“The X is silent. It’s still pronounced Twitter”
The name of "Twitter" (an American microblogging and social networking service) was changed to "X" in 2023, but many people still call it Twitter. "xtwitter (the x is…
“If your coffee needs 4 pumps of syrup, whipped cream, and a drizzle… congratulations, you ordered dessert with anxiety”
Many people order a coffee that seems more like a dessert. This was posted on Facebook by Coffee on March 27, 2026: "If your coffee needs 4 pumps of syrup, whipped cream, and a drizzle……
“I look normal, but I talk to dogs like they’ll reply to me”
Facebook im not right in the head.com March 27, 2026 at 3:10 PM · Shared by the abnormal Kenneth Wright (The following text is shown on an image. -- ed.) I LOOK NORMAL BUT I TALK TO DOGS LIKE…
“I recently bought a shire horse. My existing horse was too outgoing”
LaffGaff Shire Horse by LaffGaff March 27, 2026 I recently bought a shire horse. My existing horse was too outgoing.
“We should’ve stopped somewhere between discovering fire and filing taxes. We did too much”
How did civilization evolve into filing taxes? This was posted on X/Twitter (and also on Bluesky and Threads) by Ꮍᴀᴇʟ on March 26, 2026, and it received over 35,000 likes: "We…
“Made my last student loan payment. I still owe a lot, but I’m just not paying anymore”
"🎉made my last car payment🎉 I still owe a lot but I’m just not paying anymore" was posted on X/Twitter by Brent Terhune on October 24, 2020, and this received over 16,000 likes.…
“What do you call a romantic dinner on a hot air balloon?”/“An update.”
A hot air balloon riddle was posted on Reddit -- Dadjokes on February 27, 2024: "Q: What do you call a romantic dinner on a hot air balloon? A: An update." The joke refers to the 2009…
“A classics professor goes to a tailor to get his trousers mended. The tailor asks: ‘Euripides?’” (joke)
A classic joke involving Euripides (a Greek tragedian of classical Athens) and Eumenides (a Greek tragedy by Aeschylus) has been cited in print since at least 1931. The joke involves a tailor and a…
“This morning I drank coffee so strong it briefly gave me confidence and opinions I was not qualified to have”
Coffee can give some people confidence -- maybe too much confidence. This was posted on Facebook by Coffee on March 21, 2026, and it received over 1,300 likes: "This morning I drank coffee so…
“This is a bad time to be in touch with reality”
It's usually good to be in touch with reality, but real life can be depressing. This was posted on X/Twitter by Myrna Tellingheusen on March 22, 2026, and it received over 8,000 likes:…
“Microwaves be like: here is your hot plate of cold rice”
A plate in a microwave oven might be hot, but the food might still be cold. "Dear microwave, Why is my plate so hot and my food so cold? http://dearblankpleaseblank.com for more" was…
“Microwaves be like: Here’s your hot plate of cold spaghetti”
A plate in a microwave oven might be hot, but the food might still be cold. "Dear microwave, Why is my plate so hot and my food so cold? http://dearblankpleaseblank.com for more" was…
“Microwaves be like: here is your hot bowl of cold soup”
A plate in a microwave oven might be hot, but the food might still be cold. "Dear microwave, Why is my plate so hot and my food so cold? http://dearblankpleaseblank.com for more" was…
“Microwave: Here’s your hot plate of cold food. Me: Weird flex but OK”
A plate in a microwave oven might be hot, but the food might still be cold. "Dear microwave, Why is my plate so hot and my food so cold? http://dearblankpleaseblank.com for more" was…
“Burning your mouth when you eat is your food cooking you”
"When you burn your mouth, it's the food cooking you back" is a jocular food saying that was posted on Re3ddit -- Showerthoughts on January 31, 2018. "When you get burned while…
“When you get burned while cooking, it’s just the food cooking you back
"When you burn your mouth, it's the food cooking you back" is a jocular food saying that was posted on Re3ddit -- Showerthoughts on January 31, 2018. "When you get burned while…
“When you burn your mouth, it’s the food cooking you back”
"When you burn your mouth, it's the food cooking you back" is a jocular food saying that was posted on Re3ddit -- Showerthoughts on January 31, 2018. "When you get burned while…
“Four Norse gods, 1 Roman god, and 2 astronomical bodies walk into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A calendar version is: "Four Norse gods, 1 Roman god, and 2 astronomical bodies walk…
“Pythagoras walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A Pythagorean theorem version is: "Pythagoras walks into a bar and says, 'Which…
“A geometry student walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
"A guy walks into a bar..." is a typical form of what has been called the "bar joke." A Pythagorean theorem version is: "Pythagoras walks into a bar and says, 'Which…