“I wasn’t born in Texas, but I got here as fast as I could!”
"I wasn't born in Texas, but I got here as fast as I could!" is a popular bumper sticker that dates from at least 1994. T-Shirts N TexasI Wasn't Born in TexasAll Texans accept…
Alphebetical for "i"
“I wasn’t born Republican, Democrat, or yesterday”
"I wasn't born yesterday" means that the speaker is not so naive as to believe certain faulty arguments or proposals. "I wasn't born Republican, Democrat, or…
“I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere”
"I wasn't planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere" is a jocular line about running that has been printed on many images. "I wasn't planning on…
“I wasn’t surprised when I was fired from my graffiti removal job. I saw the writing on the wall”
Many employees see "the writing on the wall" at their places of employment, an idiom meaning that the employment situation might be ending soon. A joke takes the idiom literally. "my…
“i wasn’t made to work a 9-5, i was made to swim in turquoise waters, eat fruit, and paint in a villa by the sea”
"i wasn’t made to work a 9-5, i was made to swim in turquoise waters, eat fruit, and paint in a villa by the sea" is a saying that has been printed on many images. The saying is an…
“I wasn’t sitting here awaiting govt guidance on whether I could celebrate Christmas this year”
During the COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic, politicians and government health agencies gave advice on how to celebrate Christmas. Many people ignored the advice and celebrated Christmas however…
“I wasn’t sure what to make for dinner, so I opened a bottle of wine and now I don’t care”
"I wasn’t sure what to make for dinner, so I opened a bottle of wine & now I don’t care. A lesson for us all there I think" is a wine saying that has been printed on many images.…
“I wasn’t sure whether I should get into the human trafficking business. But now I’m sold”
The expression "I'm sold" is usually not taken literally, but there are puns. This was posted on Reddit -- Jokes on December 13, 2017: "I wasn’t sure about getting involved in…
“I watched a film where a guy poured meat juices over a nonfiction book. It’s baste on a true story”
Many dramatic works are "based on a true story." If that story involves food, maybe it's "baste on a true story"? The pun was printed in the book Ridiculous Riddles (2003)…
“I watched a film where a guy poured meat juices over a nonfiction book. It’s baste on a true story”
Many dramatic works are "based on a true story." If that story involves food, maybe it's "baste on a true story"? The pun was printed in the book Ridiculous Riddles (2003)…
“I watched a movie about graphs. The special f(x) were terrible”
The mathematical term "f(x)" sounds like the word "effects." A joke was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on March 17, 2019: "I watched a movie about graphs last night, but I…
“I watched a movie documentary about the history of tea exports. It was rated PG tips”
PG Tips (a brand of tea in the United Kingdom) has nothing to do with the PG (parental guidance) movie rating, but there are jokes. "RT @sickipediabot: I've just watched a film that was…
“I watched my first porno today… I looked so much younger back then”
"I watched my first porno today... I looked so much younger back then" is a joke that has been printed on many images. The joke is that the person is not watching his/her first porn…
“I watched this play at a disadvantage—the curtain was up” (Broadway saying)
A good seat in a theater can sometimes add to the enjoyment of the entertainment; a bad seat can make the stage difficult to see or hear. A famous theatrical saying (cited in print since at least…
“I wear a mask while jogging. It’s a running gag”
The 2019–20 coronavirus pandemic resulted in some requirements to wear face masks. Many people felt gagged by the masks. "I wear a mask while jogging. It's a running gag" was…
“I wear my T-shirt to bed because my coffee shirt keeps me awake”
T-shirts have nothing to do with tea, but there are jokes. "I wear my T-shirt to bed because my coffee shirt keeps me awake" was posted on Twitter by Broken Puppet on March 13, 2020.…
“I went bobsleighing the other day. Killed 20 Bobs”
A popular -- and obvious -- bobsleighing joke is: "I went bobsleighing the other day. Killed/Slayed/Sleighed 20 Bobs." The number of "Bobs" (or "bobs") has varied.…
“I went fishing on the weekend and used liquorice for bait. I caught allsorts”
"Went fishing today, used liquorice as bait. Caught allsorts" was posted on Twitter by Sickipedia_Feed on March 5, 2011. The joke was originally posted on the Sickipedia website. The…
“I went fishing today with my two friends, Rod and Annette”
Who's the best couple to go fishing with? Rod and Annette (a net), of course! "What do you call a Genestealer and a Sister of Battle fishing? Rod and Annette" was posted on the…
“I went fishing using liquorice as bait. I caught all sorts”
"Went fishing today, used liquorice as bait. Caught allsorts" was posted on Twitter by Sickipedia_Feed on March 5, 2011. The joke was originally posted on the Sickipedia website. The…