"I gave my freedom away to get my freedom back and I'm still not free and it's all your fault" (or "I gave up my freedom to get my freedom back and I'm still not free…
A joke at first sounds like a new year's resolution, but it isn't. "I gave up drinking on the 1st of January. It's better for your health, and it's only one day a…
"I gave my freedom away to get my freedom back and I'm still not free and it's all your fault" (or "I gave up my freedom to get my freedom back and I'm still not free…
A joke about giving up a seat on the bus was posted to Reddit on October 8, 2016: "I gave up my seat to a blind person on the bus. That's how I lost my job as a bus driver." The joke…
Confederate General Robert E. Lee (1807-1870) has a name that sounds like the word "generally" (General Lee). "Civil War jokes? I General Lee don't find them funny" is a…
Confederate General Robert E. Lee (1807-1870) has a name that sounds like the word "generally" (General Lee). "Civil War jokes? I General Lee don't find them funny" is a…
Confederate General Robert E. Lee (1807-1870) has a name that sounds like the word "generally" (General Lee). "Civil War jokes? I General Lee don't find them funny" is a…
People who forget to bring lunch from home to work often have to buy it. A saying was posted on Reddit -- Shower Thoughts on August 11, 2017: "I get fatter and broker each time I don't…
"I get most of my exercise these days from shaking my head in disbelief" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. The quote was posted on Twitter by Mr Roger Quimbly on…
"I get nostalgic when reversing my car. It always takes me back" is a car joke that was posted on Reddit -- Dad Jokes on June 18, 2018. The joke was also posted on Reddit -- Oneliners and…
"I get paid to be nice at work. Not sure why family and friends expect that for free" is a jocular line that has been printed on ecards. "I get paid to be nice to people at work. So…
"I give in to beer pressure" -- a beer pun on "peer pressure" -- is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. "I give into peer pressure" is another form…
How does one rate an eclipse? How many stars? "I score the eclipse, minus one star" was posted on Twitter on March 20, 2015. Reviewers of the August 21, 2017 solar eclipse were more…
"I go to the gym almost every day -- almost Monday, almost Tuesday..." is a joke spoken by someone who almost never goes to the gym. "I go to the gym almost every day. Almost Monday,…
To do something "religiously" usually means to do it regularly and well -- to please God. However, not everyone is religious. "Tell people you go to the gym religiously When they…
"I go to work, I make my coworkers wonder what is wrong with me, and then I clock out" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "I go to work, I make my coworkers wonder…
"Courtesy of @themiltonjones live tonight in St Albans: don't try googling 'lost medieval servant boy.' You'll get 'page not found'" was posted on Twitter by…
"I got a bill in the mail that said FINAL NOTICE. What a relief!" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. That is, the speaker is happy not to be bothered again about…
New York-based comedian Henny Youngman (1906-1998) did a liquor commercial in 1972: “I got a case of Hoffman’s for my wife...that’s not a bad trade.” The line has had many variations.…
Customer service for a communications company such as Comcast or Spectrum can take a long time. A joke was posted on Twitter by Simon Holland on May 8, 2017: "I got a job at Comcast and…