“In hell, every sandwich is made with Miracle Whip”
Many people either love or hate Miracle Whip (originally a less expensive alternative to mayonnaise). "RT @YourFavWhiteGuy: Even bums turn down sandwiches made with Miracle Whip" was…
Alphebetical for "i"
“In high school, our gym teacher asked us who we thought the smartest teacher in the school was…”
Who is the smartest teacher in a school? This was posted on Twitter by 𝕤𝕦𝕟𝕗𝕝𝕠𝕨𝕖𝕣 on February 29, 2020, and received over 1,100,000 likes: "in high school our gym…
“In Hitler’s defence, he did kill Hitler”
German politician and leader of the Nazi Party Adolf Hitler (1889-1945) shot himself in the head on April 30, 1945, just as Soviet troops were approaching. (Many believe tat Hitler escaped to South…
“In Hitler’s defense, he did kill Hitler”
German politician and leader of the Nazi Party Adolf Hitler (1889-1945) shot himself in the head on April 30, 1945, just as Soviet troops were approaching. (Many believe tat Hitler escaped to South…
“In hockey, goaltending is 75 percent of the game—unless it’s bad goaltending”
"In hockey, goaltending is 75 percent of the game. Unless it's bad goaltending. Then it's 100 percent of the game because you're going to lose" was credited to former…
“In honor of tax season, for an extra $50, the hookers in Times Square will handle your extension”
American late night television comedian David Letterman hosted the New York City-based shows Late Night with David Letterman on NBC and Late Show with David Letterman on CBS, broadcasting from 1982…
“In honor of the fall equinox, I will also be cold, distant & filled with darkness”
"In honor of the fall equinox I will also be cold, distant & filled with darkness" is a joke that was posted on X/Twitter by Doth on Septembe 23, 2019, and this received over 7,300…
“In honor of the winter solstice, I also will be cold, distant & filled with darkness”
"In honor of the winter solstice I also will be cold, distant & filled with darkness" was posted on Twitter by Doth on December 21, 2017. "I also will" was changed to…
“In honor of the winter solstice, I will also be cold, distant & filled with darkness”
"In honor of the winter solstice I also will be cold, distant & filled with darkness" was posted on Twitter by Doth on December 21, 2017. "I also will" was changed to…
“In Iowa, they pick corn; in New Hampshire, they pick presidents”
New Hampshire likes to brag that its primary is more important that the Iowa caucus to the presidential election cycle. In 1988, Vice President George H. W. Bush lost the Iowa caucus to Kansas…
“In journalism, the pay might be low and the hours long, but at least everyone hates you”
There's a "joke" in journalism that the pay is low and the hours are long -- but at least everyone hates you. The saying has been printed on several images. "Though I learned a…
“In life, the only thing you ever have to do is die. Everything else is a choice”
“The only thing I HAVE to do in this life is die. Everything else is a choice with consequences -- including breathing" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. The…
“In life, unlike chess, the game continues after checkmate”
"In life, unlike chess, the game continues after checkmate" is a proverb that American science fiction author Isaac Asimov (1920-1992) wrote in Fantastic Voyage II: Destination Brain…
“In life, you are either a passenger or a pilot. It’s your choice”
"In life, you are either a passenger of a pilot. It's your choice" is a motivational saying that has been printed on many images. The saying was posted on Twitter on February 20,…
“In light of plummeting oil prices, Exxon Mobil plans to lay off several members of Congress”
It is an old saying that Congress has been bought off by major corporations. "If the price of gas drops any further Exxon is going to have to lay off several members of Congress" was…
“In light of the collapsing economy, JPMorgan plans to lay off several members of Congress”
It is an old saying that Congress has been bought off by major corporations. "If the price of gas drops any further Exxon is going to have to lay off several members of Congress" was…
“In Massachusetts, booster shot is spelled borcester shot”
The COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic resulted in vaccines, and these vaccines had booster shots. "In Massachusetts, booster shot is spelled borcester shot" was posted on Twitter by Adam…
“In matters of principle, stand like a rock; in matters of taste, swim with the current”
The Youth's Companion (a popular American children's magazine) published this anonymous line in 1891: "Either as wife, sister, husband or brother, if you would have a happy family…
“In moments of doubt, trust your gut, hug your dog, and eat a donut”
"In moments of doubt, trust your gut, hug your dog, and eat a donut" is a saying that has been printed on many images. "In moments of doubt trust your gut, hug your dog, and eat a…
“In most cases, cell phones won’t crack when you drop them”
"In most cases, cell phones won't crack when you drop them" is a joke that was posted on Reddit -- Oneliners on May 31, 2019. "In most cases" doesn't mean "in…