“Having just punched a midget selling watches, I know I’ve hit an all time low”
A pun about time is: "Having just punched a midget selling watches, I know I've hit an all time low." The joke was posted on Twitter on May 17, 2010. TwitterSidi…
“Having one of those ‘just tried to lock the house with my car remote’ days”
The car remote (key fob) can't lock the house, but many people get this confused. "Just tried unlocking the house with my car remote. Unsurprisingly it didn't work. Did have to go…
“Hell hath no fury like a child whose sibling just pressed the elevator button”
"Hell hath no fury like a child whose sibling just pressed/pushed the elevator button" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Children who get in elevators often fight to press…
“Hell hath no fury like a child whose sibling just pushed the elevator button”
"Hell hath no fury like a child whose sibling just pressed/pushed the elevator button" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Children who get in elevators often fight to press…
“Here’s a house without a flaw” (real estate joke)
"Here is a house without a flaw," says a real estate agent in the old joke. "Gosh, what do you walk on?" responds the prospective client, mistaking "flaw" for…
“Historic preservationists make it last longer” (bumper sticker)
A popular meme in the late 1970s was how various professions "do it" -- a mild sex pun. For example, "Divers Do It Deeper." Preservation in Pink did a bumper sticker in 2011:…
“Hoarders suffer from ‘stock home’ syndrome”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many people to hoard. "Stock home syndrome" (for Stockholm syndrome) was a popular pun, although it had been used earlier. "Are we really…
“Home invasions should decline. Everyone is at home with guns…”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic led some to speculate about home invasions -- or, rather, a lack of them. "Home invasions should decline. Everyone is at home with guns and enough bleach and…
“Home is where I can look and feel ugly and enjoy it”
"Home is where I can look and feel ugly and enjoy it" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "YES!!!!! RT @Sassycas home is where I can look and feel ugly and enjoy…
“Home is where I can look ugly and enjoy it”
"Home is where I can look and feel ugly and enjoy it" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "YES!!!!! RT @Sassycas home is where I can look and feel ugly and enjoy…
“Home is where my plants are”
"Home is where my/the/your plants are" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The variation is based on the 19th century saying, "Home is where the heart is."…
“Home is where our story begins”
"Home is where our story beings" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying has been cited in print since at least 2006 and is of unknown authorship. Lizzie-Kate, Inc.…
“Home is where the cat hair is”
"Home is where the cat hair is" and "Home is where the cat hair sticks to everything but the cat" are jocular cat sayings that have been printed on many images. "A home is…
“Home is where the cat hair sticks to everything but the cat”
"Home is where the cat hair is" and "Home is where the cat hair sticks to everything but the cat" are jocular cat sayings that have been printed on many images. "A home is…
“Home is where the cat hairs stick to everything… except the cat”
"Home is where the cat hair is" and "Home is where the cat hair sticks to everything but the cat" are jocular cat sayings that have been printed on many images. "A home is…
“Home is where the dog hair is”
"Home is where the dog hair is” and and "Home is where the dog hair sticks to everything but the dog" are jocular dog saying that have been printed on many images. "Home is…
“Home is where the dog hair sticks to everything but the dog”
"Home is where the dog hair is” and and "Home is where the dog hair sticks to everything but the dog" are jocular dog saying that have been printed on many images. "Home is…
“Home is where the dog hair sticks to everything except the dog”
"Home is where the dog hair is” and and "Home is where the dog hair sticks to everything but the dog" are jocular dog saying that have been printed on many images. "Home is…
“Home is where the heart is”
"Home" was a popular subject for early 19th century poetry. "The heart which forms the home" is a line in the poem "Solitude" that was published in The Literary…
“Home is where the mortgage is”
"Home is where the heart is" is an old saying. "Home is where the mortgage is" is a variation of the proverb that was cited in The Foolish Dictionary (1904) by Gideon Wurdz…