"I would get up early and jog in the morning, but I…

There are many excuses for not taking a morning jog. “Ever noticed how it’s always early morning joggers or dog owners that find dead bodies? Think that’s a reason to not jog and own a cat” was posted on Twitter on October 14, 2011.

“I would get up early and jog in the morning, but I don’t want to be the guy to find the dead bodies” was posted on Reddit—Shower Thoughts on August 20, 2017.

TV Tropes
Joggers Find Death
“It’s the joggers I don’t trust, they’re always the ones to find the bodies!”
— Bill Bailey
The health-conscious analog of Disposable Vagrant. Joggers have a tendency of being the target of Serial Killers, muggers, and monsters in the woods. Similarly, they are also the most likely to discover the victims of all of the above.

Why joggers? Because it can be a solitary activity and this can be played for scares by making audiences relate to the solitude and helplessness when danger strikes. Recent technology (starting from the Walkman days) has graciously provided joggers with means of distracting their ears as well, making them easier targets. Similarly, joggers are drawn to nature and secluded locations, both of which make for good places to snatch victims or dump bodies, and are often out first thing in the morning when everyone else is sleeping in.

The Onion (satirical website)
February 12, 2007
Nation’s Joggers Sick Of Finding Dead Bodies
CHICAGO—Citing the sobering statistic that over 10,000 of the 12,800 slayings in the United States in 2006 were reported by joggers, a national coalition of fitness enthusiasts called upon government officials Tuesday to impose measures that would reduce the likelihood of runners discovering lifeless bodies.

YouTube
Joggers and Dead Bodies theory
communitychannel
Published on Aug 23, 2008

Twitter
Selena‏
@MancSel
Ever noticed how it’s always early morning joggers or dog owners that find dead bodies? Think that’s a reason to not jog and own a cat
8:24 AM - 14 Oct 2011

Twitter
TalentlessMedia.com‏
@TalentlessCook
I don’t jog, mainly because joggers are the ones that ‘find’ dead bodies early in the morning…and I’m lazy…oh yeah..cupcakes!
9:15 PM - 7 Nov 2013

Twitter
Liz Lemon‏
@nicolegalvagni
I will never jog early in the morning solely because I don’t want to find any dead bodies
8:31 AM - 25 Sep 2016

Reddit—Shower Thoughts
I would get up early and jog in the morning, but I don’t want to be the guy to find the dead bodies.
submitted August 20, 2017 by LiveTwoWin

Twitter
RandomFun!‏
@RandomFun_
I would get up early and jog in the morning, but I don’t want to be the guy to find the dead bodies.
6:48 PM - 20 Aug 2017

Twitter
Shower Thoughts‏
@Thoughts4Shower
I would get up early and jog in the morning, but I don’t want to be the guy to find the dead bodies.
#showerthoughts
6:54 PM - 20 Aug 2017

“I would get up early and jog in the morning, but I don’t want to be the guy to find dead bodies”