What did the monster say to the Thanksgiving turkey?”/“Pleased to eat you.”
A Thanksgiving turkey riddle is: Q: What did the monster say to the Thanksgiving turkey?A: "Pleased to eat you." The riddle was posted to the newsgroup alt.humor.puns on November 29,…
“What did the noodle say when leaving the room?”/“Pasta la vista, baby!”
A pasta riddle is: Q: What did the noodle say when leaving the room?A: "Pasta la vista, baby!" "Pasta la vista" is a portmanteau of "pasta" and "hasta la…
“What did the nut say when it was chasing the other nut?”/“I’m a cashew.”
A cashew riddle is: Q: What did the nut say when it was chasing the other nut?A: "I'm a cashew (catch you)." The joke was posted on Twitter by Spooky Dad Jokes‏ on September 14,…
“What did the pancake say to the baseball player?”/“Batter up!”
A baseball riddle is: Q: What did the pancake say to the baseball player?A: "Batter up!" The riddle has been cited in print since at least 1997. “How is a baseball team like a…
“What did the Pilgrims use to bake cakes?”/“May-flour.”
A Thanksgiving food riddle is: Q: What did the Pilgrims use to bake cakes?A: May-flour. "What did the Pilgrims use to bake cakes? May-flour!" was posted on Twitter on November 25, 2009.…