Packets of ham have a certain smell, and some people believe that farts are added before a package is sealed. "It must be the weirdest job in the world putting farts in packets of ham #random…
A Bloody Mary cocktail is made with vodka and tomato juice -- not spaghetti sauce -- but there are jokes. "A Bloody Mary is basically drinking spaghetti sauce mixed with vodka" was posted…
"Someone keeps putting vegetables in my/the beer crisper" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Urban Dictionarybeer crisperthe bottom drawer in a refrigerator used as the…
A "pulse" can mean a palpable beat of an artery, and a "pulse" can also mean an edible seed of the legume family. A joke confuses the two meanings. "*working in…
"Brut" (very dry, said of wine) shouldn't be confused with "brute," but there are jokes. "Brut force" is a pun on "brute force." "I knocked a guy…
"Much obliged" is sometimes joked as "matcha-bliged," with a pun on "matcha" (a finely ground powder of specially grown and processed green tea leaves). "The next…
"Someone offered me grapes, but I declined. I'm not used to consuming wine in pill form" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "'Someone offered me…
"Someone please call 9 Wine Wine" -- a wine joke on a "911" emergency call -- is a saying that has been printed on many images. "DIAL 9-WINE-WINE: When in pain, call the…
"Herb traders are thyme travelers" is a jocular one-line saying that was posted on Twitter by Glenn Fleishman on March 7, 2016. A similar saying was posted on Reddit -- Shower Thoughts…
Hellmann's is a popular brand of mayonnaise. There are, of course, "hell man" jokes. "My girlfriend just threw mayonnaise at me, what the Hellman" was posted on Twitter by…
"A salt" sounds like "assault," and there are sodium chloride jokes that have been printed on many images. "Some one just threw a bag of sodium Chloride at me! That's…
“He said, ‘You remind me of a pepper pot.’ I said, ‘I’ll take that as a condiment’” is a joke that has been told by many British comedians. There are other condiment variations.…
“He said, ‘You remind me of a pepper pot.’ I said, ‘I’ll take that as a condiment’” is a joke that has been told by many British comedians. There are other condiment variations.…
Some people believe in magic circles. "A ring of salt will protect you" (or "A circle of salt will protect you") has been printed on many images. "A ring of salt will…
“He said, ‘You remind me of a pepper pot.’ I said, ‘I’ll take that as a condiment’” is a joke that has been told by many British comedians. There are other condiment variations.…
"Super fish oil" sounds like "superficial." A joke was posted on Twitter on July 31, 2011: "Someone's just thrown a bottle of Omega 3 tablets at me. I only received…
"Stollen" is a German fruit bread, often served at Christmas. There are many puns with stollen and "stolen." "Thought of a new recipe for a cake with marzipan and sultanas.…
"There must be something in the water" is a jocular statement, guessing that the water is responsible for unusual conditions in a locality. "There must be something in the water at…
"Cook/Cooked/Cooking with love" is a common expression, usually referring to slow fast (as opposed to fast food). People often wonder if there is an opposite expression. "Oh, really?…
"Sometimes I drink water (just) to surprise my liver" is a jocular drinking saying that has been printed on many images. "Today I am gonna surprise my liver, I'm gonna drink…