“The broccoli says, ‘I look like a small tree’ ...” (joke)
A banana reminds many of the male sex organ. A joke is: "The broccoli says, ' I look like a small tree.' The mushroom says, 'I look like an umbrella.' The walnut says,…
Archive for 06/2017
“Some idiot at the gym put a water bottle in the Pringles can holder of this treadmill”
"Some idiot put a water bottle in the Pringles can holder of this treadmill" is a jocular gym saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Twitter on August 18,…
“I love sarcasm. It’s like punching people in the face, but with words”
"I love sarcasm. It's like punching people in the face, but with words" is a jocular one-line saying about sarcasm that has been printed on many images. "Sarcasm is another way…
“Cupcakes are muffins that believed in miracles”
"Cupcakes are muffins that believed in miracles" is a cupcake saying that has been printed on many images . The saying was posted on Twitter on December 13, 2010, but became popular in…
“I’m allergic to stupidity, so I break out in sarcasm”
"I'm allergic to stupidity, so I break out in sarcasm" is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Twitter on September 25, 2012.…
“I’m a woman. I have needs. Pass me the wine”
"I'm a woman. I have needs. Pass me the wine"is a wine saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Twitter on May 19, 2016. "I'm a woman, I have…
“What do you get when you cross a chili pepper, a shovel and a terrier?”/“A hot-diggity-dog.”
A joke on the expression "Hot diggity dog!" is: Q: What do you get when you cross a chili pepper, a shovel and a terrier?A: A hot-diggity-dog. The riddle was posted on Twitter on July 17,…
“If it looks like piss, smells like piss and tastes like piss—then it must be Budweiser”
“If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, swims like a duck and quacks like a duck, it’s a duck” is an old saying. A jocular version about beer is: "If it looks like piss, smells like…
“Find something worth dying for, then live for it”
"Find something worth dying for, and/then live for it" is an inspirational saying that has been printed on many images."Find something worth dying for. Then fervently live for…
“When profit is the motor of society, destruction is considered as progress”
"When profit is the motor of society, destruction is considered as progress" is a saying that has been put on an image of smokestacks destroying the environment. The saying was posted on…
“I’m drinking vodka and prune juice. I call it a pile driver”
A "Screwdriver" is a cocktail of vodka and orange juice. A "Piledriver" (or "Pile Driver") is sometimes said to be a cocktail of vodka and prune juice (a laxative that…
“Are you watching too much TV, but not doing enough reading? Turn your subtitles on. Problem solved”
"Are you watching too much T.V but not doing enough reading? Turn your subtitles on" is a jocular one-line saying about television. The saying was posted on Twitter by "Not Zach…
“Our days are happier when we give people a bit of our heart rather than a piece of our mind”
"Our days are happier when we give people a bit of our heart rather than a piece of our mind" is an inspirational saying that has been printed on many images. "You will be happier if…
“Dear whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office—I will track you down. You have my Word”
"Dear whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office -- I will track you down. You have my Word" is a Microsoft Office-Word pun that has been printed on many images. The joke was posted on…
“Avoid parking tickets by leaving your wipers on high”
Parking tickets are usually --but not always -- placed under windshield wipers. "Avoid parking tickets by leaving your wipers on high" is a jocular parking saying that has been printed on…
Rocky Road (ice cream)
"Rocky Road" is a candy or an ice cream flavor of chocolate, marshmallows and nuts. Rocky Road was popularized in California, Oregon and Washington in the 1920s. "Rocky Road A…
“Your ignorance is their power”
"Your ignorance is their power" is a political saying that has been printed on many images. The saying has been cited in print since at least 1978, but became popular on many images (such…
“‘Too much milk left need more cereal’ always leads to ‘too much cereal need more milk’”
Some people must always have a cereal and milk balance. "'Too much milk left need more cereal' always leads to 'too much cereal need more milk'" is a jocular saying…
“Replace excuses with effort, replace laziness with determination, and everything falls into place”
"Replace excuses with effort, replace laziness with determination, and everything will fall into place" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was…
“Accept people as they are. Believe in what they can become”
"Accept people as they are. Believe in what they can become" is an inspirational saying that has been printed on several images. The saying was posted on Twitter by Billy Cox on March 25…