“A thief believes everybody steals” (proverb)
"A thief believes everybody steals" is a saying that has been printed on many images. Rather than find personal fault, the thief believes -- or wants to believe -- that everyone else is…
Work/Businesses
“A thief entered a theatre. He stole the spotlight”
The theatre expression "to steal the spotlight" means to become the focus of attention. For example, a physically attractive actor can steal the spotlight from everyone else. The idiom…
“A thief is more moral than a congressman. When a thief steals your money…”
"A thief is more moral than a congressman; when a thief steals your money, he doesn't demand you thank him" is a quotation credited to American economist Walter E. Williams…
“A three-legged dog walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." One popular joke is: "A three-legged dog walks into a saloon, looks around, and says,…
“A Tibetan monk sees Jesus in a tub of margarine and cries, ‘I can’t believe it’s not Buddha!’”
"I can't believe it's not Buddha!" is a pun on "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter!" that has been printed on many images. There have been several jokes.…
“A tie game is like kissing your sister”
"Like kissing your sister" means something that is perfunctory, without much pleasure. The saying "like kissing your sister" has been cited in print since at least 1892. Since…
“A tiger doesn’t lose sleep over the opinion of sheep” (proverb)
Entry in progress -- B.P."A lion/tiger doesn't lose sleep over the opinion of sheep" is a popular saying that has been printed on many posters.…
“A time traveler walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A time travel version is: "Bartender says 'We don't serve time travelers…
“A time-stretched sinusoid walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A physics version is: "A time-stretched sinusoid walks into a bar. The bartender asks,…
“A tomato is technically a fruit, but it usually identifies as a vegetable. It’s a transplant”
"Transplant" does not mean "trans plant," but there are jokes. "I'm tired of people telling a tomato is a fruit! It might be a fruit, but maybe it self identifies as a…
“A ton of money” (a large amount of money)
"A ton of money" means a lot of money. A "ton" metaphorically means any large amount; a physical ton of dollars is worth $908,000 and a physical ton of pennies is worth $3,632.…
“A topiary expert walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A popular version involving a horse is: "A horse walks into a bar and the barman says,…
“A tortilla chip is just a biodegradable spoon”
Many people use tortilla chips as spoons for salsa and hummus. These chip "spoons" are environmentally friendly. "chips are just biodegradable spoons for home made hummus" was…
“A towel walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A towel version is: "A towel walks into a bar. He orders a drink and says,…
“A town legalized pot, but banned alcohol. The residents were left high and dry”
"What do you call a place where marijuana is legal but alcohol isn't? High and dry" was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on March 1, 2020. "What do you call a place where marijuana is…
“A town so small, people only lock their car doors during the zucchini harvest”
Garrison Keillor is the host of a program on Minnesota Public Radio about a small, fictional town called Lake Wobegon. The town is so small that people lock their car doors only in July during the…
“A town with a lot of park benches is a sity”
"City" has nothing to do with "sit," but there are jokes. "What do you call a town with a lot of benches? A sitty" was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on August 5, 2023.…
“A tradition unlike any other” (The Masters golf tournament)
The Augusta (GA) National Golf Club is home to The Masters golf tournament. The slogan of "A Tradition Unlike Any Other" was trademarked in 2015, with a first use in 1989. CBS television…
“A tragedy is a ship full of bankers sinking. A catastrophe is when they can all swim”
A joke about bankers is: Q: What's the difference between a tragedy and a catastrophe?A: A tragedy is a ship full of bankers going down in a storm. A catastrophe is when they can all swim. The…
“A train is like a moving waiting room”
Various forms of transportation have been described as "a moving waiting room." "Traveling is kind of like sitting in a moving waiting room" was posted on Reddit --…