“Cleaning is better when no one else is home”
"cleaning is better when no one else is home" was posted on X/Twitter by val on March 23, 2019, and this received over 60,000 likes. "tbh cleaning is better when no one else is…
“Cleaning is just putting stuff in less obvious places”
"Cleaning is just putting stuff in less obvious places" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Cleaning is basically just putting stuff in less obvious places.…
“Cleaning the house while your kids are home is like brushing your teeth while eating an Oreo”
"Cleaning with kids in the house is like brushing your teeth while eating Oreos" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Cleaning the house with children in it is…
“Cleaning the house with children in it is like brushing your teeth while eating Oreo cookies”
"Cleaning with kids in the house is like brushing your teeth while eating Oreos" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Cleaning the house with children in it is…
“Cleaning windows is a pane in the glass”
"Fixing broken windows is a pane in the glass" is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images. "Pane in the glass" is a pun on "pain in the ass." There…
“Cleaning with kids in the house is like brushing your teeth while eating Oreos”
"Cleaning with kids in the house is like brushing your teeth while eating Oreos" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "Cleaning the house with children in it is…
“Come on up and I’ll show you my etchings” (sexual trope)
"Come on up and I'll show you my etchings" is an old veiled language joke that has been printed on many images. The speaker (usually a man) wants to lure a person (usually a woman)…
“ConEd, y’all must be adding the street lights to my bill”
"I feel like they are adding street lights to my electric bill" is a saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the electric bill is expensive. Various energy companies have…
“CONTAGIOUS in a sentence: it will take the CONTAGIOUS to finish painting her house with a brush”
The word "contagious" can sound like "c-nt ages." A joke has a teacher asking a student for a sentence using the word "contagious." One student says that a father…
“Could anyone give me a fern? (Asking for a frond)”
"asking for a friend" shouldn't be confused with "asking for a frond," but there are many jokes. "Palm oil is really bad for you, right? I'm asking for a…
“Cracked windows are a pane in the glass”
"Fixing broken windows is a pane in the glass" is a jocular saying that has been printed on several images. "Pane in the glass" is a pun on "pain in the ass." There…
“Currently stuck at an auction bidding for a house with a lengthy corridor. In it for the long hall”
"@simontkey I’ve joined the army so I can afford the 100 metre corridor I want in my house. I’m in it for the long hall" was posted on Twitter on August 20, 2010. "In it for the…
“Damn girl, are you a fire alarm? Because you’re really loud and annoying”
"Damn girl, are you a fire alarm? Because you're really loud and annoying" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "Damn girl are you a fire alarm cause your loud as…
“Damn girl, are you a smoke detector?” (joke)
Many people are annoyed by smoke detectors that go off when people are cooking, or that never stop beeping when the battery is low. A joke is: "Dammmn girl, are you a smoke detector? Cause…
“Danger. Do not touch. Not only will this kill you, it will hurt the whole time you’re dying” (sign)
"Danger. Do not touch. Not only will this kill you, it will hurt the whole time you're dying" is a sign that has been printed on many images. "Via @popurls: Not only will this…
“Day 6 of quarantine. Preparing to take out the garbage. So excited can’t decide what to wear”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic caused many people to be quarantined in their homes. People would, however, leave the home briefly to take out the garbage. "'I got so excited about…
“Day 7 at home and the dog is looking at me like, ‘See? This is why I chew the furniture’”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in home quarantines. People became more understanding of dogs. "End of Day 2 on lockdown and the dog is looking at me like 'SEE? This is why I…
“Dear Black Friday, We all have big tvs. Put rent on sale”
Black Friday sales often have reduced price televisions, but most people need reduced price necessities. "DEAR BLACK FRIDAY: We already have BIG TVs. Put rent & mortgage on sale…
“Dear public bathroom hand dryers, You forgot to add ‘dry hands on pants’ to your instructions. Sincerely, disappointed yet again”
Bathroom hand dryers almost never work well, and users ultimately have to wipe their hands on their pants. "Bathroom hand dryers are amazing if you want to kill a few minutes before wiping…
“Dear Santa, beware of dog kisses” (sign)
"Beware of dog" is a popular sign. "Beware of dog kisses" is a sign that has been printed on many images. The sign became popular in 2011 and 2012. "Beware of Dog Kisses by…