"The main function of the little toe on your foot is to make sure that all the furniture in the house is in place" -- another way of saying that the toe often bumps into the furniture --…
A coffee filter shouldn’t be confused with a "coughy filter," but there are jokes. "In an emergency flu masks can be used as coughy filters" was posted on Twitter by Simon…
The term "high maintenance" usually has nothing to do with janitors, but there are jokes. "Janitors who work in skyscrapers are high maintenance" was posted on Twitter by rodney…
"You Matter. Unless/Until you multiply yourself by the speed of light squared. Then you Energy" is a science joke that has been printed on many images. The saying is based on the famous…
"Why we hate lazy people? they are not doing anything anyway" is a question that was asked on Twitter by DearDiary on June 4, 2019. "Why is everyone mad at lazy people? They’re not…
"An apple a day is bullshit. Apples are dangerous. Just look at Eve, Snow White, Blackberry or any pig at a luau" is a jocular apple saying that has been printed on many images. The…
"You Matter. Unless/Until you multiply yourself by the speed of light squared. Then you Energy" is a science joke that has been printed on many images. The saying is based on the famous…
The term "high maintenance" usually has nothing to do with janitors, but there are jokes. "The janitor lady for my apartment building asked me out on a date & said she had some…
"An apple a day is bullshit. Apples are dangerous. Just look at Eve, Snow White, Blackberry or any pig at a luau" is a jocular apple saying that has been printed on many images. The…
Many people refuse to drink tap water until it’s gone though their Brita filter -- even though they haven’t changed that filter in years! This popular comment was posted on Twitter by Mac…
"My girlfriend would probably throw up if I told her I put ginger in the curry she’s eating. She loved that cat" is a joke -- "Ginger" is the name of the cat -- that was…
"I want to make pancakes, but I keep waffling" -- "waffling" is a joke on "waffles" -- is a jocular saying that has been printed on a sign. "This morning the…
Many people cry when they chop up onions, and this is the subject of a popular dark joke. "When I cut up onions, it always makes me cry. He was a good dog and will be missed" was posted…
"People eat meat and think they will become as strong as an ox, forgetting that the ox eats grass" ("La gente mangia carne e pensa: 'Diventerò forte come un bue'.…
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." Religious versions are: “A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The bartender…
"I want to make pancakes, but I keep waffling" -- "waffling" is a joke on "waffles" -- is a jocular saying that has been printed on a sign. "This morning the…
A math riddle is: Q: Why did the mathematician work from home?A: Because he could only function in his domain. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2012. TwitterPeter…
"Taxes are essentially just a yearly subscription to the country you live in. Childhood is the free trial" is a saying that has been printed on many images. This quote was posted on…
"You have been assigned this mountain to show others (that) it can be moved" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. The saying is all about challenges…
"Never assume that loud is strong and quiet is weak" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. "Never assume quiet is weak and loud is strong. #leadership"…