“Exercise can add years to your life” (joke)
"Exercise can add years to your life.. For example I ran a mile today and now I feel like I'm 95" is a joke that was cited on Twitter on April 7, 2014. The original author of the…
Archive for 05/2015
“Never ask a woman who’s eating ice cream from the carton how she’s doing”
It's an old joke that people who reach for a pint of Haagen-Dazs or Ben & Jerry's ice cream and eat the whole pint -- all at once, straight from the container -- have some problems in…
“How did the person who invented the first clock know what time it was?”
People set their clocks and watches to other ones, leading to a joke: "How did the person who invented the first clock know what time it was?" "How did the person who invented the…
“Watch grass grow” (a boring activity)
Something that is “like watching (the) grass grow” is something that is very boring. "Slow motion pictures are to be used in the teaching of golf and if they even film Chet Smith teeing…
“Dig a five-dollar hole for a fifty-cent plant” (gardening adage)
A gardening adage is that it's better to dig a five-dollar hole for a fifty-cent plant than to big a fifty-cent hole for a five-dollar plant. A good plant won't grow well in bad soil, but…
Fight of the Century (boxing billing)
Many boxing matches have been hyped as the "fight of the century." John L. Sullivan against Jake Kilrain in 1889 was called "the biggest fight of the century" and "the…
“Don’t prune in May or June” (gardening adage)
A popular gardening adage rhymes "prune" and "June." “Don't Prune in May or June" was cited in print in 1980. "If it flowers before June, don't prune"…
“No justice, no peace, no racist police!”
"No justice, no peace!" has been cited in print since 1987 and was popularized by American Baptist minister and civil rights activist Al Sharpton. "No justice, no peace, no racist…
“Watch paint dry” (a boring activity)
Something that is "like watching paint dry" is something that is very boring. "Waiting for them to score one (the Dodgers to score a run -- ed.) is like watching paint dry" was…
“A walk is as good as a hit” (baseball adage)
"A walk is as good as a hit" is a baseball adage that encourages a batter not to swing at bad pitches. If the bases are empty, a walk is as good as a hit. However, if it's the bottom…
“Walks will kill you” (baseball adage)
"Walks will kill you (almost every time)" is a popular baseball adage. A walk doesn't give the fielders the opportunity to make a play on a ball, but gives the batter a pass to first…
Buzzard Boulevard (Broadway)
"Back to Broadway, otherwise known as Buzzard Boulevard," Broadway columnist Mark Hellinger (1903-1947) wrote in 1933. Hellinger meant that Broadway was full of buzzards -- human vultures…
“You can judge a lot about a restaurant by how they maintain their restrooms”
Entry in progress -- B.P. TwitterDJ Damian P@DJDamianPYou can tell a lot about a venue based on how well they maintain their restrooms.1:22 PM - 17 Apr 2012 yelp (Phoenix, AZ) El Ranchero…
“The world needs ditch diggers, too”
"The world needs ditch diggers, too" is a line from the film comedy Caddyshack (1980): Danny Noonan: I planned to go to law school after I graduated, but it looks like my folks won't…
“What’s up, cake?”/“Muffin much.”
"What's up, cake?"/"Muffin much" is a jocular conversation that has been illustrated on T-shirts. The short conversation has been cited on Twitter since February 10, 2010.…