“I thought they said 1.31 miles” (half marathon joke)
A half marathon is 13.1 miles. "I thought they said 1.31 miles" (or "I thought it was 1.31 miles") is a joke that has been printed on many images. "13.1?!??! I thought you…
“I told my cycologist about you”
"Cycologist" sounds like "psychologist," but means a "cycling" or "spinning" teacher/instructor. "Cycle clinics with 'cycologist' Mal…
“I took a dehumidifier into a sauna, just to see which one would win”
"#MaybeLaterWeCould take a dehumidifier into a sauna just to see which one wins" is a jocular sayin tat was posted on Twitter by Stephen Cookson on July 3, 2017. "I once took a…
“I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it”
"I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it" is a jocular line that has been printed on ecards. "I used to have a fear of hurdles, but i got over it" was cited on…
“I want abs, but I want ice cream more”
"I want abs, but I want ice cream more" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "People need to understand the difference between wants and needs. I want abs, but I need…
“I wanted to go jogging but Proverbs 28:1 says, ‘the wicked run when no one is chasing them’”
"I wanted to go jogging but Proverbs 28:1 says, 'the wicked run when no one is chasing them,' so there's that" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The…
“I wanted to go running but Proverbs 28:1 says, ‘the wicked run when no one is chasing them’”
"I wanted to go jogging but Proverbs 28:1 says, 'the wicked run when no one is chasing them,' so there's that" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The…
“I was feeling bad about my code so I went outside and take a run…” (joke)
"If ever you're feeling sad, just go for a run" might, at first, seem like good advice. However, a joke often follows this. "If you’re ever sad, just go for a run. Then…
“I was going to post about my afternoon run, but I was autocorrected to afternoon rum”
"Run" and "rum" should not be confused. "@BKnockin afternoon run or rum? I like the latter ;)" was posted on Twitter by Michelle “MBennz” Bennett on January 5,…
“I was thinking of running a marathon…” (joke)
"Running a marathon" usually means running in a marathon, not running the marathon. Jordan Brookes joked on Twitter on May 12, 2014: "I'd like to run a marathon but it seems…
“I was told that exercise helps with your decision making” (joke)
Does exercise help the mind? A joke is: "I was told that exercise helps with your decision making. It's true. After going to the gym earlier, I've decided I'm never going…
“I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere”
"I wasn't planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere" is a jocular line about running that has been printed on many images. "I wasn't planning on…
“I wear a mask while jogging. It’s a running gag”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in some requirements to wear face masks. Many people felt gagged by the masks. "I wear a mask while jogging. It's a running gag" was…
“I went for a run, but came back home after 5 minutes because I forgot something..”
"I went for a run, but came back home after 5 minutes because I forgot something. I forgot that I'm fat and can't run for more than 5 minutes" was posted on Twitter by…
“I went to the doctors and asked what was the best exercise to lose weight…”
People often ask about "the best exercise to lose weight." There are at least two ways, and they both involve saying "no" to food. “'The best exercise I know of,'…
“I wish I could drop my body off at the gym and pick it back up when it’s ready”
"I wish I could drop my body off at the gym and pick it back up when it's ready" is a gym saying that has been printed on many images. "I want to drop my body off at the gym…
“I wish we could donate body fat to those in need”
"I wish we could donate body fat to those in need" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I think it should be possible for people to donate excess body fat to those in…
“I wish we could donate bodyfat to those in need”
"I wish we could donate body fat to those in need" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I think it should be possible for people to donate excess body fat to those in…
“I would get up early and jog in the morning, but I don’t want to be the guy to find dead bodies”
There are many excuses for not taking a morning jog. "Ever noticed how it's always early morning joggers or dog owners that find dead bodies? Think that's a reason to not jog and own…
“I would like monkey bars a lot more if they were more like places where monkeys got really drunk”
"Monkey bars" -- a piece of playground equipment also called a "jungle gym" -- do not serve alcohol. A jocular one-line saying was posted on Twitter on June 12, 2011: "I…