“Sex is like pizza—even when it’s bad, you still have to pay for it”
“Pizza is like sex -- when it's good, it’s terrific, and when it's bad, it's still pretty good" is a saying that has been associated with Goldberg’s Pizza in New York…
Archive for /P21140
Graveyard Shift
A "graveyard shift" is a night shift, usually between midnight and 6 a.m. There is no direct explanation of the origin of the term, but the darkness and quiet of night perhaps reminded…
“Waiting in traffic is like getting in line to go to work”
People often get stuck in traffic on the way to work. "Traffic is depressing. It's just waiting in line to go to work" was posted on Twitter by Jebb Sinclair on September 7, 2013.…
“What do you call a cook who becomes a lawyer?”/“A sue chef.”
A sous-chef de cuisine (French for “under-chef of the kitchen") shouldn’t be confused with a “sue” chef, but there are jokes. Some versions have it as when a cook becomes a lawyer,…
“What do you call a lawyer who becomes a cook?”/“A sue chef.”
A sous-chef de cuisine (French for “under-chef of the kitchen") shouldn’t be confused with a “sue” chef, but there are jokes. Some versions have it as when a cook becomes a lawyer,…
“Dad, are we pyromaniacs?”/“Yes, we arson.”
"Arson" sounds like "are son." A pun was posted on Reddit -- Dad Jokes on August 9, 2018: "Dad, are we pyromaniacs?"“Yes, we arson.” Reddit -- Dad JokesDad, are we…
“I used to be an expert in the Dunning-Kruger effect. Then I started to learn more about it”
The Dunning-Kruger effect describes a cognitive bias in which people of low ability assess their abilities to be greater than they actually are. There have been several jokes about it. "About…
“Why did the boy smear peanut butter on the road?”/“To go with the traffic jam.”
A "traffic jam" isn't made of jam, but there's a riddle: Q: Why did the boy smear peanut butter on the road?A: To go with the traffic jam. The joke was posted on the newsgroup…
“What do you call someone who fixes tiny cars?”/“A quantum mechanic.”
"Quantum mechanics" shouldn't be confused with "auto mechanics," but there are jokes. "There is a hoary old joke: What do you call a physicist who works on quantum…
“Teachers tell us to follow our dreams, but get mad when we fall asleep in their class”
"Teachers always say follow your dreams. But when I fall asleep in class, they get mad at me for taking their advice" is a jocular line that was posted on Twitter by "brian with an…
“Three vampires walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A vampire version has three vampires walk into a bar. The first two order blood (or a…
“The opposite of New Orleans is Old Andfat”
"the opposite of New Orleans is Old Andsits" is a joke that was posted on Twitter by Autopsy Turvy on November 11, 2016. "The opposite of new orleans is old andfats" was posted…
“A user interface is like a joke. If you have to explain it, it’s not that good”
"A user interface is like a joke. If you have to explain it, it's not that good" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Twitter by Martin LeBlanc…
“Work until you no longer need to introduce yourself”
"Hustle/Work until you no longer have/need to introduce yourself" is a work saying that has been printed on many images. Authorship is unknown, but possibly comes from several of the…
“Hustle until you no longer have to introduce yourself”
"Hustle/Work until you no longer have/need to introduce yourself" is a work saying that has been printed on many images. Authorship is unknown, but possibly comes from several of the…
“How many donkeys are there in NYC?”/“Five burros.”
New York City had five boroughs. It's sometimes joked that New York has five burros. A restaurant in Forest Hills, Queens, called "5 Burro Cafe" opened in 1990. "The Five…
“Meatballs are just the cupcake versions of meatloaf”
Meatballs are sometimes said to be smaller versions of meatloaf. "Meatballs are the cupcakes of the meatloaf family" was posted on Twitter by ben johnson on September 15, 2010.…
“Hustle until you no longer need to introduce yourself”
"Hustle/Work until you no longer have/need to introduce yourself" is a work saying that has been printed on many images. Authorship is unknown, but possibly comes from several of the…
“It’s a slow process, but quitting won’t speed it up”
"It's a slow process, but quitting won't speed it up" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. "It's a slow process but quitting makes…
“Broken trust is like a melted chocolate…”
"Broken trust is like (a) melted chocolate. No matter how many times you try to freeze it, it will never return to its original shape" is a saying about trust that has been printed on…