“If heat rises, why is the North Pole so cold?”
"If heat rises to the top why is the north pole the coldest place on earth?" was posted on Twitter by Tiffany Janay. "If heat rises, why is the North Pole so cold?" was posted…
Alphebetical for "i"
“If heaven had a flavor, it would be coffee”
"If heaven had a flavor, it would be coffee" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. "says if heaven had a flavor……… it would be coffee!" was posted on…
“If heaven had a flavour, it would be coffee”
"If heaven had a flavor, it would be coffee" is a coffee saying that has been printed on many images. "says if heaven had a flavor……… it would be coffee!" was posted on…
“If history has taught us anything, it’s that reheated french fries are gross”
Reheated french fries are never good, but some people still reheat them, anyway. "Reheated french fries are always gross. Just thought I would share that" was posted on Twitter on…
“If Hitler’s still alive, I hope he’s out of town with a musical” (Larry Gelbart)
Larry Gelbart (1928-2009) wrote the book for the successful Broadway musical A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum and achieved great success writing for the television show M*A*S*H, but…
“If homework is to read something, there is no homework”
If students are assigned to read something for homework, they often don't read it. "If the homework is to revise or read something then there is no homework" was posted on…
“If Hooters closes and becomes delivery only, would they have to change their name to Knockers?”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic made many restaurants close their dine-in facilities and become take-out and delivery only. A joke was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on March 30, 2020: "If…
“If I agree, it’s free speech. If I disagree, it’s hate speech”
"If I agree, it's free speech. If I disagree, it's hate speech" is a saying that has been printed on an image. "Free speech is only free if the left agrees with it. If they…
“If I ate beans and you ate beans how old would we be?” (riddle)
"Farty" sounds like "forty." "A married couple liked to eat beans. If the man was 2 yrs older than the woman what age was she? She was farty and he was farty too" was…
“If I blocked you on social media and you see me in public, the block still applies in real life”
"If I blocked you on social media and you see me in the streets, the block still applies in real life" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. There are several slight…
“If I blocked you on social media and you see me in the streets, the block still applies”
"If I blocked you on social media and you see me in the streets, the block still applies in real life" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. There are several slight…
“If I blocked you on social media and you see me in these streets, the block still applies”
"If I blocked you on social media and you see me in the streets, the block still applies in real life" is a jocular saying that has been printed on many images. There are several slight…
“If I book the hotel with the balcony, I hope you understand the assignment”
"If I book the hotel with the balcony, I hope you understand the assignment" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The "assignment" is probably that the speaker…
“If I can hear you chew, I have fantasized about your death”
"If I can hear you chew, I have fantasized about your death" is a saying that has been printed on many images. While the statement is meant to be a joke, misophonia (a disorder of…
“If I can hear you chew, I’ve fantasized about your death”
"If I can hear you chew, I have fantasized about your death" is a saying that has been printed on many images. While the statement is meant to be a joke, misophonia (a disorder of…
“If I could cure cancer, you’d say that I put doctors out of work” (bad press)
"If I (a politician) could cure cancer, you'd (the press would) say that I put doctors out of work" is a saying about someone who can never get honest press coverage, no matter what…
“If I could cure cancer, you’d say that I put doctors out of work” (bad press)
"If I (a politician) could cure cancer, you'd (the press would) say that I put doctors out of work" is a saying about someone who can never get honest press coverage, no matter what…
“If I could have dinner with anyone, alive or dead, I would want them to be alive”
A popular question is asks, "If you could have dinner with anyone, alive or dead, who would you choose?" Typical answers include one's parents, Jesus, George Washington and Thomas…
“If I could sell just one…” (”$30,000 pencil” sales joke)
A popular sales story is told about a beggar selling pencils on a sidewalk -- for $30,000 a pencil. A man walks buy and tells him that no one will buy a pencil for that price. "Probably…
“If I could walk on water, you’d say that I can’t swim” (bad press)
Jesus walking on water is recorded in three of the Gospels of the New Testament. Walking on water (a miracle) is often compared to swimming (a normal activity). A joke circulated in 1945 that…