There are many excuses for not taking a morning jog. "Ever noticed how it's always early morning joggers or dog owners that find dead bodies? Think that's a reason to not jog and own…
"Monkey bars" -- a piece of playground equipment also called a "jungle gym" -- do not serve alcohol. A jocular one-line saying was posted on Twitter on June 12, 2011: "I…
"I would rather be covered in sweat at the gym than in clothes at the beach" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many posters. The saying was cited on Twitter on April 9,…
Many women like the strong, silent type of man. "Women say they like the strong silent type. So basically a bodybuilder mime" was posted on X/Twitter by Sofa King Cool ✇ on January 8,…
"I'm going to the gym now. I'm not bragging, I just want you to know where to send the ambulance" is a jocular saying that has been pinted on many images. "@Professor_Ryan:…
"I'm not good at push ups, pull ups, or sit ups. I'm pretty good at fuck ups though" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Im ok when it comes to sit…
"I'm not slow. I'm just getting my money's worth from the entry fee" is a jocular running saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Twitter on…
"I'm not yawning. I'm doing face yoga" is a jocular saying that has been printed on a T-shirt. "I'm not yawning. I'm doing face yoga" was posted on Twitter…
"I'm really into crossfit. I cross my fingers and hope my ass fits in those jeans" is a jocular line that has been printed on many images. "Yeah I do Crossfit.... I CROSS my…
"I'm running in a 0.0000005K run to raise awareness for laziness" was posted on Twitter by thotrey hepurn on February 16, 2017. That is, the lazy person is barely moving at all, just…
Many people jog/run with their dogs. "I can't run fast enough to take my dog jogging, so I got a pet turtle" was posted on Facebook by Mark Renfroe on December 15, 2017.…
A joke about running the marathon was cited on reddit in November 2015: Me: "I'm thinking about running a marathon again."Her: "Wow, you have ran a marathon before?"Me:…
"I'm walking on sunshine woahhhh I'm walking on sunshine woahhh wait it's a treadmill ..." was posted on Twitter by Anna Craig on April 9, 2010. The song "Walking on…
The expression "work out the bugs" means to remove defects, but a joke takes the words literally. "I'm working on a fitness routine for insects. It's going well, but…
People work out to "see some definition," such as muscles coming out from what used to be fat. "Been bench pressing dictionaries, starting to see some definition in my arms..."…
"I've been hiding from exercise. I'm in the fitness protection program" '' a pun on "witness protection program" -- is a jocular saying that has been printed…
"Instead of John, I call my bathroom Jim. That way it sounds better when I say I went to the Jim first thing this morning" is a jocular gym saying that has been printed on many images.…
Many people who wear jogging bottoms do not jog. "for years i preached hate against the types who wear jogging bottoms when they obviously do not jog... now, i wear them too (in…
"I'm really into crossfit. I cross my fingers and hope my ass fits in those jeans" is a jocular line that has been printed on many images. "Yeah I do Crossfit.... I CROSS my…
Someone is in good shape when an old piece of clothing still fits, right? This joke was posted on Twitter by Sickipedia_Feed on October 4, 2011 (originally on the Sickipedia website) and has been…