“What’s the strongest vegetable?”/“A muscle sprout.”
The Brussels sprout has a riddle: Q: What's the strongest vegetable?A: A muscle sprout. The "muscle sprout" joke has been cited in print since at least 2002. “What do you call…
Archive for 10/2016
“Why is history like a fruit cake?”/“Because it’s full of dates.”
A popular fruit cake joke is: Q: Why is history like a fruit cake?A: Because it's full of dates. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2000. Google Books1001 Really Stupid JokesBy…
“What did the lettuce say to the celery?”/“Quit stalking me!”
A popular pun about the celery stalk is: Q: What did the lettuce say to the celery?A: Quite stalking me! A form of the joke was printed in Boys' Life magazine in May 1985. Google BooksMay…
“Why did the baby ganoush grow up big and strong?”/“It had good auber-genes.”
Eggplant is also called aubergine, and there's a joke: Q: Why did the baby ganoush grow up big and strong?A: It had good auber-genes. The joke has been cited in print since at least 2011.…
“Roses are red. Wine is also red. Poems are hard. Wine”
A popular wine poem has been written on many images: "Roses are red.Wine is also red.Poems are hard.Wine." The short poem went viral on Twitter on July 10, 2012. Various other verses had…
“There’s always time for a glass of wine”
"There's always time for a glass of wine" is a saying that has been printed on many signs and wall plaques. Brooklyn's Poly Prep had "But it's always time for a glass…
“What’s the fastest vegetable?”/“A runner bean.”
A "runner bean" isn't necessarily athletic, but there's a riddle: Q: What is the fastest vegetable?A: The runner bean! The joke has been cited in print since at least 1972.…
“Dear Pringles, I can no longer fit my hand inside your tube of deliciousness”
Pringles potato chips are sold in tubes that prevent the chips from being crushed. Adults can't fit their hands all the way inside the tubes, and there's a joke letter to Pringles:…
“What do you call a retired vegetable?”/“A has-bean.”
"Bean" can sound like "been," and there's a pun: QL What do you call a retired vegetable?A: A has-bean. "What do you call an obsolete Java Bean? A…
“What do you call two banana skins?”/“A pair of slippers.”
The banana peel gag -- laughing at someone slipping on a banana peel -- was popular in the late 1800s and early 1900s. One joke is: Q: What do you call two banana skins?A: A pair of slippers.…
“What do you call a stolen Tesla?”/“An Edison.”
Tesla Motors was named after Serbian-American inventor Nikola Tesla (1856-1943), who died at his residence in New York City's New Yorker Hotel (where there is a commemorative plaque).…
“Oxygen and Magnesium walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A chemistry joke is: "Oxygen and Magnesium walk into a bar. The bartender says,…
“An economist is a man who states the obvious in terms of the incomprehensible”
"An economist is a man who states the obvious in terms of the incomprehensible" is a popular economics saying of uncertain authorship. American agricultural economist Donald…
“Music with dinner is an insult both to the cook and the violinist”
New York (NY) Times food journalist Craig Claiborne (1920-2000) wrote on November 16, 1967: "The Adrian Zorgniottis agree with G. K. Chesterton, who told a friend, 'Music with dinner is…
“Why did the jalapeño put on a sweater?”/“Because he was a little chili.”
A jalapeño pepper joke is: Q: Why did the jalapeño put on a sweater?A: Because he was a little chili. "Why did the jalapeño always wear a sweater? Because he was a chilly pepper" was…
“I’m going bananas…is what I say to my bananas before leaving the house”
"Go bananas" is slang for "to lose control" or "to go crazy." There's a joke: "I am going bananas. That's what I say to my bananas before i leave the…
“The cook’s course is the hardest course in the army”
"The cook's course is the hardest course in the army/navy," it's often joked. "No one has passed it yet." The joke serves as an explanation of why military food is so…
Alphabet Soup (agency names)
"Alphabet soup" is a noodle soup with alphabet-shaped noodles. The soup is cited in print since the 1880s and 1890s. The New Deal legislation of the 1930s resulted in many new government…
Alphabet Mafia (media companies)
"Alphabet mafia" has at least three different meanings. Government agencies (such as the current FBI, CIA, NSA, IRS, FCC, FDA, EPA and much more) have been called "alphabet…
Alphabet Mafia
"Alphabet mafia" has at least three different meanings. Government agencies (such as the current FBI, CIA, NSA, IRS, FCC, FDA, EPA and much more) have been called "alphabet…